Just when you thought it was safe - OK CUPID PART 3: The Return of the WOO!

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PRESALE TICKETING HAS ENDED.
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i do want to meet helen, finally! and it would be nice to see you. i might wuss out though because it's supposed to be rainy and i kind of want to hang out with pen and cook dinner and read my book. but hopefully we can get together soon!

sure!

have you gone to that place in your neighborhood umi nom yet? i like it because it's delicious and byob.

B-g, your profile is not in the slightest bit severe. Not that anyone should write and hassle you even if it was.

some words when used to describe women just sound sexist to me. "severe" is one.

pale makeup is cool though

I am severe as fuck. I would be ~complimented~ if someone described me as severe. I would like to be thought of as severe as a Victorian schoolmarm.

After an initial lapse in communication and 2 aborted attempts, I am meeting this vampire woman who I am exactly 2 thirds the age of. I think the only reason I am doing this is (in addition to being able to say I went out with a 36 y/o woman) out of sheer curiosity about why she asked me out in the first place.

Ugh, see this is how low my self-confidence has got. I was going to reply to that with a joke post saying something like "if it's a competition, I could ask you out so you could say you'd been out with a 40-something woman! that's got to be double the kudos!" but then got so scared that it would not be read as a joke and just thought that even joking about taking someone on a date would be considered awful and crepey and horrible and gross.

So let's pretend I made that joke and everybody laughed light-heartedly and no one pointed at me and called me a crepe.

Hope you have fun on your date, ed.b, and even if you don't, you can come back here and spill the gossip on the vampire lady.

A woman messaged me today to tell me that she thinks I'm fun and interesting. She's now hidden.

I would be flattered to be called a crepe. yum.

May be meeting up soon with someone who has the same name as my last ex (of seven years). Not sure how I feel about this. I guess it's less weird than the girl I had a crush on who had the same name as me.

i'm setting a goal to message a bunch of ppl this weekend. i want to make out with someone's face!

I am feeling so down on humanity right now I just deactivated my profile.

A woman messaged me today to tell me that she thinks I'm fun and interesting. She's now hidden.

Full text of the last message I received:

"Hey, you seem like an alright guy. Message me back if you're interested."

...Interested in what? Your lack of effort? At least she's consistent with most other OKC users in that regard. I am interested, though, in the fact that we have thoroughly discrepant 'Looking for' sections and that she lives in another city...

I would've deactivated again by now except that I've been having a lovely exchange with someone (that's shockingly lasted longer than two messages without abruptly and unexplainedly dying on the vine). Although I think I'm going to ask her if she minds taking the conversation elsewhere so I can shut that OKC shit down and hopefully forestall a further deluge of fascinating and engaging messages from other users.

Some super ripped, buff personal trainer wrote me and said he wanted to cook me a Swanson's TV dinner.

What's that a euphemism for?

A Dutch oven, iirc.

I think he actually was being serious and it wasn't a euphemism. I SPOT A FEEDER.

would this be microwave or full on oven-style

More and more lately I've been feeling like I don't need to read men's profiles, I just need to know how they answered a few key questions. The ones about teaching creationism/intelligent design in schools, the one about women shaving their legs, whether or not flag-burning should be illegal. I don't think I've ever seen an answer to a queerness question that wasn't the most tolerant ans--I think people know better now than to be openly homophobic--but the dumb still finds a way.

ha when i was briefly on okcupid, the women shaving question was the first one i checked.

Not only are the questions often the best and most revealing part of people's profiles, they're also sometimes the only way to see how close of a match you are thanks to OKC's fantastically skewed metrics. I keep coming across people with whom I have relatively low match percentages but whose answers to many (and occasionally all) of their match questions are identical to mine. It kinda undermines the whole point of OKC's percentages.

Agreed--I just ask to see the questions with "explanations." A couple of users have had extremely enjoyable customized answers--f hazel is one, and another was named "chimeraminute," which, isn't that GOOD?! But we wrote each other once each and then he left the site.

I explain the eff out of a lot of my answers. If only because so many of the questions/answers are phrased in really dumb or misleading ways.

I answered all my qs long ago when you couldn't explain answers, and clearly now have to face up to going back and explaining some stuff. But I've answered such a stupidly large number of questions...

(just reactivated my profile out of interest in who's local, but went into anonymous browsing and took down pics so that no-one would bother with it; will probably deactivate in a week and not relaunch till I'm good and ready)

Full text of the last message I received:

"Hey, you seem like an alright guy. Message me back if you're interested."

...Interested in what? Your lack of effort? At least she's consistent with most other OKC users in that regard. I am interested, though, in the fact that we have thoroughly discrepant 'Looking for' sections and that she lives in another city...

Could it be an AI bot? I forget why they trawl dating sites, but they apparently do.

Been messaging back and forth w/ someone who just asked to meet IRL, seems quite promising, should I reply RIGHT NOW and risk showing that I how little I'm living it up on a Saturday night or play it cool?

Hey, thanks to smartphones you could theoretically be out doing something fun and you still took the time to msg this person back because they were more interesting than the fun, cool thing you were doing! I tried to "play it cool" a little at first but with so many people dropping in and out on this site, you really just risk them losing interest IMO. I try to meet up with people pretty quickly.

Lol, my last visitor was among the most interesting persons I've encountered, except it's a straight man. Nevertheless, I still sent him a message.*

*In all fairness it turns out he's the BF of this polyamourous woman who's been purposefully pursuing me to no avail.

well one of them, anyway...

How was date with vampire? This question is for edb

I'm waiting for the movie version to see how it ends.

xpost: extremely boring and anti-climactic. And not in any sort of interesting way.

Also, did I mention this guy that checked out my profile may be my doppelganger?

this is 2nd time in orbit's mentioned your hilarious answers f.hazel. can i see?

loool i'm pretty sure i just saw lag∞n (with a black bar across his eyes) in someone's pix

I will email you rayuela so you can see, although is in orbit the same person as laurel? I think of ILX as kind of a gestalt entity.

Yes, sorry about that, I decided to change it up after...however long it's been.

that is reasonable. also I am drunk right now.

I am not about to waste a Sunday night designated driver.

finally went on an okcupid date, it was pretty aight

good dogwalking partner if nothing else

thanks f.hazel!

so what's the etiquette when you look an okc date up on facebook and realize that they are fb friends with a recent-ish ex that you're not really speaking with?

I dunno, I think I mentioned somewhere upthread having been in pretty much that exact situation. Which sucked because I was really hitting it off with this lady on OKC and she got weirded out when she realized we both knew this same mindfuckery person (who she was semi-convinced had convinced me to mess with her on OKC...because that's the kind of thing you could imagine this person doing) and we wound up never meeting. So I guess it depends somewhat on the extent to which you and the date are okay with the coincidence. Which I guess you won't know unless/until you bring it up.

if I wanted to find out how they know each other, i personally would pretend i did not know that info and figure out a way to fish it out of them in conversation, and be like oh! i know that person. how do you know them?

I kinda wanna see f.hazel's answer explanations if they're so cute, apparently, but I don't really need an internet crush on an ILX0r who lives a billion miles in Texas I guess. :-/

Everybody needs a crush that lives in Texas!

Would it be better than having a crush that lives in Croydon, would be the question.