there are subtle nuances in every single one of those EXCELSIORS, I'll have you LOL

If 19-year-old you had been asked by NPR to check out an a classic released 3 years before your birth...
a) what album would it be? Rumors
b) how would you have described your previous familiarity (or lack thereof) with the artist? Are they the same as John Denver?
c) what stupid nice thing would you have said about it? I bet my dad would like it.
d) what stupid mean thing would you have said about it? It sounds like old people music.
e) what contemporary artist (At the time you were 19) would you have claimed to prefer? FLESH OF MY FLESH BLOOD OF MY BLOOD

― uncondensed milky way (remy bean), Wednesday, July 18, 2012 7:55 PM (33 minutes ago) Bookmark

in settings, you can choose the person/thing you rescue. by default it's a lady, but you can also choose a man or a dog. you can also choose to rotate between the three. that's what i chose, so that every level i end up smoochin' a lady or a man or a dog. it's whatever, i'm just a spelunker lookin' for smooches wherever i can get 'em

― your friend, (Z S), Wednesday, July 18, 2012 9:03 PM (1 minute ago) Bookmark

Haha I love that game.

who's Klosterman btw or do i.. not want to know?

I'm sure someone else could describe him better than me but he's basically a long-time stoner journalist who writes half-baked theories at length before ultimately concluding that he thinks they're worthless or that he really doesn't have an opinion, priding himself on how underdeveloped his own thoughts are. Y'know, the guy who writes a five-page essay on a band he's never heard that ultimately turns into stories about listening to Van Halen records while hung over 25 years ago. He does occassionally write some brilliant stuff, but you really have to dig for it.

― frogbs, Thursday, July 19, 2012 9:58 AM Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

while...hung?

― Barack 2 Chainz Obama (some dude), Thursday, July 19, 2012 10:02 AM Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

I remember renting Basic and my friend was so incensed by the end I had to pull the DVD out of his hand and he wound up throwing a chair across the room instead.

― Legendary General Cypher Raige (Gukbe), Sunday, July 15, 2012 1:06 PM (4 days ago) Bookmark

Basic is excelsior-worthy start to finish imo.

it's kinda lol but mostly sad that someone who by all means should be enjoying a life of cultish adulation for something very silly that probably doesn't take much effort is clearly just a miserable, angry guy all the time

― Barack 2 Chainz Obama (some dude), Thursday, July 19, 2012 1:05 PM (32 minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

which chris are we talking about now?

― da croupier, Thursday, July 19, 2012 1:10 PM (28 minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

The followup:

--

?? idgi

― wack nerd zinging in the dead of night (upper mississippi sh@kedown), Thursday, July 19, 2012 11:49 AM (1 hour ago)

http://i.imgur.com/zi7hd.gif

― puff puff post (uh oh I'm having a fantasy), Thursday, July 19, 2012 11:50 AM (1 hour ago)

its a little ott but i get it

― heated debate over derpy hooves (jon /via/ chi 2.0), Thursday, July 19, 2012 11:55 AM (1 hour ago)

hey morbius, we can be a crimefighting team! with capes and everything!

― Vic Perry, Thursday, July 19, 2012 5:27 PM (38 seconds ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

lol dude u new here huh

― lag∞n, Thursday, July 19, 2012 4:29 PM (1 second ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

never heard of this dude before yesterday -- it is weirdly fascinating and lol-but-sad.

i guess this is 'the long tail'

― mookieproof, Thursday, July 19, 2012 6:45 PM (2 hours ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

you mean poop?

― wack nerd zinging in the dead of night (upper mississippi sh@kedown), Thursday, July 19, 2012 6:46 PM (2 hours ago) Bookmark

i watch food net on the gym machine (takes my mind off the pain) and yesterday giada made superbowl snacks for the hunky hub and his buds. adorable little hors d'oeuvres/finger food! yagottabekiddinme.com

― demolition with discretion (m coleman), Sunday, February 5, 2012 8:20 AM (5 months ago) Bookmark

i put this on my facebook a while back. kind of my favorite.

https://sphotos-a.xx.fbcdn.net/hphotos-ash3/545709_10150850060246163_205022721_n.jpg

― scott seward, Saturday, July 21, 2012 5:41 PM Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

also, is the guy next to jesus supposed to be a common everyday christian, or is he actually the antichrist/devil? the antichrist comes in a form that no one would expect, according to the award winning Left Behind series, and i could see him tempting jesus a la Last Temptation of Christ. "i could make all of these jeering communists go away right now, jesus. we could rule the world together, me as dictator for life, and you as my principal deputy."

― your friend, (Z S), Saturday, July 21, 2012 3:20 PM (9 minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

"you could be wearing a suit right now as well"

― your friend, (Z S), Saturday, July 21, 2012 3:21 PM (8 minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

"you could have the same haircut as me, jesus. it works well in any situation, offending no one"

― your friend, (Z S), Saturday, July 21, 2012 3:21 PM (8 minutes ago)

^<3

Theatre security has always seemed pretty lax to me--though I usually go to matinees.

I remember watching a movie in Memphis and a guy in the row in front of me kept lighting up cigarettes. People in the audience yelled at him, but no theatre employees did anything about it. After about a half hour of him smoking, two young guys came down and beat the shit out of him, picked him up and threw him into a row of seats. No security showed up. No cops.

― Listen to this, dad (President Keyes), Sunday, 22 July 2012 14:35 (2 hours ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

What movie?

― how's life, Sunday, 22 July 2012 14:38 (2 hours ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

Thank You For Not Smoking

― a regina spektor is haunting europe (Alfred, Lord Sotosyn), Sunday, 22 July 2012 14:39 (2 hours ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

Thank You for Smoking

― Ned Raggett, Sunday, 22 July 2012 14:39 (2 hours ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

DAMMIT Alfred.

― Ned Raggett, Sunday, 22 July 2012 14:39 (2 hours ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

I know. The penalty for people who eat all the raisins out of raisin bran, leaving only the bran....well it should be pretty bad is all I have to say.

― Vic Perry, Sunday, July 22, 2012 7:10 PM (24 minutes ago)

is it

― lag∞n, Sunday, July 22, 2012 7:29 PM (5 minutes ago)

It really is. All I have to say. On the subject.

It really is. All I have to say. On the subject.

― Vic Perry, July futzis 9:53 PM (1.2 seconds ago) Bookmark Fuck Flag Permafrost

You are new here, dumbfuck.

- Some other dumbfuck, July 22, 2012, 9:54 PM (.08 seconds ago) Bookburn Clog Punk Duplo

lol @ "Bookburn Clog Punk Duplo"

i wonder if my high school can retroactively remove Sandusky as our commencement speaker in 98

― da croupier, Monday, July 23, 2012 3:13 PM (22 minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

bobby bowden is now your high school's commencement speaker in 1998

― J0rdan S., Monday, July 23, 2012 3:14 PM (21 minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

ha

I make sure never to lie around unwary on the ground because you never know if the Rock is going to show up and drop the People's Elbow on you without warning

― dayo, Monday, July 23, 2012 1:53 PM (5 minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

Anybody who cries over the sanctions Penn State received should be charged with a crime as well.

― One Way Ticket on the 1277 Express (Bill Magill), Monday, July 23, 2012 4:34 PM (1 hour ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

the crime of feeling

― wack nerd zinging in the dead of night (upper mississippi sh@kedown), Monday, July 23, 2012 4:49 PM (47 minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

^^playing 2nd stage at warped tour this year

― wack nerd zinging in the dead of night (upper mississippi sh@kedown), Monday, July 23, 2012 4:49 PM (47 minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

re: 50 Shades

my wife was apparently the only person on earth who wasn't familiar with this novel, so I started describing it to her, making clear how bad it appeared to be and how ridiculous the phenomenon was. She was like "hmm, well, maybe I'll check it out." My internal monologue went like this: "NOOOOOOOOO...wait...uh...YEAH...wait...NOOOOOOOOO"

― Will Chave (Hurting 2), Monday, July 23, 2012 5:48 PM (40 minutes ago)

irl lols

Hearing that as a slow motion noooooooo

I like the "...wait..uh..YEAH...wait"

i found this kind of tame, although the presence of v-nasty kind of made it feel like anything could happen, which was sorely needed

― google deeznuts (D-40), Tuesday, July 24, 2012 3:00 PM Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

because she might say the n-word?

― nakhchi little van (some dude), Tuesday, July 24, 2012 3:36 PM Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

this wasn't a compliment

― google deeznuts (D-40), Tuesday, July 24, 2012 3:58 PM Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

the n-word rarely is

― nakhchi little van (some dude), Tuesday, July 24, 2012 4:00 PM Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

http://kkkorner.files.wordpress.com/2009/05/nbomb5.jpg?w=350&h=259

just checking.

Listening to some of Eddie's best stuff, I didn't hear anything at all new from where Hendrix left off. Eddie had his own guitar licks of course just like different guitarists have their own solos also, but Eddie certainly didn't take the guitar any further than Hendrix. Compared to wild, but smooth Jimi, Eddie looks like he was trying too hard.

― Alton Wong, Tuesday, July 24, 2012 6:18 PM (2 hours ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

WILD BUT SMOOTH ALTON WONG!

― contenderizer, Tuesday, July 24, 2012 6:23 PM (2 hours ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

it was backstage in dead or alive's dressing room that cloris leachman gave pete "third degree" burns his nickname.

― bajafreshnu orchestra (get bent), Tuesday, July 24, 2012 11:27 PM

:D

maybe rumours' song were deliberately in a jumbled order and 'go your own way' was actually a foretelling song of the times to be had with mp3s and cds where we could skip, burn and produce our own order of songs for albums.

― nathey, Wednesday, July 25, 2012 3:50 PM (1 minute ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

If I were Romney, I’d track down the first Republican rapper I could find (Eazy-E, where are you in our hour of need?)

Does . . . does he really not know?

― Marco YOLO (Phil D.), Wednesday, July 25, 2012 4:20 PM (1 hour ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

ok if this still doesnt give it away, no one else has seen this movie. also fyi name is in the url.

http://chud.com/articles/content_images/46/hollowheads.jpg

― O_o-O_O-o_O (jjjusten), Wednesday, July 25, 2012 6:52 PM (28 minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

obv from the classic art garfunkel gets high off mutant chicken trombone hookah

― vincent black shadow giallo (Edward III), Wednesday, July 25, 2012 6:55 PM (24 minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

http://i48.tinypic.com/r0sc5d.jpg

― you're all going to hello (Z S), Wednesday, July 25, 2012 5:04 PM Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

u know in the UK "chopper" is slang for cock

― Tartar Mouantcheoux (Noodle Vague), Wednesday, July 25, 2012 5:06 PM Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

http://i49.tinypic.com/302rnm0.jpg

Male

― PITILESS LIVE SHOW (DJP), Wednesday, July 25, 2012 5:22 PM (1 minute ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

aaaahahahahaha

Knowing my luck i would get shot down watching some embarrassing Rom-Com starring Kate Hudson, Matthew McConaughey and Jennifer Aniston. Then some fool will make a ribbon emblazoned with McConaughey's nipples which they'll place on my tombstone with the words 'Alright, alright, alright'

― Cussing like a bunch of Bukowskis (sunny successor), Wednesday, July 25, 2012 10:11 PM

one of my favorite things to do is to build a miniature apartment building out of $100 bills, then set it on fire, and then get in my firetruck which i made out of $100 bills and spray $100 bills at it until the fire is smothered out with my $100 bills

― you're all going to hello (Z S), Wednesday, July 25, 2012 4:30 PM (4 minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

that post has given me a mad gigglefit.

Once, after an IT guy’s rottweiler died, (Curt) Schilling presented him with a brand-new pup during an all-staff meeting. There was much applause.

― real men have been preparing manly dishes for centuries (elmo argonaut), Thursday, July 26, 2012 7:15 AM Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

i dont want a new dog! he yelled running in tears to his cubicle

― lag∞n, Thursday, July 26, 2012 8:48 AM Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

there is about one star born each year in our galaxy

the number of stars in the galaxy is approximately constant

so about one star dies each year in the milky way

there are about 10 billion stars in the galaxy

therefore a random star has a 1 in 10 billion chance of exploding each year.

we can't see individual stars outside or galaxy. the galaxy is about 100 000 light years across. so let's say the most distant star you can observe with the naked eye is 100 000 light years away.

then putting it all together the chance a random star has died since the light you are now observing left it is, at most, 1 in 100 000

― caek, Wednesday, July 25, 2012 7:05 PM (Yesterday) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

http://gifsoup.com/webroot/animatedgifs4/1324222_o.gif

― caek, Wednesday, July 25, 2012 7:06 PM (Yesterday) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

xD

awesome

"I don't need to smoke pot! I'm weird enough without drugs!"

*dons black fedora, krumps out of the room*

― ms. cookie (carl agatha), Thursday, July 26, 2012 9:56 AM (2 hours ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

one time my friends and i went to a best of the twin cities show at first avenue and one of the bands playing was this awful 12 person jam band fire-twirling and acrobatic nightmare named Wookiefoot and as they played a cover of "Scarlet Begonias" my friend mike started loudly and drunkenly bitching about the horror and a hippie near us retaliated by dumping an entire vial of patchouli on jeff and we all had to share a cab ride home in the winter with all the windows rolled up.

and thats what i think about the Greatful Dead.

― O_o-O_O-o_O (jjjusten), Thursday, July 26, 2012 3:04 PM Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

dying

every word of that post = perfect