Moneyball won't win the Premiership 2012-13

Manchester United are now averaging over two-and-a-half points a game, which if they keep it up will edge them past Chelsea 2005's 95-point mark

Shearer explaining why playmaker-in-the-hole Adel Taraabt is rubbish because he doesn't run up and down or get himself in the box enough. What is the point, really?

The only mildly entertaining thing about Shearer is the comically high standards he claims to expect from everyone. I remember some world cup 0-0 where his analysis was that Luca Toni "should of scored half-a-dozen. At least". It may even have been only halftime.

enjoyed this from the first page gis results for "the two alans"

http://www.transportxtra.com/files/9167-m.jpg

Alan Wood and Alan Clark were behind Marston success in the Enforcement category at the British Parking Awards

Deniz Huseyin

Marston Group’s award-winning pair Alan Clark and Alan Wood have both left the civil enforcement agent. Group business development director Clark has retired while business development manager Wood is joining Whyte & Co in the new post of director of development.

you're going to fucking park. you're going to park here, in this bay, with the dotted fucking line around it. don't even try to drive off. you're parking.

lol

i am drunk but there is such a thing as The British Parking Awards

Ferguson says Rafael closed his eyes and conjured up some Samba magic

Sir Alex Ferguson joked that Rafael must have had his eyes closed when he spectacularly volleyed Manchester United into the lead at QPR.

= Samba closed his eyes and conjured up some Rafael magic

It either speaks volumes for the wealth of talent at Old Trafford or shows that Sir Alex Ferguson is fallible but Dimitar Berbatov continues to cut a classic football figure on the banks of the River Thames.

The Bulgarian striker, 32, sold by Manchester United for £5million last summer, combines the silky elegance of a rumba dancer with the deadly strike of a cobra, qualities which enable him to celebrate his 200th Premier League game in the grand manner.

http://i.minus.com/ihtCRiKfbnx61.gif

i have missed the particular joy cisse brings to lashing em in

Sweet. And I thought Tevez' was a good hit.

Must say I hadn't realised that Chelsea were right back in the pack now. Huge game for the Spurs tomorrow.

some decent goals this weekend

fuckin stoke jesus christ ban these sick cunts

lmao did u notice shearer laughing while saying the linesman 'wouldn't get out of there alive'

1) Giving thanks for Rodwell

In the post-match briefing after Manchester City had beaten Chelsea 2-0 Roberto Mancini opened up by saying: "One thing I want to say first is that for us today is the last Sunday for our Pope and I would like to say thank you to this Pope for what he did in eight years ago. Thank you very much." As Pope Benedict XVI walks off into the papal sunset and the Italian spends this week offering a prayer that Manchester United will finally slip up to allow City to close the 12-point gap, Mancini can offer thanks for the performance of Jack Rodwell in a first start since 1 September. His was a barnstorming, all-action display that was launched from the holding berth but which had him marauding all over the Etihad grass to suggest that Rodwell, at still only 21, has the potential to perform like an English Yaya Touré. Jamie Jackson

swansea's team is going to be dismantled this summer.
what a damn shame.

I would guess that Swansea are run well enough that they don't have to sell, and I would say that only Michu can step up to a Big Club, and even then, he'll warm the bench at Bayern or something. The rest of the squad is more about working hard, keeping shape and possession and taking chances, no? Swansea have clawed their way into being a mid-table Premiership club, players won't take a sideways move, and I don't think a move "upwards" would be on the cards. As much as I like Dyer, I can't see that any of the clubs above Swansea in the table would want him, or even be improved by him (lol Chelsea excepted).

Ashley Williams is being linked to Spurs/Pool/Arsenal quite a bit.

Most of their players would get a raise out of a move

Swansea would make significant profit on any move

they'd feel confident that their repeated success at identifying and integrating store brand players demonstrates that they could sell without the same effect that idk villa losing benteke would likely have

they're not established in their position, so still a wee bit of a shop window club at this level

Ashely Williams was linked with Liverpool before the January window too - I remember lots of stories of the 'how will Suarez feel playing in the same team as him after what he said' type.

I hadn't realised it was Spurs v 'nal on Sunday. I was going to be all 'biggest seven days since x blah blah', which is kinda true but doesn't allow for inherent talent for screwing up. Big week for AVB though.

Great bantuh btwn big sam and little dre in the lead up

Crikey, Roy looking kinda Nazilike in that coat & weirdo headcocking thing

Booing Scott Parker isn't really justified, is it? At least they managed to not boo Bobby Moore for his time at Fulham.

Moronic challenge from Parker, he should get panned for that.

Partic as he's the player should be out stoppin that cross

walker's lost a yard of pace the past while, whats with that

how's Adebayor missed that

Spurs deserve this

Fuckin adebayor fuckin vertonghen fuckin dawson fuckin parker

This is getting silly. They're not miraculous saves, but there're about 5,000 of them.

oh man

actual shouting going on here

That last 15 mins is the best we've played in weeks, carroll and livermore in!

what a winner, felt for jussi

And yeah my neighbours are gonna be writin letters

AVB is so damn likeable

He was like a tiger purring when they cut to him there

yeah his media persona during his time at spurs anyway (didnt catch a lot of him at chelsea) has always been v open and relaxed.

Can someone post a GIF of that Bale winner? I am out and missed the whole game.

http://i.minus.com/idZxnlXZwOjad.gif

otm

inevitability, thy name is bale winding one up

Premier League clubs who need a new manager, take note! Schhteeeve McClaren is available again! He quit at Twente having not won a single match in 2013 and playing the most terrible football imaginable.

Some nice moments to remember:
- He's been the subject of mockery so much for his cliché heavy post-match talks. "Eh, that'sch football," would be his response to virtual any question, result or criticism. It's become a meme here.
- Whenever they'd draw 0-0 against relegation candidates, Schteve would praise his team for keeping a "clean sheet", much to dismay of the fans. Two weeks ago the fans were so fed up it, they came into the stadium ten minutes after kick off, so we could all see this as their protest:

http://static0.ad.nl/static/photo/2013/13/12/12/20130226093143/media_xll_1543782.jpg

RIP Schteve you will be missched for your sheer trolling. As you were.

Valuable info imo

Terry insisted as recently as last weekend that there was no rift between him and the manager, comments which helped to shore up Benítez’s position in the eyes of more moderate supporters.

I'm all for mutiny at the Bridge, but the gravitas implicit in this genre of reporting is pretty ridiculous. It's like the Brownites and the Blairites grappling, only this time the constituency is even more cowed and inconsequential.

Meanwhile in the eyes of the Stamford Bridge extremists the Rafa jihad continues.

http://www.guardian.co.uk/football/blog/2013/feb/26/universally-popular-footballers-team-likable-players?CMP=twt_gu&CMP=EMCFTBEML853
Some odd selections there. I don't think Spurs fans would agree with the description of Berbatov, the manner in which he left Tottenham has been conveniently ignored. Equally, I'm not convinved by the logic of the BAE inclusion.

Everyone loves berbatov swap him for adebayor we'd win the world cup

BAE has nestled into 'cult hero' status fairly comfortably over the past couple of seasons. The afro helped.

I've not met a Spurs fan who doesn't still love Berbatov, we'd have had him back in a shot. He's still more popular among Spurs fans than United fans.

Not including Iniesta, the most likeable footballer of all time, is st8 challops though. Although maybe not if you're a Madrid fan.