Just when you thought it was safe - OK CUPID PART 3: The Return of the WOO!

we need to doxx m@x read in response

http://www.okcupid.com/flat/media/img/emails/endoftheworld.jpg

go out with a bang!

we're screwed. you should be too!

I'll fuckin... I'll fuckin... sew your asshole closed and keep feedin you and keep feedin you

Oh I'm under no misapprehension the page is actually *private*. I dunno I just think its rude. Its my thing.

pretty much pro public shaming in any context

like bring back being pelted with rotten fruit while in the stocks in my opinion

Feel like the slippery slope is a concept that is rapidly fading from collective human consciousness these days. Good thing the world is over tomorrow.

nooo they be takin my slippery slopes

if you've ever done anything on the internet you probably deserve to be shamed

http://i.imgur.com/KU2YH.jpg

proving my point

i'm gonna die and that .jpg is still gonna be on the internet

pretty sure i've posted about this before, but true story:

in 2006 my work computer crashed and it had to get sent from hawaii to chicago for our corporate IT people to fix/re-image. when the new computer got shipped back, i was really sad to see that the 5 or 10 gigs of MP3s i'd had on it were not there, and yet all of my internet explorer bookmarks were preserved, including that image (which i had no memory of ever seeing, let alone bookmarking).

there is a series of m3g4cyc1es posts originally from someone called d3r3k or d3nn1s or something which display this sort of commingled sadsack ingratiaion / visceral hatred much more acutely and hilariously, but then within his admittedly minor field of voyeur-tumblr curatorship bh is the emperor of all he surveys

Far more insidious than these dudes who kinda nakedly wear their misogyny on their sleeves are the dudes who display textbook PUA tendencies and which I'm given to understand are plentiful on OKC. I feel like there needs to be an anti-PUA pamphlet to pass out to all single women who aren't hip to their tactics.

I am completely open to people being very well-educated about PUA signifiers, but I feel that this would do little beyond educating a small naive audience that is also likely to have other illusions about human relationships. I think the behaviors encapsulated therein are encouraged, if not nurtured, by people who need or are interested in obvious signifiers and customs in their dating. I probably have my own detestable things I look for and cultivate in myself, but they're just not seen as bad in my crowd.

There are probably people who look at their pictures and comments that have been posted to that site, or women who read them, and wonder what the big deal is. For all we know, some women have sought out the fedora-wearers after seeing them on there. Or men are making such profiles knowing the site exists -- it's still publicity.

never done this type of thing but can i just ask if it's standard ton put up a fried egg preference or what?

Yeah, I understand "cooked by you and brought to me on a platter" is a popular choice with some dudes.

hardly gets to the heart of the matter tho

So today a girl from OK Cupid tried to give me a Friend with Benefits Contract.

Consistent Friend with Benefits: Fundamentals

1. 1 You cannot fall for me.

a. If you have any strong feelings for me consult with me immediately we will resolve the issue

b. If I find out before you tell me yourself, I will leave, no warning, no explanation.

2. 2 I am your ---- buddy, no one else’s, (mutual)

a. We are not “serious”, however I do not sleep with more than one person at a time and neither will you

b. If you are interested in someone else you must let me know we will end it. If I find out you slept with someone else while with me, it is over you will regret it.

3. 3No room for jealousy

a. You are not allowed to be jealous of people I am hanging out with, people hitting on me, or ex-boyfriends/gf.

b. If you find yourself second guessing whether you are jealous or not let me know again if you do show any sign of jealousy it will end abruptly

4. 4No ---- left behind

a. You will not, nor will I, leave any belongings at each other’s houses, cars, or friends’ houses. No “her/his drawer”, No spare toothbrush, no hygienics,

b. I will leave room for accidents, if you unintentionally leave something at the others home, car, etc. you have 24 hours to retrieve it or let them know if they can discard it.

5. 5 No arguing

a. I will accept debates heated conversation and playful banter. As long as one or the other have no hard feelings

b. If you make the other scream, harsh, cry, etc. the relationship will end, abruptly there is no room for error

6. 6 ---- buddy is different than booty call

a. Every time we have sex we need to be hanging out before and after the deed is done. Cuddling is mandatory pillow talk is optional.

b. If there is a reason you cannot hang out or cannot stay afterwards discuss it, 3rd strike and you are out btw.

c. I do not come to your beck and call we decide mutually.

found that.

cool how Wes Anderson character's are finding their way into the real world

Yeah there's no way thats a real person.

If you have any strong feelings for me consult with me immediately we will resolve the issue

what a fun discussion

We are not “serious”, however I do not sleep with more than one person at a time and neither will you

This is totally not what a fuckbuddy is, what the hell is wrong with this person.

http://gs1.wac.edgecastcdn.net/8019B6/data.tumblr.com/11df218356565c55f68fe77b51b4afed/tumblr_mfbbrfUmUl1s11bbpo1_400.jpg

thank christ i still inhabit a normal country

we'll see about that.

oh sorry, meant to post that to the guns and fried egg threads tbh

anyone experiencing a new year surge on these sites? feel like i'm getting loads of adds/messages on the guardian site lately, and from quite attractive people, without even having changed my pics.

Your profile was probably featured.

Eight people viewed my profile within the span of fifteen minutes on NYE, so I figured something was up. No new messages or anything, though. Whatevs.

looking for a last minute NYE date?

Two dates set up for my return to CA. Can't drum up any enthusiasm, but also can't continue being so damn picky.

been messaging one girl in particular whom i really like, she added me last week. was due to go on a date tomorrow but she rearranged to monday cos she's ill. obv that's the typical online dating fizzle-out, but later on in the same message she was quite effusive about wanting us to meet and was really direct about me and my appearance and stuff, very unusual for these sites, i hardly knew how to respond!

could actually be something worthwhile as we've been having really good conversations about music and movies. i had basically ignored any/all online profiles since a really anti-climactic date around july or august.

Yeah, man, there are a lot of germs floating around out there right now. I'm pretty relaxed about illness-induced date delays in the wintertime (particularly as I've had to do that myself).

and was really direct about me and my appearance and stuff, very unusual for these sites, i hardly knew how to respond!

"Really direct" how? It might be a gay male thing, but guys I talk to online are not reluctant to get into specifics about looks (specific compliments or how I compare w/ their type).

I think that might mostly be a gay male thing, unfortunately. The world of hetero courtship is far more often a labyrinth of insecure second-guessing and hesitant half-steps.

Well, that explains why my messages of "your breasts are way slammin', can I buy you a latte" are not working

do you follow that up with "you look good, let's get to rammin'?"

depends on the latte

The latest message I got was one last week that started with, "You're a handsome man." I decided that I don't want to say stuff like that to start off with, and it isn't my top choice of incoming first message, either. However, forgoing such messages has meant a decline in the number of guys I contact.

The previous to last message I got from a guy said, "Hey man u lking? I'm horned up."

U str8z shd try that approach.

you are failing because the phrase is in fact "hecka slammin'"

I get skeevy "u look good wanna massage?" shit a bit, they get the instant ban hammer from me.

"Really direct" how? It might be a gay male thing, but guys I talk to online are not reluctant to get into specifics about looks (specific compliments or how I compare w/ their type).

i think any comment on physical appearance is rare enough ime on these sites, tho maybe that is typical of hetero exchanges. (not that i doubt loads of guys send "i want to bone u" or whatever)

it wasn't like racy or whatever, just she said i had sexy eyes, in a bit more detail than that. it probably sounds slightly lol to act as if that's a big deal but in the world of the online dating site it sort of is... i really had to think about how to respond in kind without sounding cheesy.

we'd already been messaging for a bit and i think it was her way of showing that rearranging tomorrow to monday wasn't out of disinterest. i actually quite like her style, better to both be clear you think each other is hot rather than going on a date with somebody whose motivations are vague even to themselves (and these sites are full of that.)

I get more generic 'you have nice eyes' type comments, and they're tricky to respond to. I always get the feeling that the person thinks they ought to be saying something like that, regardless of whether or not they particularly like my eyes (I'm sure some of them actually do). I pretend they haven't said it. They can make their mind up about me, my eyes, and the rest of me if/when they meet me. Hmmm, I seem to be a total curmudgeon on this site in a way I'm generally not.

Once I went on a date with someone who had listed his dark and piercing eyes as a good feature . He kept his shades on until we'd walked about 10 mins and sat down on a bench, then dramatically took them off. They were indeed dark and piercing. I'm not sure what he expected me to do.

yeah my experience is on a diff site. i've never really had a good experience on okcupid.

lg fwiw i don't think irl couples ever have good discussions about movies or music so this sounds like it won't go anywhere imo but gl

^twaddle fyi

protip imo