Conservapedia - An encyclopedia you can trust

humans - the apes taht can do math

In the late 20th century conservatives found new ways to use language and the media to support their goals and to shape the vocabulary of political discourse.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Conservatism_in_the_United_States#Semantics.2C_language.2C_and_media

the KJV - a well known liberal plot to get Christians into appreciating lyrical and poetic turns of phrase.

The whole concept of the Conservabible makes me want to do my own translation that uses only crisp, technocratic babble whenever possible just to demonstrate how ridic translations put into "modern laguange" are in general. But I'm way too lazy for that kind of thing... I mean, the Bible is a big book!

See also:

http://truth-out.org/progressivepicks/item/12401-george-lakoff-progressives-need-to-use-language-that-reflects-moral-values

Jesus reciprocated: ”Have the greatest possible affection for the Lord your God with all your main circulatory-system organ and with all your incorporeal non-observable attributes and with all your psychological framework, worldview and cognitive processes.’ This is the primary and most pronounced commandment. And the penultimate is similar in a like-wise manner: ‘Love the cohabitants of your locality as your own individuality.’

- Matthew 22:37-39

The Banaka Bible

"Statistically impossible" obviously means improbable beyond reasonable doubt. That is a standard that people use every day, and is well-accepted. When the probability of something falls to a very low level, then it is impossible in a practical sense. It is not merely "highly improbable," which connotes some reasonable possibility.--Andy Schlafly

As is the case with Biblical scientific foreknowledge, the Bible shows a comprehension of knowledge of political events far ahead of its time. Examples include:

In Proverbs 29:9, the tenor of the 2012 vice presidential debate was clearly described: "When a wise man debates a fool, the fool rages and laughs, and there is no peace and quiet."

A word fitly spoken is like apples of gold in settings of silver.

Atheist and evolutionist women are like drippy faucets! Long haired, creationist, wife sweethearts are fruitful and multiply. The righteous shall inherit the earth!

According to the National Peanut Board, American women and children prefer creamy peanut butter, while most American men prefer chunky peanut butter. Unfortunately, for wimpy evolutionist men they can't even eat chunky peanut butter in their homes because their feminist women will not allow it!

In his book, "The Pink Swastika," Lively claims that although the Nazis did persecute homosexuals, the homosexuals the Nazis persecuted were almost exclusively the effeminate members of the gay community in Germany, and that much of the mistreatment was administered by masculine homosexuals who despised effeminacy in all its forms.[4]

http://www.conservapedia.com/Bob_Marley

The goofy atheist Stephen Hawking goes off the deep end with his "little green men" fantasies.[3]
Hawking's foolishness was a contributing factor to him losing his wonderful Christian wife and then marrying a woman who was accused of abusing him.[4][5]

holy shit

http://conservapedia.com/Essay:Best_New_Conservative_Words has been blowing my mind. Doubling every century! Of course!

yeah that one is probably the best evidence of Schlafly being mentally ill

"refudiate 2010 combination of refute and repudiate, as coined by Sarah Palin"

"boomerang 1825 originally coined to describe a throwing device that returns to the thrower, the term became increasingly useful to describe how wrongful conduct returns to bite the perpetrator "

.... I'm at a loss. How the fuck does he think a multithousand year old Australian aboroginal word was invented in 1825?

White people found it = it was invented.

monogamy 1612 this has the same date of origin as "productive", and that may not be a coincidence!

Being charitable, he could be dating the secondary meaning and stating that it was conservatives who created the metaphor?

He *is* completely batshit, though.

Also, lol biological clock 1955 - how each woman begins to lose her ability to have children at age 27, no matter how much feminists try to conceal this scientific fact from women

Tebowing 2011 bending on one knee in public to give glory to God (named after pro-life NFL QB Tim Tebow)

Hah no shit?

a morning work ethic is a conservative concept.

how he decides these words are strictly the domain of conservatives i just don't even

it's called tribalism. It has dick-all to do with politics or theology or anything but straight pathology and psychological issues. Dude was raised by Phyllis Schlafly to detest the modern world.

I mean this literally. He has as many issues with modernity as K-Lo from the National Review Online does.

ok it's definitely getting crazier since the election:

NFL owners need to do some soul-searching about their atheistic culture after today's tragic loss of life.
How about team prayers before and after games, for a change?

lololol we're being trolled, right?

The atheistic culture of the NFL continues to destroy lives, in contrast with college #1 Notre Dame.
The most the NFL mustered today was a politically correct "moment of silence" after Saturday's slaughter.

Musical examples
"Battle Hymn of the Republic," the only significant song by Julia Ward Howe, written in the dark during a pre-dawn inspiration
"I Can See Clearly Now," a massive one-hit wonder by Johnny Nash in 1972
"You Light Up My Life," the only hit by Debbie Boone, was a tribute to God that topped the charts for many weeks
"Sunshine" (1971), which was not only a one-hit wonder by Jonathan Edwards, but it was included in his album only because a preferred song had been accidentally erased.[8]
"Ice Ice Baby" was the "B-side" filler panned by "experts" which became a massive hit because a disc jockey played it by chance; allegedly written by Vanilla Ice when he was 16[9]
American Idol
"The Star-Spangled Banner," the national anthem of the United States
"96 Tears" by Question Mark and the Mysterians reached Number One on the charts, and overshadowed subsequent successes by the band.
a-ha produced the ground-breaking video and song "Take On Me", despite never charting again for singles, albums, or videos.
"In the Year 2525", by Zager and Evans, reached number one in both the United States and the United Kingdom. The group had no other Top 40 songs in either country, making them the only group to have this kind of "one-hit wonder" in both countries.
(add more one-hit wonders)

"B-side" filler panned by "experts"

a-ha produced the ground-breaking video and song "Take On Me", despite never charting again for singles, albums, or videos.

"The Sun Always Shines on TV" hit #20 on the US charts.

in the year 2525, if Conservapedia is still online...

Wait what is "96 Tears" an example of?

Liberal bias by the lamestream media.

http://www.conservapedia.com/Best_of_the_public

an amazing unifying theory

so basically the plot from Rudy

You got to give him credit for sheer, unadulterated chutzpah...

It is important to note the difference between "Best of the Public" and "mob rule." Simply allowing the loudest or most numerous voices to prevail is not the same thing as allowing the best of the public to drive achievement. Sites such as Wikipedia operate on the principle of mob rule, and as a result, are plagued with bias, inaccuracy, and an inability to differentiate between significant insights and trivia.

the Epistle to the Hebrews was possibly written by Jesus; its intellectual force is at the highest level

http://conservapedia.com/Mystery:Why_Are_Black_Americans_Still_Poor%3F

i don't know if i have the stomach for that

I definitely don't

Yeah, don't bother.

I was expecting alot more demented rambling--it's all just "why because conservative values." I guess the best takeaway is that only 3500 people have read that page in the last 4 years.

But all of them started a conservative think-tank.

Ha, there are 1,018 messages here. ILM is 1/3 of their audience.

No surprise here: the Oregon Young Mass Murderer spent lots of time playing video games. [1]
And nothing else explains his killing rampage.
We pray for the victims ... and that people realize the liberal media will never criticize video games.

Rampage in another school leaves 23 injured, but this time it involves a knife: [5] And why is the liberal media largely silent on this story? Is it because there's no guns involved?