slaves, tell me about 50 Shades of Grey

Zalman King just died, so ok.

Read quotes from the book off a goodreads page and imagined Dawn Davenport saying all the Anastasia Steele parts...

K-stew could do that lip-biting expression as he reveals the contents of the butt drawer

"as he reveals the contents of the butt drawer"

It's full of butts

My gosh!

i would totally go see a john waters 50 shades movie
starring jonah hill as the guy

http://chzparentingfails.files.wordpress.com/2012/07/crazy-parenting-fails-shades-of-fail.jpg

can't wait to see your family in 20 years on the internet

"Mommy, what's a butt drawer?"

Baby's First Butt Drawer

http://i.imgur.com/e54Vy.png

They should be D cells.

hitachimagi... oh forget it.

Members of the Nationals bullpen read passages from Fifty Shades of Grey

http://www.nybooks.com/blogs/nyrblog/2012/jul/27/seduction-and-betrayal-twilight-fifty-shades/

Penguin has apparently just picked up the international distribution rights to The University Of Edward Mason. Might just be connected to our CEO saying that the parent company's slump in profits (and subsequent slump in share price) was down in part to the success of Fifty Shades.

honestly, the first thought that came into my head: "what do the chocolate biscuits company want with the university of edward mason"?

Penguin has apparently just picked up the international distribution rights to The University Of Edward Mason.

This kind of news is equally funny & depressing to me.

Great screenplay idea, with Hugh Grant as the Penguin Editor and Reese Witherspoon as the fanfic author. Pygmalion, set to 400, 20 minutes, done.

dammit i can't love you you're tearing this company apart
BUT I DO

http://www.fiftyshadesgenerator.com/

http://m.gawker.com/5930787/penguin-imprint-picks-up-twilight-fanfic-for-substantial-seven-figures-orders-500k-copies

Dig this names:

Sylvain Reynard

Sebastien Robichaud

The number of people getting seven figures these days must be absolutely tiny.

I don't think the other Twilight-jacking multi-million selling things Penguin puts out (Vampire Academy and Angelology) went above six.

I hope Sebastien didn't remove the bit about the Edible Arrangements.

When is Stephenie Meyer going to get pissed off that these fanfic authors are making more money than she is?

the way they're sucking the lifeblood from her literary corpus, why it's almost vampiric

When is Stephenie Meyer going to get pissed off that these fanfic authors are making more money than she is?

I still think she's a lousy writer, but if I were her I would be extremely miffed. I don't think she has much recourse though.

I wonder whether she could sue them for infringing her intellectual property for the original books released via the_gazebo, if not the commercially available ones. Might not be worth the bother though.

She's probably more alarmed at the sexual content than the ripping off of characters, though.

I don't know what it says about me that I'm getting ads for these shirts in my facebook targeted ads:

http://shop.littlemstees.com/images/products/50s001.jpg

the_gazebo as in the LJ community? They put all of these in a Google doc if i recall, but prior to that they were completely public and viewable online for free at FanFiction.net.

Yes, the LJ community. I was under the impression that's where a lot of these things originally sprang up from but maybe it was just discussion and analysis of stuff that was hosted elsewhere. I think both authors were members, but i may be wrong.

No neither ever posted or participated. I used to read that community back in the day. A lot of FF authors hated it because most people were mercilessly critical of their stories.

EMI CLASSICS TO RELEASE
FIFTY SHADES OF GREY - THE CLASSICAL ALBUM

An Official Release Curated By Author E L James, Featuring The Fifteen Classical Music Pieces Found In The Fifty Shades Book Trilogy

New York - August 7, 2012 - EMI Classics will release Fifty Shades of Grey - The Classical Album, a 15-track album featuring classical music personally selected by author E L James herself and referenced in her bestselling Fifty Shades book trilogy. The album will be available in the U.S. and Canada digitally on August 21st and in CD format on September 18th. The album will be released internationally in both formats on September 17th.

Says James of the new album: "I am thrilled that the classical pieces that inspired me while I wrote the Fifty Shades Trilogy are being brought together in one collection for all lovers of the books to enjoy."

Fifty Shades of Grey - The Classical Album
The three novels in the Fifty Shades trilogy (Fifty Shades of Grey, Fifty Shades Darker and Fifty Shades Freed) are published by Vintage Books and have sold more than 20 million copies in the U.S. (the trilogy has sold 31 million copies worldwide). The books' various references to classical music have spurred sales of the pieces mentioned - even going so far as to cause 'Spem in Alium,' a 16th century motet for 40 voices by Thomas Tallis, to jump to the top of the classical charts in the UK.

Fifty Shades of Grey - The Classical Album aims to provide the perfect accompaniment to the Fifty Shades reading experience, setting a mysterious and alluring atmosphere with just the slightest hint of danger...the music on the album includes The Tallis Scholars' sweeping version of 'Spem in Alium' featured in the first novel, along with 14 other works from the books, such as the 'Flower Duet' from Lakmé, Pachelbel's 'Canon in D,' the 'aria' from Bach's Goldberg Variations and more. The recording artists include such world-class performers as Sir Simon Rattle, King's College Choir, Barbara Hendricks, and Alexandre Tharaud, and the album features cover art based on the novels.

"We are delighted to be partnering with E L James and Random House on this project," said Wendy Ong, VP of EMI Classics. "The Fifty Shades books are a bona fide cultural phenomenon, and they offer an exciting new way to present this timeless music to audiences who might not otherwise be exposed to it."

Oh Jeezu, Joy of Man's Desiring

I'm trying to see the bright side to this so I don't get too depressed -- hey, at least it will expose the fans of the book to some classical music they might not otherwise listen to?

dissuaded my mom from investigating this last weekend

altho tbf she's resisted literary fads before (she was a children's librarian and thought the Harry Potter books were stupid)

I'm trying to see the bright side to this so I don't get too depressed -- hey, at least it will expose the fans of the book to some classical music they might not otherwise listen to?

― LISTEN TO THIS BRAD (Nicole), Tuesday, August 7, 2012 1:38 PM Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

while dildoing themselves

this is why we can't have bright sides

Thank god people will finally get to hear Pachelbel's Canon in D, what a gift this book has brought us.

the album features cover art based on the novels

I supposed it's too much to hope that the cover art will just be the words KINKY FUCKERY in giant print

http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-5is96_ciseE/TbPBr18Fv3I/AAAAAAAAA6U/Cn1hn_vQkDA/s1600/Argh%2521_opt.jpeg

Oh man, Oneal is killing it here with his Newswire write-up:

Fifty Shades Of Grey now in classical music form, could soon be in "movie from The Killing's Veena Sud" form

The point is, Fifty Shades has sparked more than just increased sales of sex toys, "sugar daddy" website memberships, jizzed-on classic literature, and other works of Twilight-inspired fan fiction receiving their own seven-figure deals, thus making every other author wonder why they should even bother writing anything else, he sighed while unbuttoning his crisp, $500 dress shirt and then making powerful, long-lasting love to her quivering lady-flower, before going back to being a brooding rich asshole. 

I somehow missed this treat of a line:

"I feel the color in my cheeks rising again. I must be the color of the communist manifesto."

Dear god.

XD

Okay, that's not the best part. Dying here. The whole paragraph:

"Um." I feel the color in my cheeks rising again. I must be the color of The Communist Manifesto. Stop talking. Stop talking NOW.

Italics hers.

So much potential for the movie to be the Starship Troopers of romcoms. Though I'm not sure who's the romcom version of Paul Verhoeven.

Clearly that is Paul Verhoeven!

It reminds me a little of Penny Priddy from Buckaroo Bonzai:

"It's like a tiny big bang! It's like a baby bang! But I guess I'm just stating the obvious. Shut up, just shut up..."