slaves, tell me about 50 Shades of Grey

Is it possible to get this movie shot before nobody gices a fuck anymore?

I think I had a dream this morning where I was reading this book for some reason. Or the third book. I think the punch line was that Christian set Anastarghia free because she was now disinhibited enough to write a wonderful book about her experiences and his work on her behalf was done or something. I hope that's not what actually happens in the book.

Also I hate my dreams

i also had a dream about this last night! i was stridently insisting to a pizza hut cashier that 50 shades was better written than twilight and therefore supplanted the original in terms of canonical priority. "it's not edward and bella anymore, it's edward and ana," i told him. then i spilled a soda all over the floor and he refused to clean it up, which i can only conclude is symbolism.

argh, i cried, as my Pepsi trickled across the tiles

if you know what i mean

This book has been slowly gaining momentum around my workplace, so that there are now maybe six or seven women reading it and discussing it loudly throughout the day. Anyway, the other day the subject up for discussion was "Who are you imagining Christian to be?" and most of them had a famous actor or two that they suggested. This one 60-year-old woman takes out her copy of the book, removes a piece of paper from it and shows it around: "This is what I imagine he looks like! I found him in a Bon Ton ad and I said 'IT'S HIM! IT'S CHRISTIAN!' and I had to cut him out! Don't you see!? Isn't it him!?"

"I found him in a Bon Ton ad" is so poignant.

you know what, I'm over Donald Glover as Christian Grey

get Danny Pudi to do it

imo we need to figure out who is the most bland, nondescript actor we can think of

if he hadn't gotten all old, it would be kyle mclaughlin

someone working at that level though

a poorly anthropomorphized lizard. christian bale being another perfect candidate who's aged out.

Cory Monteith?

I groan, frustrated. Normally I’d be grinding my hips, responding to his touch with a rhythm of my own, but I cannot move. I moan, pulling on my restraints. The metal bites into my skin.

“Argh!” I cry. But I really don’t care.

Wow so the protagonist feels the same way we do. How meta.

i've been saying for days!

what about this guy

ha hahahahahahahahahahaha

I think we have a winner

lol

Ha

Well there you go. Via max:

http://www.freep.com/article/20120624/COL01/206240413/Mitch-Albom-My-Fifty-Shades-of-newfound-embarrassment

50 People You Spank In Heaven

Tuesdays with Bondage

call me contrarian but all that does is make me think I should try to get more on board with 50 Shades, since it upsets him so much lol

I know! I think his fear and hatred of it is the one thing that I see as a positive about the 50 shades books.

exactly

I think part of the fantasy appeal of this book is that the guy holds her to working out a set number of hours per week.

i live in the backend of nowhere, and suddenly in the last couple of weeks this book has gone crazy round these parts.
every woman in my facecrook list is currently reading/talking about them.
then today i am browsing the vinyl racks in local charity shop today and yup, it was the topic of discussion by the folks in the shop.

I made this comment before but all of these people would die of shock if they read Kushiel's Dart

oh man I remember seeing the Kushiel books in my science fiction book club catalogs when I was like 11 and wondering what the fuck they were

Oh my god, sex positivity! Noooo! We should be ashamed and prudish like we were in the 50's!

In related news, Lemony Snicket read what has been described by librarians as "hardcore erotica" at an ALA forum.

Tuesdays with...More, Please

The sales numbers of these are insane. Top three paperbacks according to the Guardian Review, the bottom of which sold around 110,000 copies. The next book in the list was somewhere around 22,000.

xposts: Yeah, this article is complete bullshit. However, I thought the main deal about 50 Shades was that it actually isn't very sex positive, seeing as she completely dissociates herself from her own sexuality, either by childish "hoo-ha" innuendo or projection of sex drive as a different character?

The 50 Shades You Meet in Heaven

oh, someone already made that joke, durr

The 50 Slaves You Beat in Heaven?

It's more sex-positive than Mitch Albom would like is the thing.

well yes, because there's sex in it

This might be unfair of me, but I got kind of a sad, low-self-esteem vibe from the author in the interview I saw with her. She didn't come off as a sex-positive feminist so much as a lonely former shut-in who had suddenly been thrust into the spotlight.

I guess her bio doesn't really back me up on that though. Hadn't read it before.

I think what women really love about this piece of garbage is the fantasy of a rich, handsome billionaire being a controlling d-bag. Do I think these chicks really like the idea of being caned and flogged? Probably not. But they love the fantasy of being "taken care of"

I mean most of this book isn't sexy. It's about a guy who writes a lot of stern e-mails and buys Audi's for his wittle kitten and asks her constantly if she's had a meal in the last 24 hours.

ooh, hawtt

and also tells her to quit biting her lip

Yeah I've also theorized that the main fantasy element in the book is probably the rich daddy aspect and not the bondage, which I think is more of a "how far will she go" thing. My impression is that if the guy were a plumber or pool cleaner or something instead of a billionaire, then he'd probably be the sexy, sensitive lover who gives her what her rich husband can't instead of a dominator.

erotic propaganda for a new patriarchy

that sounds like a Consolidated album title

maybe I'll write something about a spoiled pampered house wife who falls in love with her gardener

because HE IS SENSITIVE and LOVING and shit

I am sure it's been done many many times, though