What is considered a "fat girl" these days? I really want to know.

Chubby Chums Are Grateful Girls!
By George Pesante

The trouble with this country is not smog or juvenile delinquency or even TV commercials. The trouble with this country is, that it’s getting so hard to find a fat girl.

Oh, sure, they still exist, and a good thing too, because if they ever do disappear from view, we’re going to have to raise them in special herds like the vanishing buffalo.

But what with all this diet talk and reducing salons springing up to replace the corner pool room, and what with cars getting smaller, lower, the fat girl is being driven out of fashion.

This is too bad. Any man who has played parlor hockey with a fat girl knows that here is a wonderful fund of fun, frolic and felicity.

Unlike slim girls who are the darlings of modern fashion, fat girls get little attention. That means that when a man does bestow his favors upon them, they react like a St. Bernard in a sausage factory.

They laugh, they giggle, they respond to your attentions with happy shrieks. In short, they just lap it up. What’s more, they don’t need to be persuaded. Simply give them the nod and they’re off to the races. And once a fat girl gets herself in motion, she’s awfully hard to stop.

Incidentally, the old belief that fat girls are necessarily jolly girls is only sometimes true. There are plenty of fat girls who are so frustrated by their lack of male attention that they are foul-tempered, mean and sullen.

The majority of them are sunny though, and even the grumpy lumpies will respond much more quickly to a little warmth than the average slim-waisted woman.

Some girls are fat, of course, because they have glandular deficiencies and these are generally to be avoided. Frequently they have moustaches and evil tempers and are so fat as to cause topographical confusion.

On the other hand, a girl who is generously plump, simply because the good Lord made her that way, a girl who likes to eat and drink and have herself a good time — this girl is worth solid gold, all 180 pounds of her.

Another fallacy about fat girls is that they are light on their feet. This isn’t true, most of them are as heavy as all get-out. But it’s pretty easy to get them off their feet. And that’s what really counts.

A fat girl is used to the notiion that people can’t lift her up and toss her around as if she were a ballerina. Consequently, she won’t force you to go through those gymnastics. She’ll arrange herself in such a way as to spare you the grunt and groan preliminaries.

Generally speaking, fat girls have one trait in common which their slimmer sisters do not always enjoy. They tend to have skins as smooth as foam rubber and twice as bouncy.

They cost less to feed than slim girls because they go in heavy for bread and mashed potatoes and show a marked preference for beer.

Because fat girls do not get the rush that slim girls do, they don’t expect to be taken out to fancy places. They don’t expect filet mignon and champagne. The back seat of a car and a pile of sandwiches will do nicely, especially if both the sandwiches and the back seat are big.

Fat girls tend to live alone more often than slim girls. They need more room around them and also, they are embarrassed by their slimmer roommates. This makes it much easier to date a fat girl, and what’s more, to make the date pay off.

Needless to say, fat girls are a joy in the wintertime, because there’s nothing more comforting than to find yourself enfolded by great mounds of curvy girl. They are equally delightful in the summer time, however, because they like nothing on but the electric fan. And, after all, what could be more fun than that?

stop posting economist articles here

ethan, do you:

(A) Just surf the internet normally and C&P any fucked up thing you find, which, as a result of your normal surfing habits, end up being pretty screwy...

or

(B) Actively seek out the fucked up things, and C&P for us the cream of the crop?

Either way, my god, your poor brain.

Big bone-ded! ba-dum crash!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FzPP0wTj8Xs&feature=related

who's going to save the world from being saved by mark c?

-- RJG (RJG), Saturday, 17 July 2004 Bookmark Link

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ME!!!!!!!
-- RJG (RJG), Saturday, 17 July 2004

ZAFTIG, mentioned above, appears late in Jonathan Lethem's novel THE FORTRESS OF SOLITUDE. I understood the word so little I had to look it up. I'm still not sure I understand it, and perhaps I understand it even less after seeing its use on this thread.

George Pesante

Passantino's new pen name found!

Seriously, could any c-man or c-woman here really, honestly, be dating a person? An honest answer is required.
-- ken c (ken c), Friday, 16 July 2004

ha zaftig. margaret cho uses that word best.

to mean ... what?

chubster

gosh, I don't think that's what Lethem meant by it. Maybe I will report back on this. It's in the last quarter or so of TFoS, when Dylan Ebdus, invisible, sees a female prison guard and thinks admiringly that she's zaftig.

margaret had a great gig about how her producers were telling her she was zaftig. and then at a restaurant she heard the waitress say "zaftig, perhaps?" but really she was saying "a soft drink, perhaps?"

mwahaha

yeah, it means thick in the good way.

Curvy, soft. Pudgy maybe but in an erm extremely feminine way. Alternately it could just mean "busty".

Also I don't know if you'd call a petite girl with a big rack "zaftig", I feel like there are connotations of stature as well, like, y'know "a lot of woman".

sounds like my kind of tig, I mean, ting, I mean, thing.

so is like rose mcgowan a good example of zaftig or is she still too skinny?

Far too skinny surely!

She's not remotely chubby, is she?

A famously nearly nude Hollywood starlet like RMcG? Totally, totally way way too skinny unless you mean merely in comparison to a runway model.

no, especeially not these days, but she's always pulled off that beautiful voluptuous thing

right, right, i know you're right.

Jess needs to be here to properly define this

Charlotte Church?

RIP Jess's definitions

Re Charlotte Church, a quick GIS says "maybe, depending on which photo yer talking about" to me.

She is zaftig these days

The point is sort of that zaftig is a folk term, and was born from the Ashkenazic population of sort of famously peasant-y Eastern Europeans (I think, don't ask me to trace it back any farther). I would say that a) it's all relative, and b) there's an essential earthiness or hmm... suggestion of bounty, fertility.

sounds otm to me

zaf·tig Audio Help /ˈzɑftɪk, -tɪg/ Pronunciation Key - Show Spelled Pronunciation[zahf-tik, -tig] Pronunciation Key - Show IPA Pronunciation
–adjective Slang.
1. Gianna Michaels, fer real

http://bengals.hp.infoseek.co.jp/pict/past_player/ickey_shuffle03.jpg

180 lbs isn't fat! Not if you're tall, anyway. I mean it's not skinny, either...was that article written by an R. Crumb of 1918?

Funnily enough I was watching the new American Gladiators show last night and they give height and weight for the glads -- and none of the women was admitted to be over 155 lbs even though they ranged from 5'7" to 5'10" and clearly all had shoulders and thighs the size of quarterbacks'. I do respectfully suggest that that is extremely unlikely; 180 sounds far more probable (and healthful).

i would suggest that you are right about that

are fat girls really sluttier??

okay, SLUTTIER is not the word.
easier to get in the sack?

i guess as a ZAFTIG girl myself I should know the answer to that

Googled for the legernd that is George Pesante and found that the article is from a 1962 bongo mag:

http://www.erosblog.com/2008/07/17/chubby-girl-1962/

(nsfw pic, btw)