yes
― EZ Snappin, Tuesday, 29 May 2012 00:11 (twelve years ago) link
the atoll one was good but I stand by my belief that puns do not win
― this guy's a gangsta? his real name's mittens. (Hurting 2), Tuesday, 29 May 2012 01:33 (twelve years ago) link
otm imo
― pet tommy & the barkhaters (darraghmac), Tuesday, 29 May 2012 01:43 (twelve years ago) link
There's something about this one. Runner-up = forks
― ljubljana, Tuesday, 29 May 2012 02:02 (twelve years ago) link
Needs more exclamation points imo
― TracerHandVEVO (Tracer Hand), Tuesday, 29 May 2012 10:53 (twelve years ago) link
everyone's a person who criticizes
― pet tommy & the barkhaters (darraghmac), Tuesday, 29 May 2012 11:05 (twelve years ago) link
Needs less 'know' imo.
― Mark G, Tuesday, 29 May 2012 11:07 (twelve years ago) link
one less k i'll grant you
― pet tommy & the barkhaters (darraghmac), Tuesday, 29 May 2012 11:07 (twelve years ago) link
"It's not huge, isle grant you that!!!!!
― TracerHandVEVO (Tracer Hand), Tuesday, 29 May 2012 11:11 (twelve years ago) link
"i'll never view a place at low tide again"
― pet tommy & the barkhaters (darraghmac), Tuesday, 29 May 2012 11:14 (twelve years ago) link
"We need a davenport."
― that is a weird thing to bring up over lean cuisine (DJP), Tuesday, 29 May 2012 11:42 (twelve years ago) link
"it is terribly ironic and not a little awkward that we have squandered our wealth on moving to a desert island with preposterously excessive immigration controls to isolate ourselves from the tyranny of sodomy and to escape the gay jihad on marriage only for me to now discover that i am in fact in love with you, and always have been"
― Roberto Spiralli, Tuesday, 29 May 2012 12:25 (twelve years ago) link
Please please submit that.
― emil.y, Tuesday, 29 May 2012 12:40 (twelve years ago) link
at the very least to colin firth's agent
― pet tommy & the barkhaters (darraghmac), Tuesday, 29 May 2012 12:41 (twelve years ago) link
short version:
"Why, do you fancy a shag?"
― Mark G, Tuesday, 29 May 2012 12:43 (twelve years ago) link
But that doesn't make any mention of the toll booth/barrier/fence deal. The implications are completely different.
― emil.y, Tuesday, 29 May 2012 12:46 (twelve years ago) link
it's irony/juxtaposition.
― Mark G, Tuesday, 29 May 2012 13:51 (twelve years ago) link
"I said from the start this congestion charge was a terrible mistake."
― s.clover, Tuesday, 29 May 2012 14:31 (twelve years ago) link
"this island satisfies me because i fucking hate mexicans"
― goole, Tuesday, 29 May 2012 14:49 (twelve years ago) link
"You smell."
― TracerHandVEVO (Tracer Hand), Tuesday, 29 May 2012 14:49 (twelve years ago) link
"I told you no one wants to live in a gated commune."
― EZ Snappin, Tuesday, 29 May 2012 14:51 (twelve years ago) link
"i knew nobody else would be here this early, didn't i say nobody else would be here this early? i just knew nobody else would be here this early"
― pet tommy & the barkhaters (darraghmac), Tuesday, 29 May 2012 14:53 (twelve years ago) link
"Yes, I know you like having him around, but to be perfectly frank I feel it's another unnecessary expenditure we just can't afford right now"
― pet tommy & the barkhaters (darraghmac), Tuesday, 29 May 2012 14:56 (twelve years ago) link
"Come to think of it, I actually do feel safer than I did four years ago."
― s.clover, Tuesday, 29 May 2012 18:07 (twelve years ago) link
^sounds like a winner
― jump them into a gang - into the absurd (forksclovetofu), Tuesday, 29 May 2012 18:21 (twelve years ago) link
"That sure was an unusual TED conference."
― oh jeez. I can feel myself quicken. (Austerity Ponies), Tuesday, 29 May 2012 18:25 (twelve years ago) link
^continuity
― oh jeez. I can feel myself quicken. (Austerity Ponies), Tuesday, 29 May 2012 18:26 (twelve years ago) link
"I thought YOU read the terms and conditions."
― TracerHandVEVO (Tracer Hand), Wednesday, 30 May 2012 10:23 (twelve years ago) link
Ryanair's tactic of flying into regional airports failed spectacularly in the Carribbean
― pet tommy & the barkhaters (darraghmac), Wednesday, 30 May 2012 10:39 (twelve years ago) link
"I do not know what I may appear to the world, but to myself I seem to have been only like a boy playing on the sea-shore, and diverting myself in now and then finding a smoother pebble or a prettier shell than ordinary, whilst the great ocean of truth lay all undiscovered before me."
― caek, Wednesday, 30 May 2012 11:19 (twelve years ago) link
*farts*
― oh jeez. I can feel myself quicken. (Austerity Ponies), Wednesday, 30 May 2012 14:22 (twelve years ago) link
"There are so many islands!As many islands as the stars at nightlike falling fruit around the schooner Flight.But things must fall, and so it always was,on one hand Venus, on the other Mars;fall, and are one, just as this earth is oneisland in archipelagoes of stars."
― s.clover, Wednesday, 30 May 2012 23:55 (twelve years ago) link
The "Ted" captions they chose are all rub.Anyways, moving on..
http://www.newyorker.com/images/2012/06/18/p465/120618_contest_p465.jpg
― Mark G, Monday, 11 June 2012 08:20 (eleven years ago) link
"The state arts board called and they revoked your grant."
― Convert simple JEEZ to BDSMcode (Austerity Ponies), Monday, 11 June 2012 13:27 (eleven years ago) link
"Every day I write the book."
― Julie Derpy (Phil D.), Monday, 11 June 2012 13:33 (eleven years ago) link
when you said great american novel etc etc
― Jesu swept (ledge), Monday, 11 June 2012 13:35 (eleven years ago) link
"All giant killing and no play makes Jack a dull boy?"
― Jesu swept (ledge), Monday, 11 June 2012 13:36 (eleven years ago) link
"Why won't you ever let me see what you're writing?"
― Convert simple JEEZ to BDSMcode (Austerity Ponies), Monday, 11 June 2012 13:37 (eleven years ago) link
"The size of your book makes this room essentially unlivable, why would you do this?"
― Julie Derpy (Phil D.), Monday, 11 June 2012 13:39 (eleven years ago) link
"your handwriting is really bad"
― goole, Monday, 11 June 2012 13:40 (eleven years ago) link
"You going to forge Jonathan Swift's signature as well?"
― Mark G, Monday, 11 June 2012 13:54 (eleven years ago) link
"Why did I marry a man whose ass is made out of blocks?"
― Convert simple JEEZ to BDSMcode (Austerity Ponies), Monday, 11 June 2012 13:58 (eleven years ago) link
"yes, they can send books directly to kindles, but they don't use wonkavision, dear"
― the acquisition and practice of music is unfavourable to the health of (abanana), Monday, 11 June 2012 15:45 (eleven years ago) link
"The phrase 'The Great American Novel' doesn't refer to great as in size!"
― this guy's a gangsta? his real name's mittens. (Hurting 2), Monday, 11 June 2012 15:47 (eleven years ago) link
"I'm pretty sure largehand isn't the opposite of shorthand."
― EZ Snappin, Monday, 11 June 2012 15:48 (eleven years ago) link
"This isn't going to work."
― TracerHandVEVO (Tracer Hand), Monday, 11 June 2012 15:49 (eleven years ago) link
"The "Ted" captions they chose are all rub."
― EZ Snappin, Monday, 11 June 2012 15:50 (eleven years ago) link
"What do you mean, 'What's wrong with this picture?' Who the hell uses the diaeresis anymore?"
― Convert simple JEEZ to BDSMcode (Austerity Ponies), Monday, 11 June 2012 15:55 (eleven years ago) link
http://www.newyorker.com/images/2012/06/25/p465/120625_contest_p465.jpg
95% of entries to use the caption "It's my day off"
― Mark G, Monday, 18 June 2012 11:10 (eleven years ago) link
"My arms are tired"
― Jesu swept (ledge), Monday, 18 June 2012 11:11 (eleven years ago) link