Just when you thought it was safe - OK CUPID PART 3: The Return of the WOO!

http://slacktory.com/2012/05/20-guys-try-to-bang-psycho-on-okcupid

i would never answer that profile but i can see why some people would. marla basically sounds like a combination of early 20's immature slacker and smartass. a bit white trash, sure. what, white trash people aren't allowed to use okcupid? i mean, if i thought sushi was for pretentious blue state wussy rich people i'd probably be like, "she likes hot pockets too? cool! i'm hittin her up"

sure her answers were a little off, and their responses were all a bit, "that's interesting, can we have sex now?" but tbh that profile just radiates "booty call me, i'm down, but you'll have to deal with my fucking with you a bit first", so. basically the interchanges were mildly funny but tbh i'd probably prefer to hang with the fictional girl in the profile than the snooty full-of-herself girl who wrote that lame article.

now otoh *this* guy has *no* standards:

http://wrongnumbertexts.com/post/12206744739/long-wrong-number-text-with-an-idiot

i actually have a first date tomorrow that i am sort of excited about! thankfully that other weird dude has not contacted me again.

ky girl is actually asking me out now; this whole "hey your name might be referring to a lubricant" approach is working

my date last night was promising. second date already confirmed for daytime activities this weekend spanning several boroughs!

woohoo!

Go bell labs!

my ex asked out a friend of mine...awkward :( i don't really care (actually its kind of funny because i don't think he realized we were friends and i don't think she's interested in him) but i am having trouble thinking of anything to say to him.

but date tomorrow...i'm excited!

my last okc date fizzled into passive rejection. then i met someone else and was reintroduced to how easy things can be when you both like each other.

yeah!

yesterday was effortlessly awesome.

still living with my girlfriend although we moved a few weeks ago

my date yesterday included: an indonesian food fair, walking an arthritic pug, taking the east river ferry at sunset, and watching free music at the bang on a can festival.

saw bang on can allstars with my girlfriend some months ago :D

i can't believe how awesome that show was! we missed alvin lucier because we missed the first ferry but like, got to hang out on a ferry at sunset, nbd.

This rly good-looking redhead who appears to be a fellow weirdo hit me up; good conversation for a few days; wants to meet; I'm stoked, thinking we could get some drinks and see how things go, maybe hold hands. But then I realize he lives 2 hrs away and somehow the idea that he would travel to another town makes me feel really nervous and weird. And internetty. It doesn't make a lick of sense, I tell ya.

you could try my recent maneuver that somehow "worked". i declared the first meeting not a date and just two strangers meeting and seeing how they got along. somehow this made us want to be on a date more. we now refer to it as "date zero".

crafty

I guess it also makes me nervous that this is my first date in like eight years. *_*

assuming it happens

Warning: I married my first date in eight years.

is it rude to ask someone for their photo if they don't have a profile pic up? they're the one that messaged me...

No! Go ahead and ask.

i wouldn't even give someone without a picture the time of day.

i've been having an awesome time with someone...totally amazing chemistry and i'm crushing really hard.

I have come to the conclusion that most people on online dating sites are 'anti-seducers' (thats a term from Robert Greene's "The Art of Seduction"):

http://landofconfusion.tumblr.com/post/25792456084/anti-seducers-come-in-many-shapes-and-kinds-but

calloused and judgmental vs insecure and bitter. sounds hot.

Hahaha! How have I dated two of them in a row?

Urgh OKC sent me its latest batch of "hey, high matches for you!" ppl, and one of them is my friend A, who Ive dated briefly in the past but put aside cos Im not into his poly lifestyle. Now he appears to be compeltely single and has kinda been ridin' my back about hanging out a lot, with a view to rehooking up with me I suspect, and I Just Dont Want To.

if he wasn't poly, would you?

Nah, its not just that, tbh, I mean we're good friends but when we dated I found him a little overbearing and offputting, tbh.

Haha, the "antiseducer." Is that book worth reading? It's always in high demand at the library. By people who, sadly, seem to lack any sort of social mojo.

Good on you b_g!

Is this a dumb way of beginning yer profile, y/n:

I'm a militant agnost committed to revolutionary politics and Pixar movies looking for love (i.e. "Agnosticism and very serious about it").

it looks like you're committed to Pixar movies about looking for love which are also militantly agnostic
also I don't understand how someone can be militant about agnosticism

It's a cute formulation.

Pixar movies already get lots of love though?

How about:
I'm a militant agnost (i.e. "Agnosticism and very serious about it") looking for love
and
committed to revolutionary politics
and
<3 Pixar movies
as separate ideas/sentences

lol that messes up the punchline, but it sounds like it's already pretty well obscured that adding a few commas or subordinate clauses isn't going to fix.

so confused

Is it meant to be a gag? I'm sorry, i dont think I get it either :|

YOU KNOW WHAT EVERYONE PRETEND I WAS NEVER HERE. ::hides::

If OkCupid is going to regularly turn into this bullshit, I am flouncing.

(Back story, in the "most private thing I am willing to admit" this guy said: Not much, the things men have going through their mind would scare you)

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v209/Mandalion/Screenshot2012-06-25at93831PM.png

Like

a) is he addressing me in the 'you'?
b) is he addressing women as a whole in the 'you'

both are obnoxious
also clearly a misogynist
thinks if he wears glasses he might pass off as a sensitive guy

he lacks imagination

the tedium would shock you

oH MY GOD MAKING SENSE IS THE MOST IMPORTANT THING EVER I AM SO SLIGHTED

Oh wow what a cockface! I would not have been as polite as you were there, I think! Actually I would have prob not replied at all out of shock, haha.

OH MY GOD POOR HIM, HE HAS NEVER MET A GIRL HE LIKED BEFORE because you share some interests. Martyr complex off the scale (not that I have never...ahem).

Prior to this, a few weeks ago, a guy kept sending me messages that were like "How r u cutie?" and "What are you doing tonight?"

The ONLY question he answered on OKC was that he was on OKC specifically looking for sex.

When I wrote back and said, VERY NICELY, that I wasn't looking for casual sex partners, he said back to me:

"Hey, you know I can get sex partner in 100 bucks and my time is much more expensive than that.... I am here to make friends. Neways, Gals like you have problems in finding partner because of your suspicious nature. But Good luck anyhow :)"

A male friend of mine was complaining that every woman he meets on OkCupid wants a boyfriend. And that he just wants to hang out once in a while, and make out (i.e. fuck). I had to remind him that most women can get laid any ol' time. And that if we went to the trouble of making a dating site profile, it means we want a BOYFRIEND. DUH.

I just... I just... don't know anymore. I really think this system is extremely flawed. SPEED DATING MIGHT EVEN BE MORE EFFECTIVE.

Hey, you know I can get sex partner in 100 bucks and my time is much more expensive than that.

The fact that prostitution is his other option is supposed to be a...selling point? Tipping his hand imo.

cost of burger king and a movie followed by a couple 40s, imo

started a profile, can't think what to put in it yet, don't think i'd know what to message somebody either, :\

still in the hopeless case zone, obv

Its ok Ive had a profile for ages and I never end up messaging anyone because everything I start writing seems daft and I lose courage :|