Babygirl, unpack yr sweaters and get FABULOUS in FALL gay homo queer &c 2012

way to go, alfred!!

I like every piece of that story, including the part about you being single again.

my own family-acceptance narrative was advanced this week as well, when dustin came to my mom's house for thanksgiving and met everybody - step-dad, younger bros, grandmother, great aunt, etc... even my step-dad, who has been the single opposing force for quite some time, was friendly and civil (if a bit quiet, but that's fine). it was pretty great! dustin felt comfortable enough to take a nap for an hour and a half after dinner. it's all good. all all so very very good.

aw, yall <3

Great story Alfred, everything sounds like it's as good as it can be.

Elmo, congrats.

My bf has been making holiday plans with my relatives via Facebook and whatnot without finding any reason at all to include or bother me with any of it. Yes, this is a good thing.

And yeah, fuck those stupid videos. Everyone--gay, straight, male, female, human--should feel insulted by that shit.

Totally happy for you Alfred but you just reminded me I forgot to say happy birthday to my dad. :(

Glad for Alfred and elmo!

I chatted up 'disappointing gay best friend' at a party once. Pretty hot for a redhead.

thanks, guys!

I haven't even kissed a redhead.

well, it's a good thing I hate accomplished karaoke then?

^ oh is THAT why you wouldn't come hang out in Astoria? There was nothing accomplished about it but also it was a mess of margaritas and grossitude-- not an A+ night. An ambulance for one poor girl, too.

Yay Alfred that's a good story. I think you'll be pleasantly happy to discover that your dad is way cooler with this a year from now than you'd anticipate? I hope so

I am such a fool for redheads and with an Irish accent and disposition it's basically the end

what's an Irish disposition?

and yeah, gingers = A++ wonderful.

great news alfred. pivotal emotional scenes in the future movie of your life~~

(i spent the weekend being cooked for, again. the most incredible seafood chowder on friday, beef wellington for a pot luck birthday dinner on saturday, full-on thanksgiving feast on sunday (his housemate's american).)

Yay Alfred that's a good story. I think you'll be pleasantly happy to discover that your dad is way cooler with this a year from now than you'd anticipate? I hope so

I think so! I've learned enough about diplomacy to accept that his remark about not forcing him to walk out when relatives/friends "reject" me is face-saving, so I didn't protest.

what's an Irish disposition?

Cheerful and talkative in my experience

haha, not in my part o' Jersey!

no fgti, I just don't go out on Sunday nights (much). I wouldn't accuse you of being part of an accomplished karaoke session, that's apparently Alfred's thing.

I think the only ILX witness is sarge, who saw me doing ABC's "The Look of Love."

I'll see you and raise you Bacharach/Dusty Springfield's

My whole office saw me do "Teenage Dream" at the holiday party last winter. It's been a hostile 11 months since.

I'll see you and raise you Bacharach/Dusty Springfield's

oh I can do it too

I haven't tried. I have done "What's New Pussycat?"

Wd probably do a very convincing "Walk On By."

alfred is a fine karaoke singer. you can see a photo of me singing in the new edition of gr80's zine.

oh my god does every gay know every bacharach
i call dibs on san jose

Actually, my most appropriate theme song would be "The Last One To Be Loved."

i have witnessed morbs doing karaoke firsthand fyi

fgti i am always so mad that no karaoke place ever seems to have "are you there (with another girl)"

Holy shit, Alfred, that's an incredible turn of events! I'm really happy for you. You too, Elmo A. Maude bless us, one and all!

Same here, Alfred and Elmo (hi, thread!). I've been lurking for some time and following your tales with interest. I'm still unsure as to when I'll reveal all to my parents. I've already told a bunch of friends, my sisters and some ill-advised crushes, but I don't feel the urge to talk about it much atm, and I don't really want to say much to my parents until I've found someone I want to introduce to them. That's not really a prerequisite, though. P sure they've figured out what's happening, but they're from a quite conservative town, surrounded by conservative people, and I don't really want the news to be widespread just yet. I'm enjoying this thread and wish I weren't halfway across the world from most of you, otherwise it'd be nice to hang out. Would esp. love to karaoke. Hardly ever get the chance here, and the k-bars are fairly underwhelming. Also, it's flattering to see some redhead love - until recent dating/pr0n trawling I hadn't realised there were so many redhead fanciers.

Hi qiquing. Redheads are very nice. There are definitely people who fetishize them - you - but also plenty of people who just appreciate redheads.

ILX is a worldwide plague, so maybe some of us in your area!

xp That's pretty much the line I take with my extended fam. I did the coming out thing with my parents and I mention it casually around my cousins, but I figure my aunts/uncles, grandparents, whoever can just find out when I bring someone to Thanksgiving. Really, the only reason they really haven't is because I haven't found someone I want to bring around the family.

I mean, there's more to this, but I'm not exactly gonna blurt out all and sundry on an intro to thread. But yeah, rev, i'm happy for some of my extended family to know and i know they'd be cool, but there are others who have intimated they know and i don't feel as if it's their business, esp. since they've displayed animosity and hypocrisy that makes me think twice about divulging. Some kind of Irish Catholic shenanigans, repression, pathos and shame, probably.

i call dibs on san jose

elmo an i did a duet on this.

haha yes we did

my go-to karaoke number is TLC's waterfalls, even though i can never do left eye's rap justice so i just dance the interlude

Whoa! Alfred! That's really something. Ditto elmo. 2012's really been a banner year, huh?

Yesterday was officially a month of being single and I met him after class at his apartment to pick up some of my stuff and say hi to the cats (who have grown so much!) and ended up hanging out for an hour and just talking. It was oddly comfortable. Faster than I thought it would be. I'm not moving on emotionally as quickly as him but I really believe we're going to be cool in my gut and not just theoretically. So that's nice, I guess.

It helps that I've been doing pretty well generally with school and eating well and whatnot, although my sleep cycle is still crap. It also helps that the breakup finally made it click for me that while I can care about him and be his friend, I can't (and don't want to) invest more energy into his mental space/stability/etc. than my own anymore.

So yeah. Done being sad. Done laundry. Almost done the semester. Onwards and upwards etc.

I really need to find time for karaoke.

Also, is qiqing new or a new name for an old friend or someone who recently joined us who I missed meeting due to absence?

(p.s. NYC folks - I might come to your city again in early January. I was supposed to spend my three weeks off classes in small town Quebec/the woods with the ex and his family and sitting around my apartment while friends are all home is almost as depressing as spending the whole time in Ottawa with the family, so if I can wiggle the budget I'll try to visit. This time the lack of boy means I'll actually be available for drinks. Keep you posted)

I can't (and don't want to) invest more energy into his mental space/stability/etc. than my own anymore.

i feel like this is a very important lesson, in general, for life.

alfred, fantastic!

hi qiqing!

I don't feel the urge to talk about it much atm, and I don't really want to say much to my parents until I've found someone I want to introduce to them. That's not really a prerequisite, though. P sure they've figured out what's happening

this is exactly what i did/thought... turned out okay

I though Waiting For The Right Time and Waiting For The Right Guy meant unnecessary tension, so when I saw my chance I took it, but I'm loath to give advice on this very point: only you know your parents.

Hi qiqing!!

I love doing "Waterfalls" at karaoke but I only ever want to do the rap part.

Welcome, qiqing!

Hi, guys! Yes, Alex, I'm new here, but as I noted upthread, I've been lurking for some time.

hi there!

qiqing's arrival reminds me that i've been here almost exactly 3 yrs now