Innocuous things that make you irrationally angry (a list thread)

xxxp https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xfN1E5pSWwA

My former boss shared a first name with the famous film director Werner Herzog and I'm not going to give his last name here, but it was also not at all common and people calling our office would mangle is his name in the most hilarious ways. My favorite ever was the woman asking for "Weiner Bristle".

My first name (Josh) seems not to translate well to a lot of languages, so I find that a lot of immigrants get it wrong, which shouldn't make me angry but it does. I often get John, Jorg, Jorge, Joseph, etc.

It's that little tiny sliver of AMURICAN in me I guess that for a split second goes "Wait wtf I have a perfectly normal, common american name, why should I have to spell it slowly for you?"

Josh!

I've had Russian ladies call me Zoya, but I love that.

Just interesting to hear your name for the first time.

Zoya is nice.

I had a person call me for work once and he was one of those people who repeats your name a lot during a conversation and he kept calling me Ereeeka (rhymes with eureka). I thought for sure he was fucking with me because really????

I tell them my name is Xavier. Fuck you for asking, barista.

lool

But getting mail addressed to Aqua Backrat has to be the best messing up of my name I've never experienced.

Maybe I'll just start giving my name as Optimus Prime or something

I think I've already talked about how one-fifth of all monosyllabic words in the English language sound like my first name, so I tune out the noise as a reflex when I hear it belted out by strangers.

Add that I don't need a drink sitting on my desk all morning with my scrawled misspelled name on the side of it like a pre-kindergarten juice cup.

You can also add that I don't go to Starbucks very often, but what's the fun in mentioning that?

A British guy called Philip was introducing himself to an American guy and the guy asked 'do you pronounce it Philippe?'
No... because that's not his name?

IA today at the little half-socks meant to be worn under flats or something so you look barefoot but you're not. JUST GO BAREFOOT, jesus christ why do they have to be VISIBLE? I've been multiple fairly stylish young publicity things at the office wearing visible footies.

― purveyor of generations (in orbit), Wednesday, September 19, 2012 12:42 PM (14 minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

some of my flats hurt my feet if i don't wear socks, so i have to wear these footie thingies, though i make no claims to stylishness

Yeah, I do believe in making clothes and things work FOR you and not against you, in theory. But do they SHOW? They're not supposed to! The whole reason for them being tiny little footies that barely come up your toes is supposed to be to keep them under the shoes.

haha. you can see the edges of them. the footie things don't match the dimensions of my shoes! but i hate wearing flats, so this doesn't happen very often

JUST GO BAREFOOT, jesus christ

But if you do that in a my workplace you will make me the king of all IA. We had an intern at my old job that used to walk around barefoot in the office and it grossed me out something fierce.

Uh. Barefoot meaning without shoes or stockings. Not actual barefoot, what kind of savage do you take me for?

SORRY, without SOCKS or stockings.

Of course not you, but it made me immediately flash back to that particular savage I worked with and I had to put it out there.

I have high maintenance feet and I love those footies in theory bc they make shoes so much more comfortable and less disgusting* in the summer when my feet are sweaty but in practice nobody makes them big enough for my feet so I don't wear them bc they just slip off my heel into my shoes. But yeah, they are visible.

*also due to stupid feet and specific shoe needs, I tend to wear one pair of shoes until they fall apart then replace them so imagine wearing the same mary janes all summer w/ no socks (and the same orthotics for a year!). Gross.

Totally innocuous thing and my anger at it is definitely irrational, but the "Seen & Heard" thing on merriam-webster.com gives me the rage every time:

Seen & Heard

What made you want to look up infuriate? Please tell us where you read or heard it (including the quote, if possible).

and now assholes have started complying with the request which makes me madder, esp when in the comments for the "infuriate" page, a woman tagged a guy in her comment b/c he didn't believe her when she told him "infuriate" was a real word.

L*cy Moran
Totes a real word babez
Reply · 2 · Like · September 6, 2011 at 3:56am

J*nny B*rty
touché - infuriation didnt come up on my wakcberry
Reply · Like · September 6, 2011 at 6:49am

I don't remember hearing infuriation before, though it would be an expected participle from infuriate wouldn't it? Or is that just me not having woken up yet.

cold + not woken up. To infuriate is to raise to a state of fury. Which is what that participle would equate to.
Unless there was a term for anger one could fob off?

Seen & Heard

What made you want to look up "to fob off"? Please tell us where you read or heard it (including the quote, if possible).

I think you've misunderstood what the comment was. The reason I thought there wasn't a term infuriation was because the term in at leas the English language wasn't that. What was used in common parlance was fury/furious/anger and infuriate was only a verb describing the process by which somebody (probably accidentally) or something brought somebody to a state of fury/anger.
Subsequently if one said oneself to be in a state of infuriation one would be in a state where one had been brought to a state of anger by a person/object/event. & subsequently one would be able to fob it off on that person/object/event.
To fob off is to place the blame elsewhere.
capisce?

I don't understand ppl who ride those giant windshield motorbikes with the radio going. Can they even hear the radio over the noise of the bike? I mean, mabye idling but surely not zooming down the freeway.

And sub-section of that: ppl who choose motorcycles/cars that almost exactly resemble law enforcement vehicles. I don't know why it makes me ia but it does

They're cheap at police auctions.

see my true-crime-nerd brain tells me that these are the people that commit arson and go crazy and shoot people because of the whole 'disgraced armed forces/failed law enforcement/etc' thing who like want to enjoy the trappings of highway patrol and policedom

but I have a v overactive imagination and wish no ill will against these ppl who I'm sure are fine upstanding citizens

- my teacher retirement pension (with $136.00 in it bc I'm a v. v. part time adjunct) sends me a beneficiary designation form and invites me to complete the form online.
- I go make an account and designate the beneficiaries of my pension riches.
- right about where I should be able to e-sign the form, the site tells me it will print out a copy of the form I just completed and mail it to me so I can sign it and mail it back.
- had I known, I would have just filled out the blank form they sent me and saved them however the hell much a stamp cost these days!
- brb emailing the mayor with an idea to save our broken sad pension system some money.

lol facepalm

Jesus.

Sort of similar: Blue Cross/Blue Shield of Illinois wants me to get my prescriptions through a mail order pharmacy, probably b/c it saves them money. They say that one benefit of the mail order pharmacy is Convenient Online Ordering!

Convenient Online Ordering! = Go to pharmacy's website, complete annoying enrollment process, select your medicines, hit Submit..... then print 3 page PDF that you have to mail to Dallas along with your original hard copy prescriptions.

local government website has a page telling you how to arrange disposal of bulky items. it says you can phone or email. if you email you get an automated reply telling you to phone...

i love football so much, I love talking about it but FANTASY FOOTBALL CAN GO FUCK ITSELF SERIOUSLY SHUT THE FUCK UP I DON'T CARE ABOUT YOUR TRADES AND TRANSACTIONS AND KEEPERS AND WHO YOU BENCHED AND GOD DAMMIT GO AWAY AAAAAAGGGGGH

FANTASY FOOTBALL CAN GO FUCK ITSELF
FANTASY FOOTBALL CAN GO FUCK ITSELF
FANTASY FOOTBALL CAN GO FUCK ITSELF

for. real.

also when two people start a conversation and seriously spend half an hour talking about the same thing in 20 different ways. You've COVERED it already. Move on. Say goodbye. Let go.

I'm really in a shitty mood today, boy howdy

I got talked into playing fantasy football - and by "playing" I mean "letting the computer choose a team for me three weeks ago". I only spent time coming up with a team name and a photo and haven't done a thing to my team yet - meaning I apparently still have some people on my team who are out with injuries or whatever.

That said, I beat everyone in my league yesterday which means that my friend who spends a ton of time making trades and planning and such is probably on some other message board somewhere getting all IA about me.

mr veg and a ton of coworkers that I am friends with all play. they all know I love football and are always like why don't you play you should play and I'm like, because I hate your conversations. I literally tell them that. Everything you talk about when you talk about fantasy football and I'm in earshot makes me wish that I didn't even like football so I could hate your conversation more.

but I also can appreciate that it can make football more fun. so, despite my IA-ness about it, I do somewhat respect people's right to play it and have fun with it.

but can I just say that my coworkers league is run like the most nightmarish minutiae-arguing mothers club of persnicketty gentlemen, you couldn't pay me enough to join that league in particular

I honestly don't know why anyone would pay attention to sports without having some money or stake in it.

My IA - which usually works to my advantage anyway - are people so in love with professional teams, that they'll do stuff like draft Felix Jones in the second round because he's from Arkansas. "Gotta support the Hogs, amirite?" No, you don't.

hahaha, that's one reason I quit playing fantasy baseball -- I kept drafting Braves

I played fantasy football about four years ago and just wasn't into it at all, but every year I'm asked to join a couple different leagues and I have to explain how I hate it and nobody seems to understand, like for so many people it's just become part of the game to have a fantasy team. And then even though they know I hate it, every conversation throughout the season will, within minutes, end up like "Well I was pissed because I had Carson Palmer on my bench" and then I just have to tune out or try really hard to change the subject.

ugh yes, much IA for fantasy sports. totally surprised when they became popular, thought it'd remain a nerd thing.

don't care about yr gripes, ppl who sign up to play and literally don't participate at any point all year are the scum of the earth and the worst thing about non-$ leagues

thought it'd remain a nerd thing.

http://i.ytimg.com/vi/cBQ6IDM5Qzw/0.jpg
"Who you callin' 'nerd'?"

I will say that hearing two or more people talk about fantasy football is pretty horrible.

Same thing goes for other people talking about music, television, books, etc.

otm other people are the worst

"hell is other people talking about fantasy sports" john q. voltaire sartre rand