They're Remaking 'Alien' -- the 'Prometheus' thread

Feel like if I give it another six months people on this thread will start hating on this dog again. Will wait with baited breath.

think plenty of us haven't stopped hating on it but i'll admit it's a pretty and car-crashily entertaining pile of wank. it might play better with all the dialogue removed.

For sure, if every terrible movie were as well made as this one, the world would be a better place.

The right-before-credits reveal of the xenomorph-lookin' dude popping out of the engineer corpse has to be one of the most groanworthy moments of modern cinema

>do not compare this film to quatermass and the pit xpost.

Ha! Ok I will stop comparing this deeply flawed mess to one of the top 10 science fiction films of all time now. Duly chastened.

I'll just start comparing it to Lisztomania

milton yr music post are one of the only reasons i keep reading ilm, so yr rabid enthusiasm for this piece of shit is just baffling to me - i mean, you were already REALLY reaching when you started comparing it to zulawski, never mind nigel kneale, or ken russell. ridley scott has never been in their league even when operating at his creative peak... 30 years ago! prometheus is just SUCH a lumpen hodgepodge of v v old and tired generic material - like, i recently saw Forbidden World, which is this great early 80s roger corman-produced Alien knock-off, and it's 100 times more lively fun. i guess i'm trying to say - prometheus is very very commonplace.

BTW - I do think Pandorum was better than this, although I understand it was generally panned? That's one where I could accept the "yeah, kinda corny, twists are obvious, but it's a fun dumb space action movie with some creepy monsters and attempts to mess with your mind, man" argument.

I remain with Milton/Edward on this one. I'm planning on getting the freakin' 4 Blu-Ray set when I can, I care not what you think.

lmao cannot believe how many people have taken their helmets off itt

i will spend money and time on a bluray of this when it is confirmed that all dialogue will be replaces with an attenborough commentary

all dialogue replaced with Beavis and Butthead singing "Breaking the Law"

special non-director's cut with 25 percent more helmets

ginat white guy workout routine + diet book

special 'uncircumsized' bluray with non-cut helmets

Seinfeld slap-bass riff at the start of every scene

'behind the scenes' doc where it is revealed that guy pearce just looks like that

commentary by licensed psychologist explaining why a person would possibly behave the way any character did in any scene in the movie

good luck getting a licensed one

giant white dude supremacist propaganda movie

new ending where giant white dude walks out of a shower and the whole Alien franchise turns out to be a racist nightmare he had

nc-17 version w/giant white dude cock shots

franchise crossover where giant white dude fights giant blue dude from watchmen w/cocks

deleted scene where giant why guys boss tells him he has to kill himself on earth so that there can be humans and he mutters something under his breath and his boss says what and he says nothing

alternate ending where guy pearce dies before they get to the planet so they give up and go home

deleted scenes featuring future space richard dawkins who spends the whole trip arguing with noomi rapace and stealing her sodas out of the communal fridge

guy pearce's character outed halfway through mission as the '4th man' in the radio 4 groping scandal, venture cancelled

deleted scene where the crew think its p fucked up that wayland would hide the fact that he was on the ship the whole time so they have a crew only meeting abt it, cut to charlize being all dad you know you made my job so much harder for no real reason

director's commentary reveals Prometheus is the name of the delivery guy at Ridley's favourite kebab shop

guys why is this thread 3000+ posts

we took our helmets off

because this movie is 30+ mins

deleted scene where the giant white guy wakes up and the first thing he does is a funny rap

deleted scene where the giant white guy wakes up rubs his eyes stands up looks around sits down rubs his eyes again runs his hands over his head smacks his lips opens his eyes real wide then closes them a few times and asks wait so who are you guys

deleted scene where the giant white guy wakes up, claims he wasnt asleep

deleted scene where the giant white guy doesn't wake up

think about it

they keep poking him and hes all leave me alone tryina sleep and flails his arm at them

deleted scene where lab results come back and it turns out the facehugger was benign

michael moore documentary follows progress of patient through NHS, after six months on a trolley they finally devise a 16 hour procedure and manage to save the facehugger

deleted scene where the one guys dares the others to take off their helmets and theyre all no im not taking off my helmet on this alien planet you must be srsly mentally ill

deleted scene where they all talk abt what a fucked up guy the robot is

deleted scene where the robot sits in his room jacking off to Lawrence of Arabia for 3 hours

then goes and asks guy pearce why he gave him a robot cock but no robot ejaculation reflex

deleted scene where someone says is it racist to say i dont trust robots

did you guys ever see Pandorum, is this better or worse?

― ɥɯ ︵ (°□°) (mh), Friday, October 12, 2012 5:10 PM (2 days ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

that's a pretty fun SPACE MADNESS b-movie. not easily comparable.

I forgot about the "our DNA is identical," scene, seriously, it's like they just threw in every stupid wrong idea about science they could find. only thing this movie was missing was a geeky teenager to hack the alien ship

The right-before-credits reveal of the xenomorph-lookin' dude popping out of the engineer corpse has to be one of the most groanworthy moments of modern cinema

― ɥɯ ︵ (°□°) (mh), Saturday, October 13, 2012 1:23 PM (Yesterday) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

Also yeah this really should have been just replaced with the alien scene from spaceballs

dying at all these deleted scenes

delete scene where crew watches Alien and concludes that the takeaway is not to run after the ship's cat.