Let's bitch about our stupid, annoying co-workers

1. "What does agriculture mean?"

2. "I was so annoyed. Someone threw themselves under my tube yesterday. People that do that must be mad."

3. Me: "Just tell them to put the web address in and it will take them straight into the site."

Her: "What address? Their address?"

Other things he did: worked at his cube standing up (making everyone around him very tense), unbuttoned his shirts halfway down his chest, commented on every phone conversation I had (work related or not), talked to himself, and played horrible CD-Rs of cabaret tunes he wrote and produced. I think the whole experience inoculated me against ever being annoyed by co-workers again.

Unfortunately something this stupid is uttered in my office at least once a day...

An old japanese woman wearing a baby dress and pigtails jumping and down in front of me at the desk. I just came in. Please, let me wake up a bit first. Or am I still dreaming?

i feel like i'm missing out

There's nothing like a five minute meeting with your boss in which he tells you that you've basically got like two months to turn things around with a mouth full of Mike n' Ikes.

big flat mole on the left side of his face with 9 really long and scraggly hairs growing out of it. He was always playing with them... twisting and pulling on them (but not pulling them out.) Very distracting....

"Please tell me if you understand what I am saying, at the moment in the exqualifier there are only a 4 digit code, you append another 3 in front of them I don't know where, but doesn't matter anyway to sort out the letter in the front for the new code."

I assure you it makes only 1% more sense to me than it does to you.

THis goes on at least ONCE A WEEK in my office.

Also, I don't think the owner's secretary knows how to use the phone properly, because she's always complaining that "the phones are down", but it's only her phone, apparently. And when someone comes in to test it, it works.

I think you just identified the perv dream of far too many people in the world. But you'd have to give them guns too.

The only really annoying thing my current co-workers do is send me ridiculous spam forwards about poisoned shampoo samples (normally originating from higher up in the Council!), then look sceptical when I explain that it's a dumb scaremongering thing to do. Also I have to tell them how to spell things all the live long day.

I have found that replying to annoying forwarders with a link to Urban Legends stops them dead in their tracks.

new GM of the region changed the summer shift schedules for all the gyms, so there’s an 8-2, a 1:30-7:30, and a 4-10. this would work well at our other gyms, which are either smaller or don’t have heavy foot traffic on weekdays. but our gym’s busiest hours are 6:30-8:30.

this means that i ended up leaving 25 minutes late from my 7:30 end time because there was too much shit going on that i couldn’t just leave, as my co-worker was running a training. i ended up having to pull a coach who once had my job to take over for a few minutes so i could leave.

deeply tired of being smarter than my bosses.

head of IT department here really bothers me, they should just rename it the gaslighting department

I would never have the patience to be in IT. As it is, because ours is outsourced to a 3rd party company who is terrible, I get lots of tech related questions from instructors that typically:

-Contain screenshots where the important part is cut off

-say something unhelpful like "isn't working

-Establish they did little to no troubleshooting before just immediately rushing to get help.

Then, when you ask a follow-up question, you get an "I don't know, I'll find out" followed by no answer for hours, followed by them asking you if you have any updates as if the answer to your question wasn't directly tied to resolving it

There’s someone in my plant who’s started taking up two disabled spots with a Ram 3500, the back glass of his camper has a giant version of this sticker - https://www.scrollfactory.com/products/urgent-fury-ranger-diplomacy-sticker

Bragging about invading Grenada has to get an eye roll even from people still riding high on their Panama action.

lol he was in danger of getting a mojito

oh yeah... liberating the sketchy medical school from marxist fiends, one of our finest moments

operation urgent fury sounds like a euphemism for a prescribed anger management program.

this sticker

Or masturbation.

And is that a totenkopf and half an SS lightning bolt?

This annoying creepy guy I work is convinced we all hate him and that the work environment is toxic. The truth is he’s just bad at his job and doesn’t listen. It’s not that deep. Anyway, he’s talking all this shit to HR about his colleagues (inc. me) and creating a bunch of extra auditing work for us as a result. Not only stupid and annoying but also vengeful! He’s hasn’t shown up at all this week, wonder if he knows we’re all mad at him now.

eugh i already feel bad posting about that. just blowing off steam, i guess.