Innocuous things that make you irrationally angry (a list thread)

Someone just commented on a baby's picture (not mine and not an ilxor's) on facebook and I can see it and it's a newborn with HAIR ALL OVER HER FACE, like sideburns! LANUGO! She looks like an albino marmoset with a meth habit and like 4 people have already called her "perfect" and "beautiful."

hahahahahahahah

albino marmoset with a meth habit

dying

What else are they going to say? I guess congratulations would suffice because you can't really say "Well done! Don't worry, she'll likely get a lot cuter" if when it's true as is often the case with newborns.

"Holy shit your baby is HAIRY!"

"You must be so proud! (I mean, you must, for her sake, right?)"

"Congratulations! (She was born alive!)"

"What a little angel! (One of Lucifer's maybe.)"

"Yup! That's a newborn all right! (Gonna go look at your 2009 San Padre album now.)"

People who speak too quietly / don't know how to temper the volume of their voice in certain situations. Speaking too loud is another kettle of fish, of course, but every so often you come across someone who, no matter where they are or what the situation won't raise their voice above a murmur. So you're at a party or a gig or you're being given a training session in a busy office and you're craning to hear a word. To make things worse, by comparison your own voice ends up sounding like shouting.

There's a woman who works for an organization I'm involved with who is a murmurer. I went to a workshop she facilitated and she talked so fucking quietly that nobody could hear her (people were leaned forward with their heads cocked at her like dogs, occasionally whispering, "What did she say?" to their neighbors). At the same time, because the organization is made up of a bunch of gentle and supportive and non-confrontational hippies, nobody would ask her to speak louder, because I guess that would be trampling her natural inclination to speak like a tiny, chagrinned child. I couldn't stand it anymore and asked her to speak louder. She did for about 30 seconds, then back to her murmur. I ended up asking her to speak up three or four times and felt like a huge bully but damn, lady, don't lead a workshop if you can't bring yourself to speak above a hear whisper!

She does the same thing in meetings and it drives me nuts. I half suspect she just likes the feeling of people hanging on her every word. I resent that kind of blatant manipulation.

that sounds infuriating. i probably would have screamed SPEAK UP WOMAN at her.

I wanted to shake the shit out of her by the end of that workshop.

We have a friend whose girlfriend does this. So frustrating. We also feel it's a manipulative move; we know damn well she can speak louder because we've seen her be a jerk to our friend & raise her voice. >:|

my brother does it, with some added mumbling. He's almost impossible to talk to on the phone

I don't think I've heard a word my (wonderful) step-mother has said in 15 years.

Of course, it was no surprise when I met her older sister that she was BLAH BLAH BLAH.

One of my friends murmurs - and she's a really nice, intelligent, well spoken girl but honestly, if I'm craning my neck over the table trying to make out what you're saying, throw me a bone.

Apparently I have a really quiet voice but I just can't tell! It's plenty loud enough in my head!

what?

Similarly when you're saying "What?" or "Excuse me?" after every second exchange and they don't take that as the big fat clue it is. Really? You're satisfied to converse with a 50% comprehension rate??

Isn't low-talking classic passive-aggressive behavior?

Did I just imagine the fairly long series of posts in this thread about "nom nom nom"?? I distinctly recall people talking about other baby talk the hate, including "yummy" and "tummy.". What happened to those posts???

That was a diff thread

The Facebook status thread. Logically.

Low-talking just ends up with someone wearing a puffy shirt.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=On73aHpgdSQ

Facebook pictures of people's kids on the first day of school.

are the kids crying, at least?

my wife jokingly wanted to put a photo on facebook of me wearing my backpack as I left for grad school orientation this morning as a mockery of this

That's acceptable.

aw I kind of enjoy it. (sorry I am a cornball)

You're a clip show!

;_;

Also, shareware/freeware that wants to trick you into installing some C-grade search toolbar and make it your default when you try to download or install it

― computers are the new "cool tool" (James Morrison), Wednesday, August 15, 2012 7:37 PM (Yesterday) Bookmark

My laptop came with this kids' software, which I started out of curiosity and it was a bad experience. It filled me with a visceral loathing like an animal pack's instinctual repulsion at a sick member. It reminded me of when my other computer got a virus that made my desktop look very close to right, but not.

http://i.imgur.com/PS7rj.jpg

And I couldn't immediately figure out how to close it, which was upsetting.

I regularly have bad dreams where I'm a waiter and the touch screen computer goes weird in that just-off way and I'm in the weeds so I have to just keep trying to make it work. Ugh. Fucking awful.

when i see an apartment or office building or even a home with balconies outside, why do i never see someone chilling on the balcony. when i used to have a balcony i hung out there all the time. i wish to fuck i had one now. who are all these creeps with balconies who never seem to fucking enjoy them? fuck!

was drinking outside a bar last weekend that faced a load of apartments with kickass balconies and thought the same thing. There wasn't a single person out there and it was a beautiful day

Maybe they were all sitting outside at the bar.

yeah but they could have been drinking cheap beer on their balcony

I don't like sitting outside.

i like drinking outside

I do, too, if the conditions are right.

I get mad at non-balcony users and then I remember that I am a porch-haver who doesn't use my porch hardly ever. I am an asshole.

what, are you gonna pay all that money for a roof and walls and then sit out in the outside like a schmuck?

but my across the street neighbors are creepy and noisy and annoying and I know if I sat out there they'd just watch me the whole time

Ha, we have a back deck that I sit on for maybe a total of 1 hour every summer.

i think i would be a full blown alcoholic if i had a balcony/deck/porch

I am sitting outside right now, laptopping in backyard, drinking iced coffee.

that's some living

My next apartment will be a on as high a floor as possible, with a porch.

I used to have a porch (possibly-Chicago-style wood fire escape the size of a deck) and I sat there almost never, probably bc the view was of the alley. But I loved it as a place to use dust-making power tools and paint with nasty fumes.

I just looked out back at our deck and couldn't convince myself to sit there this evening. Wifi strength isn't good enough.

but wait, you can't have a porch above ground level surely

yeah a porch up high = balcony

Je55e, you remember our last place in gboro had that porch on the front. I seem to recall spending a lot of time on it. What changed????