Innocuous things that make you irrationally angry (a list thread)

We're both going to get hit by cars later today and jerks on the internet will point to those posts as reasons why we deserved.

I'm a big fan of scooping up my kids and jaywalking with them, since they're not quite adept enough to do it on their own.

But then, there are crosswalks where I live, with signs saying it's state law to yield to pedestrians, yet cars do ... not ... stop.

We're both going to get hit by cars later today and jerks on the internet will point to those posts as reasons why we deserved.

"this never would have happened if they had cars themselves."

But then, there are crosswalks where I live, with signs saying it's state law to yield to pedestrians, yet cars do ... not ... stop.

oh god oh god the intersection in front of our apartment is crazy busy (well one street is crazy busy, the other is nearly deserted) and there's a crosswalk and a sign, but the lines on the street are nearly faded away and NOBODY sees the sign or stops. I have harangued my alderman so many times via every method of communication possible and that piece of shit has never even responded to me. I have to cross the crazy busy street to get to my bus stop and even if I'm doing the terrifying "cross halfway and look imploringly at drivers going in the opposite direction" nobody stops. Unless I actually put my hand up like a crossing guard, then they usually stop, but I hate being reduced to such things.

My neighbors probably know me as "that woman who is always yelling 'It's a cross walk! You have to stop BY LAW! FUCK YOU YOU FUCKING ASSHOLE!' in the mornings."

People are so irrationally angry about the fact that bike lanes or pedestrian walkways exist sometimes! I don't get it. The city had not yet painted the crosswalk in one location but there were large yellow signs on both sides of the roadway and a button you could push that would make lights on both signs blink. I push button, begin crossing with a car about a block back and you would have thought I'd insulted the driver's mother by the amount of rage I saw.

you guys should just get cars and drive everywhere

Thinking about it.

love walking too much xpost

I don't want a car! It's expensive and a pain in the ass and neither one of us likes driving so we'll just argue about who has to do it every time we need to go anywhere.

Just buy a cheap broken down car and park it in the crosswalk. Crossing problem solved!

they finally replaced the Crosswalk of Death by my house! For years it had just been tiny flashing lights embedded in the blacktop, halfheartedly painted lines and a whole lot of misplaced trust in the ability of drivers to Do The Right Thing. This on a four lane arterial road (two lanes each way) by a hospital with a fuckton of pedestrian traffic. I saw SO many people almost die on a daily basis, it was a horrible, horrible crosswalk. They repaved the road a few months back and took the whole thing out...so for a while there was nothing at all (of course pavlovian dogs of idiots would try to cross there anyway. wtf. sorry, you're dead.) This month they FINALLY put in a beautiful fully operational crosswalk! Giant overhead traffic lights that stay off until the person activates the crosswalk then the lights start flashing and then stay red until the person has crossed! And painted lines and the whole nine yards. I don't even cross on it myself but I'm so overjoyed that I don't have to watch pedestrians risk their lives anymore.

Fuck cars. I would have 2 cars right now if other people knew how to fucking drive. I've only been in 2 major accidents and both of them i was rear-ended by a idiot driver that totaled my car. Both on the same road, in fact.

No one says "jan" or "feb" out loud, that is ridiculous and wrong. It's like when someone says a word out loud that they have only read previously and comically mispronounce it, e.g. "paradiggum"

Man, I'm not comprehending well this morning. You're right. I thought the OP was referring to "Jan." in writing.

Chicago has installed a lot of signs in the middle of streets in crosswalks with little stop signs that say that under IL law, cars must stop for pedestrians, and it really works. I love it.

I am pretty aggressive with drivers that seem like they're not going to stop. When I see a car that's looking like it's not going to stop, I make a point of walking right out in front of it (not in a dangerous way) so they have to slam on their brakes. Fuckers.

Fuck drivers and fuck pedestrians.

They should ban cars and just having moving walkways all over the city like they do at the airport.

Maybe I'll just move in to O'Hare.

I don't find someone saying Jan so annoying, but abbreviating any of the other months definitely is.

what's wrong with abbreviating Jan. ??? who cares?

months you should be able to shorten with no IA:
Jan.
Feb.
Sep.
Oct.
Nov.
Dec.

kind of pushing it:
Mar.
Apr.
Aug.

don't even think about it:
May (to M.)
Jun.
Jul.

welp. those are the rules.

Jan'ry

I get IA when months are not consistently shortened - Jan-June would kill me. Three characters, or all characters.

agreed

you guys should just buy cars and abbreviate all months all the time but use irregular month abbreviation lengths

i will drive over anyone who fails to consistently abbreviate all months

YOU'RE ALL ON NOTICE

Jan, Feb, Mar, Apr, May, Jun, Jul, Aug, Sep, Oct, Nov, Dec, Sma

http://25.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_m07hwwhVlR1qcbx7lo1_500.png

We could have 2-letter appreviations if not for those bastard months march, may, june, and july!

abreviations, even!

Gollum: "Hot, Ready and Smeagol!" (Phil D.)

LOL

JA
FEBR
MARC
A
MAYY
JU
JU 2
ARGH
S
O
NO-V
DECEMB

Ugh, every once in a while you see those fiscal year calendars and the like that have the months abbreviated like J F M Ap Ju J Au S O N D and those are just some bullshit.

hot sauce bottles that make some kind of joke about how your ass is going to hurt as a result of their use.

http://www.hotsauceplanet.com/humorous-funny-hot-sauces-snacks-s/72.htm?searching=Y&sort=5&cat=72&show=100&page=1

16-month Calendars.

Like, who buys a calendar in July and just sits patiently staring at the same page for four months? "Can't wait until January to look at that SNOW SCENE!"

You could say, "it's more of a reference in case you wanted to see what the date was on Labor Day blab blah blah" but then it would make more sense to give the extra four months to January-April of the next year, since sometimes, it takes awhile to get around buying another calendar.

TV Guide should publish the last four days from the last issue, just in case you wanted to go back and check to see who played in the afternoon game on CBS.

JFMApJuJAuSON

x-p
I've always assumed those were going-away-to-college calendars.

I'm just going to start buying calendars for my kids beginning next month. That way, when they get to college, they can bring their calendar from home and not have to look at some low-rent 4-on-1 page for their first semester.

I can hear my daughter's excuse now: "I missed my Calc class because the numbers on my calendar were really small."

the 16-monthers don't do 4-on-1-page for Sep-Dec, do they? I've only seen them with 16 full page months. They're also usful for teachers to hang in their classrooms, that way they preserve the continuity and don't confuse the students with a switch in Jan.

This is the first calendar I had on hand to use:

http://i612.photobucket.com/albums/tt203/pplains/12-16.jpg

Pretty much lines up with every other 16-monther I've seen.

I guess I've never really looked at many of them, but I remember them having 16 pages. Next time I'm in Barnes & Noble . . .

I want to key every car that parks or idles or stops in the bike lane.

Had a bicycle coming at me in my outside lane, on a five-lane avenue.

Had to dodge some guy setting out tools on a balustrade on the interstate.

I didn't kill anyone today, so pat me on the back for being such a safe driver.

http://fridayfunnylol.files.wordpress.com/2012/03/allstatestand.png

"Good job, pplains."

When you open a 2-DVD set and Disc 1 is on the right hand side.

the messi goals compilation some worthless degenerate has made that is linked everywhere today and has a distorted cropped/stretched aspect ratio despite the original material all being widescreen

Once again, store workers who don't know what the fuck they're talking about, but who don't let that stop them from explaining everything. Current instance: When I brought my jigsaw in to Home depot, the power tools guy told me:

- The blade holder (shank) was the "T" type, which you could tell b/c "You see this part right here [a part that was NOT the shank] is shaped kinda like a T." He was fucking wrong, and I bought the wrong blades.

- I returned the blades and asked for help finding the right ones, and they called him to help, again. He told me, no, those are right, and they did fit into the shank. I said, no, they don't, and when I sawed, the blade came right out. He said the saw was probably just too old, and they didn't make blades for it anymore. ;sdkfjWF;KJL

I asked someone else, who opened the packages and tested them until he found me the right blades.

home depot is a vaccuum of helpfulness. which is insane bcz what kind of store has more ppl asking for help than hardware stores

i hate the staff there so much i want to run at them whenever i see them

idiots

Isn't their advertising tagline "You've got questions, we've got answers"?

OTOH, I was amazed the other day when I heard a Target employee giving very thorough and accurate counsel on their LCD and LED TVs to a customer.

Uh, I've heard that thorough and accurate business and it was obviously a script. A somewhat less-than-bright Target employee was trying to be helpful when my friend and I were picking up a blu-ray player for a present and it was excruciatingly bad. "Most newer tvs have HDMI now, it does video and sound" and despite our indications we knew what we were doing and my friend's constant sarcastic rejoinders he would not leave us alone.

In the hands of a more nuanced salesperson, the sales guide may have been less of a hindrance

Bleh. Well it sounded good. She was explaining what refresh rates were. I think in this case she might have just happened to be knowledgeable b/c she was like a TV enthusiast or something.

I just remembered another Home Depot idiot. I asked for wood-hardener (to make semi-rotted wood firm up so you could put nails or screws into it) and he "explained" to me that there was no such thing b/c once wood was rotted, it was useless, but it sounded like this "wood hardener" would be nice, if it existed. (It exists and it is pretty nice.)