Moneyball won't win the Premiership 2012-13

£6,500,000 over 5 years for getting fat. Dude is living the dream, imho. I guess that's the trouble if you let yourself get that out of form after injury while on a ridiculous contract at a club that's spending hundred's of millions signing the best players from around the world. You're not a sellable asset, and you're never going to make the first team. Might as well just enjoy the cash, and maybe get yourself an NVQ in painting and decorating for when the contract ends.

so you can wallpaper your own penthouse with money

i've been looking at the citeh forums (jesus) and nobody seems to know anything, there are posts from when he was actually playing saying his attitude then was shit, and there's suggestion of serious difficulties with alcohol/depression/gambling

apparently he doesn't have to report to casa del etihad and they are just waiting for the contract to expire

he was seriously talented though, other than wilshere the most talented young english central midfield prospect, nick powell reminds me of him a bit (not trying to curse him)

it's quite striking how cursory glances at different forums for the big clubs reveal them to be dreadful in quite distinctive ways

rawk is obviously special but citeh fans seem to have notably low levels of literacy and patience (see also manchester evening news commentboxes) and ars5n4l m4ni4 is every bit as petty, indignant and precious as it ought to be

villatalk is quite fun these days watching them struggle to comprehend new realities

transfer threads where arturo vidal and karl henry nudge shoulders

newcastle fora are obviously a hilarious treasure right now as they take to arsenal's ineffable higher grounds, they'll have no mercenaries sullying the good toon name no sir

Michael Johnson, once tipped as an England international and one of the best young players to emerge through Manchester City's academy in the past decade, has been paid off from his contract after the club finally ran out of patience with him.

Johnson, convicted of two drink-driving offences last September, was offered a severance package from his £40,000-a-week contract just before Christmas, after several years of decline. The club decided not to announced it publicly but it has come to light now after a photograph of the 24-year-old appeared on the internet looking bloated and unfit.

is he salavageable at any other club?

I'm sure if he can skinny down for the summer someone will take a misguided punt on him at half the wage.

like for like Lampard replacement

prolly still be pretty handy for our 5-a-side team

can cover the entire goal it's only tiny

idk if this was going to happen it was going to happen in lancashire, home of crash dieting bantuh ledge ricky hatton and freddie flintoff who recently said he was in better shape for his novelty boxing appearance than during his entire cricket career

and twp obv

well i dinner wanna say

5 yrs at 40k pw to get fat & stocious drunk on the reg no doubt

ppl who have figured out how to live

That Eriksson-era City side was one of the most talented-but-flakey teams I can remember.

Except Didi Hamann obviously.

I'd like to see them contest a run-in with Keegan's Newcastle, Bowles' QPR; blood everywhere and clinical competence be damned. Maybe add some late-era Wenger.

http://static.guim.co.uk/sys-images/Sport/Pix/pictures/2013/1/15/1358260760268/Sven-Goran-Eriksson--008.jpg

Sven-Goran Eriksson joins the coaching staff of 1860 Munich
• 'He is a coach of the world,' says the club's chief executive

what fixtures have The World got lined up then?

Didn't he actually coach The World against Gordon Ramsay/Robbie Williams XI?

http://i1199.photobucket.com/albums/aa469/kasper36/Newcastle%20United%20FC%20-%20The%20Animated%20Series/qpr.gif

nice

Easy fixture:

http://ia.media-imdb.com/images/M/MV5BMTkwNTczNTMyOF5BMl5BanBnXkFtZTcwNzUxOTUyMw

http://www.cinemotions.com/data/films/1018/91/1/affiche-Scott-Pilgrim-vs-the-World-2009-1.jpg

home park's always a tough ground to go to in fairness

Ugh.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tsZzkxGs9hM

http://www.telegraph.co.uk/sport/football/teams/queens-park-rangers/9801632/Joey-Barton-and-former-Liverpool-and-Man-City-midfielder-Dietmar-Hamann-in-frankly-hilarious-Twitter-altercation.html

Hilarious, and according to someone on a famous gossip website entire true re the financial situation of one of them.

The same site also suggests the reason Fat Frank, Cashley and EBJT haven't been given new contracts is because Abramovitch blames them for making AVB's position untenable.

hamann was doing the confessional shite wrt gambling last year

hes probably famous enough that he could make a quarter million a year just lingering around fitba / tv studios / afterdinner circuit, even if he has squandered the big money already

would dearly love the Abramovitch/AVB stuff to be true but can't see it

The Telegraph is as trustworthy a source on Chelsea as there is imo.

Except for the fan fiction stuff, that's a nonsense. They splashed the Ballon d'Or last week with a 'Chelsea snubbed' headline iirc.

I dunno - I reckon Abramovich is probably looking at what AVB's done so far with Spurs and thinking he might have been too hasty, but my guess would be that he sees the three of them as obstacles to change and when push came to shove he wasn't prepared to back AVB to push through that change if meant losing their Champions League status in the process.

One year on and it's only really Lampard who looks like he might genuinely be missed, the old guard has declined in relevance very rapidly, everyone can see it's Hazard and Mata who are the key players now.

Found the same story elsewhere from a Chelsea fan site, posted over the weekend (but with Essien instead of EBJT).

What's going to happen with Oscar? Criminal if that boy gets turned into an occasional sub.

in Rafaland, everybody's an occasional sub

One year on and it's only really Lampard who looks like he might genuinely be missed, the old guard has declined in relevance very rapidly, everyone can see it's Hazard and Mata who are the key players now.

― Matt DC, Tuesday, 15 January 2013 18:54 (1 minute ago)

that is nearly as fickle as the guardian's talkingpointstastic '10 things we learned' column which makes grand proclamations based on 90 minutes

lampard is not a starting quality cm, ashley cole as well as being a more conventionally skilled player for his position, is still in very good physical condition and is two years and half years younger

mata and hazard are another thing

I note Coutinho's being hawked about atm, he's another victim.

as a squad player it would be worth keeping lampy wamps around, the finality of this decision does suggest abramovich feels slighted and the avb mutiny is a likely reason

abramovich allowed lampard to spend his honeymoon on one of his yachts, apart from shevchenko he is the only chelsea player that seemed to have that personal relationship with him

countinho had his breakthrough in rafa's strangely cavalier inter side

also biabany, now of parma iirc

Lampard probably isn't starting quality but he's still scoring regularly. Cole's head tends to go down for months at a time and he isn't the player he was - left backs don't exert that much influence on the team and even ones of Cole's quality are replaceable if you have Chelsea's kind of money.

yeah, Leighton Baines probly isn't that dear

yeah anyone can pick up an elite level fullback for a few quid, which is why chelsea have spent about £70m on ferreira, johnson, bouhlarouz, bosingwa, ivanovic, azpilicueta, wallace etc

baines is 28 and not that fast, he will decline within a couple of years and isn't as good a defender as cole

they will probably go in for coentrao

also whatever shitty music ashley cole likes and skintight d&g james dean t-shirts >>>>>>> whatever shitty clothes leighton baines wears and miles kane

Ivanovic is a pretty great right-back I think, good enough at least.

Wonder whether Ashley Cole visibly lying through his teeth at the JT enquiry might have something to do with it as well, but I doubt Abramovich is a man to worry about such trifling concerns, it's possibly that he's a poisonous presence in the squad.

yeah i rate ivanovic at rb but he and cahill are probably their most reliable cb partnership

Baines was a joke mostly, I'd still argue he's the better English left back at this point in their respective careers but obv not really a Chelsea target