Innocuous things that make you irrationally angry (a list thread)

using "absolutely" to indicate assent

"would you like your sandwich toasted?"

"absolutely."

"Indisputably!"

"could i get another beer?"

"apodictically."

I would like it absolutely toasted. Just completely blackened. Scorched bread.

indubitably

axiomatically

aren't those personality similes lifted from stereotypical school reports?

"eargasm"

It's rational enough that the word would make me angry but I had no idea it'd make me so angry, when a smiling girl said it over and over to me about how much she liked something

The only use of 'eargasm' permitted is to describe the mining of one's ear canal with a cotton bud. If someone says that word about a song, shoot them.

No, I think I'll shoot anyone who uses either meaning, thanks.

not so much angry but q-tips pretending to be just for cleaning the exterior of the ear when everyone i know rams it down like they're mining for gold... q-tips, you know what people are using it for, and that's why you sell them. who do you think you're fooling, q-tips?

I had a friend in high school who's mum was kind of obsessed with cleaning her ears, or seemed to be. I swear every time I went over to their house, her Mum would knock on the bedroom door and she'd have to go help her Mum fish the tip of a q-tip out of her ear, because it had come off while she was cleaning it O_o

Multilingual instructions in which each section contains every language, instead of having sections for each language. I.e.:

en English
Instructions
fr Français
Mode d'emploi
es Español
Instrucciones
de Deutsch
Gebrauchsanleitung
nl Nederlands
Gebruiksaanwijzing
it Italiano
Instruzioni
pt Português
Instruções

Bad enough when it's a booklet and you know where to look for your language on each page, but when it's a huge folded up sheet with no apparent beginning nor end, I get frustrated beyond reason.

TBF, I think something is wrong with me right now - probably head cold + medicine - that is making me feel so excruciatingly, desperately upset over this stupid POS instructions sheet.

Last week I had headache while at a show w/ a friend and she gave me a Pamprin and I was shocked at how it really did have a soothing, calming effect, so I bought some, and I just took one b/c I need to be calmed.

Gebruiksaanwijzing patrol

- savages at the grocery outlet who leave their carts just willy nilly on the sidewalk in front of the store, so no-one could actually ever walk on the sidewalk even if they wanted to without shoving 10 carts out of their way

*first empty parking space they spot. one of the things that most annoys me about this is that nobody would ever in a million years think to leave their cart in, I dunno, maybe ONE OF THE SPOTS THAT IS ALREADY OCCUPIED & RENDERED USELESS BY A CART???

I'm not asking y'all to nest the fuckers or anything—heaven forbid!—but a little common sense would go a long way.........

the manufacture of digital cameras without viewfinders.
I had the screen on my last one shatter in a storm back in 2009, I could still use the thing up until I decided to take it apart to fit a new screen back around midsummer this year. So that was pretty much 3 years of my mainly being able to use it cos it had a viewfinder. Apart from the odd occasion where I just pointed it in the right direction without lining it up through the thing.
I'm just annoyed that I wouldn't be able to do that with a new one. & I'm supposed to be picking one as my birthday present.

Just wondering if a camera with built in wi-fi is just gimmicky or if it is the next major development that I'm just not hip to since i don't use a laptop. Since this is one of the choices, a Samsung model
http://www.currys.ie/Product/SAMSUNG-WB150F-Smart-WiFi-Compact-Digital-Camera-Black/312975/174

or if I should go for this thing
http://www.currys.ie/Product/CANON-IXUS-230-HS-Compact-Digital-Camera-Black/312805/174

neither of which has a viewfinder but then nothing below bridge category seems to & I don't think the buyer wants to go that high & it wouldn't fit in my waistcoat pocket anyway.

Any accessory for dogs with a 'bones' or a 'paw prints' motif. JUST BUY A PLAIN BLANKET/BOWL/WHATEVER.

Around here the shopping carts at stores with parking lots have wheels that lock up at the border of the lot to prevent theft, so they never make it to the sidewalk.

the manufacture of digital cameras without viewfinders.

I thought I was the only one pissed about this!

Don't think so, would hope it was more widespread. But apparently screen size leaves no room for them, but that must mean that the act of taking a photo has changed heavily from when they were universal.
Can you successfully line up a photo the same way using the screen? Don't you need distance from the screen that would become counterintuitive to anybody used to taking photos in the old style?

not sure how you do see what your shot is otherwise, can't be very accurate.

around here the shopping trolleys have a €1 or 2 deposit so it would be unlikely that too many people would walk off without reclaiming that, though I do think I've seen them with chains long enough that you can stick the key thingy in the trolley's own slot and therefore not have to park the thing up.

Also most of the ones around here are inside carparks that are owned by the supermarket and have somebody patrolling to get hold of one parked up on the perifery. Trying to think if that means strays or if it is just trolley stands that have several lined up but the main collection point for new trolleys is going to be the actual store entrance

I've got this weird thing about electronic displays – similar to what Ebert says about how movies in the theater are better because you're seeing a projection and not having an actual beam of light directed straight towards you. Maybe the difference between looking at the moon and looking at the sun. It's why I prefer books over eBooks.

But it goes beyond that. With an electronic display, you're no longer seeing your subject with your naked eye. You're taking a picture of something you're seeing on a video screen, not in real life. I get that when we all still used film, the photographs didn't necessarily represent what the photographer saw in real life either, but digital cameras take this idea a step too far.

I use digital cameras. I use my iPhone camera more than anything. I've also adapted to driving cars that you can't roll down the windows of unless the battery is turned on and the death of the television antenna. But I still carry a certain resentment toward digital viewfinders, a tiny little weight that fits in my pocket that hardly anyone can notice at all.

Also, the model of flatscreen television we have has no visible buttons on it. It does have these touch-sensitive areas marked by the most transparent of markings, ones that I have to turn on a light if I want to turn it off at night and can't find the remote. It shouldn't have to be like learning to play a fretless bass to get the menu screen turned off.

Yes. Sort of related: I saw an interview w/ Apple's design guy (the English guy w/ the shaved head) who was explaining why the area w/ the light indicating that power was on should only be visible when the power was on b/c when the power was off, it was irrelevant. So when there was no power, in the area of the light, you see only silver plastic, completely undifferentiated from the silver plastic on the rest of the bezel - no indication that a light would come on there. That is fucking nonsense! If the design is for ~everybody~ in line w/ The Apple Way, then how would a person unfamiliar with that machine know where to look for that light?

because when a computer's on you know you turned it on?

pplains also has a samsung tv?

But that button on a computer would be relevant if it was turned off since, one day, you'll likely want to turn it on again.

And yeah, we've got a Samsung. It's annoying because the light comes on only when it's turned off.

Around here the shopping carts at stores with parking lots have wheels that lock up at the border of the lot to prevent theft, so they never make it to the sidewalk.

oh god please don't make fun of me if this is a dumb question, but how does that work?

IA: people using cardio equipment at the gym who have the TVs on, and heardphones in, and are reading a magazine. How much distraction do you freaking need? If it's that awful to exercise, maybe try to find something that you enjoy more. Also when people have laptops propped up on the treadmills/ellipticals, but that's largely because the thought of reading while bouncing up and down on those items makes me motion sick.

Having to take a shower is making me IA, too. I just want to be showered without having to go through the hassle of actually washing myself.

xpost think invisible dog fence

Join a gym where people aren't allowed to bring that kind of shit in the fitness centre? Swear I would find a way for iPhone to meet deep end of swimming pool or business end of barbell if that person was next to me.

I had no idea such places existed. But I would have to sacrifice the convenience of going to a gym .3 miles from my house and being able to bring my phone and thus Spotify and my painstakingly curated 15-hour workout playlist, so on balance I'll just smdh and come here and complain.

I use my phone on the elliptical.

In college I used to read magazines or class materials on the elliptical, but recently I tried reading on one and getting through a line was a struggle.

oh god please don't make fun of me if this is a dumb question, but how does that work?

This: xpost think invisible dog fence

Or like how exploding ink security devices work. But I couldn't explain how those devices work, so if those comparisons aren't good enough, then I'm sorry. A signal trips a trigger is all I know.

yeah, the computer light isn't on the power button and doesn't share its location -- it's on the outer part of the case, visible when the laptop is closed. Then you can tell if it's not actually turned off, but sleeping -- if it's open, you can tell if it's on by looking at the screen

the treadmill thing is funny -- when I was a kid, I'd be reading a book and watching tv at the same time

grocery stores on rainy days
ppl are MORONS

Holiday season is approaching again, which means I have to attend a lot of musical events because I have a family member who sings semi-professionally. I mean, (relative) is brilliant. Get sick and tired of "slumming it" with his "entourage".

Please, their singing sucks so bad it makes my blood boil. Then I step out for a smoke during your "performance" and get called rude. You've sucked for at least twenty years and I've been nice enough.

why is there always one person on a transatlantic flight who does a continuous walking loop of the aisles, interspersed with enigmatic standing at the front of the plane scanning the crowd of seated passengers....want to hurl my terrible plate of airline food at them

Just had a camera given to me and tried to install the programme to get it to work on my computer only to be told that the program needs a computer resolution higher than the one on my computer.
I think it's the same thing resolution that photoshop's most recent versions have wanted. So where do I go from here. Do I need to buy a new graphics card or something?
This is really stupid, surely it can't dictate that the computer isn't good enough to use with a point & shoot camera can it?
Not sure if I can actually use photos until I can get this software to upload. Bollox.

What resolution is your desktop set to? Is it possible you just have it set at a lower res than possible?

I don't seem to be able to get it to go higher than 800 by 600 pixels and it's asking for 1028 by 768.
Is that a graphics card thing, a screen thing or a type of Windows thing.
I'm still running XP but the camera says it can be run on XP as long as it's service pack 3 which I think I have.

I can't imagine any computer sold that could run XP would max out at that. Do you have an amazingly tiny screen? If not, more than likely you do not have the right graphics card driver installed for your computer.

& my screen is a flatscreen, not the old CRT. So I'm just wondering what I'd need to reset. Could be that I just need to reset something? Or alternatively get a new graphics card.
The graphics card I have was installed when I did still have a box like monitor, which I'd assume was CRT. So I'm just wondering if it is out of date or could be further adjusted.

Do you really need the programme that came with the camera? I had a similar thing and the programme just got in the way. I ended up just moving the picture files using My Computer

I'm not sure, I did just move a few photos that way but i would prefer to have the thing synching right if possible.

Just seen that my computer has monitor listed as default instead of having any reference to what the make is or anything. So I'm wondering if it's just not detecting what size the thing is. Would think it was pretty standard sized flatscreen so should be capable of getting higher resolution. Did buy it 2nd hand but wouldn't have thought that would directly lead to something like this.

I hate giant, soulless big box stores that have room to sell everything year 'round yet who still designate certain goods "seasonal" and don't stock them in the purported off-season. I went to a Menard's today looking for a large pot and some soil to transplant an indoor plant, and lo and behold, the selection was paltry and picked over. See also: stores like Old Navy that stop selling summer stuff mid-summer - or winter stuff mid-winter. As if no one ever has a reason to buy hats in the actual winter or flip-flops in the actual summer. Screw these places.

Yeah that really wound me up with old navy. I wanted to stock up on pj pants and they only sold the ones I wanted for two weeks a year.