suicide

nhex, I know that this sounds pretty contrived and disingenuous coming from some rando on the internet, but I think youre a cool dude and I offer whatever I can of my sympathies and echo what's been said above

y'know when you get worryingly close to there only being one answer to your problems?

No, thank god/the fates/your own personal attributable source.

Fb?

in a bit. i'm sorry i'm such a fucking drama king. i dunno what i'm saying. just right out at the end of meself i guess.

Thread for it tbh, i think nobody's likely to call you out.

i was gonna list all the reasons but i didn't want it to become an invitation for anybody to play Cap'n Save-a-FatNarcissistDrunk so suffice it to say that i'm just coherent enough to remember that disappearing is an unacceptably dick move for a parent but i feel like the only way i can maintain credibility with anybody is by opening veins

it can sometimes seem like an answer but it isn't much of one tbh, especially given it tends to involve kicking your problems on to exactly the people you don't want to kick your problems on to.

no. there are always as many answers as you might need. seriously, the absence you're talking about is an artifact of distorted perception, not reality. everything that's happening to you eventually becomes just some shit that once happened to you. all it takes is time. i wish there was something meaningful i could say, some real support i could offer, but this is the internet, and i don't know you personally. all i can say is that you seem like an amazing person, i love your presence here, and you can't let the blackness of a moment overwhelm you. talk to someone like now, regardless of how little you imagine they want to hear it.

I think a lot of people know what it feels like. The trick is to remember that sometimes you don't feel like that, and focus on not doing anything until you've got any other feeling other than this one.

xpost oops, I am playing Cap'nSaveANoodle. Tough shit.

i'm really sorry guys i can't stop blubbing i hate myself it's just that youse answer back more than the fucking samaritans

and, you know, i was having the exact same thought about credibility just a few days ago! but right now i am in the space of "jesus but credibility is a shallow thing to think about, i am seriously worried about being sufficiently convincing at a time like this, who would i even be trying to prove it to", which is a comeback that works for me personally.

Yeah i was gonna go for capn hat but tbf you were only ever gonna be absurdly ungracious

speaking as a fat, narcissistic, (for the moment ex) drunk i mean. i've done shit to my life and loves you wouldn't believe. i've awakened in bushes, lived out of doors, betrayed a thousand hopes. in the here and now, none of that matters, though. all that matters is what i do next, and that's always mine to choose. same goes for you. no matter how shitty you feel now, feel you've always been, you're gonna be someone else next year, and there is absolutely no reason to feel bad about that.

going a little too hard with the "helping" thing, sorry, but this hits p close to home

someone else next year...

i don't get that, life drags on forever

xp to self
like, frankly, the fuckers who you can imagine not giving you credence right now? probably would not give you credence no matter what you did. because they are constructed of a complete absence of humanity. So they are the absolute worst choice of people whose opinions you should be worrying about.

thank you all. sorry for this.

no worries, shit is hard enough at best

That fuckin cartoon last week has muddled the advice game something rotten imo.

NV i missed you round the place lately and would miss you intolerably if that became a permanent situation. Think of those of us who donated to the funding in good faith

i read this recently and it kinda helped, for me? 7 don’t kill yourself tips.

i guess it's time to sit down and list problems and consider how they can be sensibly resolved.

keep getting roaring in my head like Caligula in I Claudius or like any thick addict i guess

and c# you're right, crazy thinking, the only people i want to "convince" are the people who wdn't understand the message

well i mean you also kind of want to convince yourself? the worst and most cruel part of yourself.

it is very hard to tell yourself: what i am feeling is real and it is bad enough as it is, there's always a bit of you that wants to up the ante.

nb NV u've got fb mail

who are you trying to convince dude? it sucks but the vast majority of people don't get it and never will. probably better for humanity in general, i guess

i guess it's time to sit down and list problems and consider how they can be sensibly resolved.

yeah, this. helps to keep your focus on problems with concrete limits & solutions.

xpost to sellllllf

but the thing is, it is bad enough. it is horrible.

i get told "be kind to yourself" and i think: fuck you, being kind to myself is what has got me into this, why am i so self-indulgent, why am i cutting myself all this slack that i do not deserve. but the fact is that it's not really being kind to yourself if you're constantly going "well frankly this so-called sadness that you claim to find so incapacitating is utterly unconvincing, you are even shit at being incapable of coping."

so that's a thing you can do, i guess. Let it be true that it has been hard for you. That could even help you with listing and thinking about your problems: you don't think "well i could have fixed this if i was not a dipshit about x", you think "it has been hard for me to do this, so what can i change to make this problem more approachable".

on which note, i have been putting off ringing my GP for an hour, so.

Aw, yall great. C# is right - the times this thread DOESN'T get bumped are the times we must fear most. Keep reaching, don't doubt yourself for it; it's part of the cure.

yo, NV... i don't know what to say, but i love you man, just hope that you can work out yr problems, for us, thanks

yeah stay strong mate, this bit of the web wouldn't be the same without you.

noodle i know it might not be enough that ghosty fairy people on the interwebs want to keep you around...but i agree with everyone itt.
there's only one noodle vague. a sincere thoughtful gentleman who has a remarkable way with words. i don't want your dark night of the soul to be forever...but selishly i want you to have a long story. this isn't nearly long enough, noodle. i love ya, sir

thanks VG, thanks everybody. i just needed to get these horrible feelings out in the open where everybody could remind me how horrible they are. thanks for being around, ghosty fairy people.

you should stay here with us, that's what i have to say

well otherwise you'd have to post that fricking Blink 182 video dude

:)

lol

ilx:

http://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/File:Cottingley_Fairies_1.jpg

ilx:
http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/en/7/71/Cottingley_Fairies_1.jpg

those are the evil cannibal fairies right

y

gonna go to bed instead (a motto for lyfe tbh)

you're stuck with us

otm

anyway how else am I going to get lyle pics and ILNFL trash talk

also stfu bumping this thread! you can't do that and then backpedal in the very same post.
cmon dude. don't scare a person like that.

ah, it's ok

Still.

luv

I just learned a childhood friend killed herself three years ago. She was the first girl I ever kissed, and, although as an early adolescent I decided that I was actually in love with another girl, she was the one in the back of my mind I always thought I'd marry. I moved away though, and we never kept in touch (it was the late 1980s, no internet). I heard about her from time to time. She had been one of the best students at school, one of the shining, smart students who promised big things in her future. But there was a darkness in her family; her father was sexist and controlling. I learned he wasn't her actual father; but I never heard who the actual father was. When she was a child he forced her to go on camping trips with a friend, which she hated and didn't want to go on. By the time she was eleven she was protesting highly; my mother convinced her mom that if she didn't want to go on these, maybe there was a reason and she should have to. In high school her boyfriend died and she went into a deep depression. I heard she began moving around. She had some children and got divorced. Her mother died of cancer. Then I never heard from here again. I hit FB regularly searching for her name, as recently as last week. I never thought to ask people we knew in common though. Finally someone wrote me this weekend and sent me an obituary page. Asking around a bit I learned she had taken her own life. She had young children.

I'm so broken about this. My wife is not very understanding, which I get; to her mind, this was someone that I was no longer close to. True. But she signified a very happy time in my life. Our families had been close. She was one of the few people who was always nice to geeky, shy me. She was sweet and she was beautiful. I desperately wish there was something I could have said or done.

sorry man. i don't think there's anything you could have said or done, tho

Question: is there a difference between a suffering individual that "wants to not experience suffering any longer" and one that "wants to now experience not-suffering"? If not, how can any kind of humane suicide be justified? Assisted suicide is very supported it seems.

People's understanding and judgement of what constitutes suffering varies wildly, which makes it unclear... in most assisted suicide cases the people in question have terminal uncurable diseases and/or advanced age. I think people are less likely to support suicide of a physically health person under the age of 70, for example, with the thinking that they the potential time and ability to survive?