Twitter C/D

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heh


Dr. Jerry Beans ‏@dogboner
all my people that have mild depression or severe dont worry because theres someone that loves u and hes a rotating doghouse with gold teeth

tpp, Monday, 28 May 2012 20:04 (fourteen years ago)

Ste, I'm guessing they deleted the tweet?

The Reverend, Monday, 28 May 2012 20:46 (fourteen years ago)

new twitter is a completely over engineered mess

They're rebuilding it to take all that shit out now.

'bout time http://engineering.twitter.com/2012/05/improving-performance-on-twittercom.html

diamonddave85, Wednesday, 30 May 2012 02:11 (fourteen years ago)

hey thanks stet! I'll try that today.

wolf kabob (ENBB), Wednesday, 30 May 2012 11:49 (fourteen years ago)

Roffle

http://www.buzzfeed.com/provincialelitist/model-live-tweets-married-actor-trying-to-hook-up

Ned Raggett, Wednesday, 6 June 2012 20:21 (fourteen years ago)

The first thing that you might notice is that permalink URLs are now simpler: they no longer use the hashbang (#!).

#!
#!
#!

blossom smulch (schlump), Wednesday, 6 June 2012 20:34 (fourteen years ago)

rip hashbang

lag∞n, Wednesday, 6 June 2012 21:29 (fourteen years ago)

fuck give it back!

markers, Wednesday, 6 June 2012 21:30 (fourteen years ago)

totally not what i thought a hashbang was.

“Argh!” I cry. But I really don’t care. (forksclovetofu), Thursday, 7 June 2012 01:51 (fourteen years ago)

Roffle

http://www.buzzfeed.com/provincialelitist/model-live-tweets-married-actor-trying-to-hook-up

― Ned Raggett, Wednesday, June 6, 2012 4:21 PM (5 hours ago) Bookmark

yeah this cracked me up

shipl.de.al (some dude), Thursday, 7 June 2012 01:53 (fourteen years ago)

I loved the phrase "divine interception", ha

Ò (Ówen P.), Thursday, 7 June 2012 02:10 (fourteen years ago)

hahahaha amazing

kanye kardashian (lex pretend), Thursday, 7 June 2012 07:45 (fourteen years ago)

anyone looking for a reason why twitter exists

Convert simple JEEZ to BDSMcode (Austerity Ponies), Thursday, 7 June 2012 14:57 (fourteen years ago)

Each week, Sweden gives its official national twitter account to a different Swedish citizen... this week it is the rather entertaining Sonja... https://twitter.com/#!/sweden

only NWOFHM! is real (krakow), Wednesday, 13 June 2012 23:06 (fourteen years ago)

http://i.imgur.com/3LgCT.png

♆ (gr8080), Wednesday, 20 June 2012 02:25 (thirteen years ago)

social media

Authorities don't know who shot the 50 Cent the goose. (forksclovetofu), Wednesday, 20 June 2012 02:33 (thirteen years ago)

dying

decrepit but free (underrated aerosmith bootlegs I have owned), Wednesday, 20 June 2012 02:59 (thirteen years ago)

alton brown is posting cute drawings to twitter: squid, lobster godzilla, barney the dinosaur on a grill, the chairman.

thumbs.db (get bent), Wednesday, 20 June 2012 03:29 (thirteen years ago)

F5 F5 F5 F5

stet, Thursday, 21 June 2012 16:27 (thirteen years ago)

lol

deadcandace (diamonddave85), Thursday, 21 June 2012 16:39 (thirteen years ago)

sucks when a celeb makes the same joke you made in a previous tweet and you look at their RTs and favs and followers vs. your RTs and favs and followers and you feel a little sad about it

congratulations (n/a), Monday, 2 July 2012 19:59 (thirteen years ago)

eh if someone makes the same joke as you it's prob not a terribly original joke worth feeling any type of way about

abandon al ships (some dude), Monday, 2 July 2012 20:00 (thirteen years ago)

but i made it first. so they're the ones being unoriginal.

congratulations (n/a), Monday, 2 July 2012 20:05 (thirteen years ago)

starting a twitter feud is def the way to go in these situations

lag∞n, Monday, 2 July 2012 21:08 (thirteen years ago)

You gotta do the standup to get the followers.

Odd Spice (Eazy), Monday, 2 July 2012 21:09 (thirteen years ago)

my little brother has been laboring on this truly amazing twitter project far too long & hard to have only 18 followers-- please follow him

https://twitter.com/#!/eatingabagel

♆ (gr8080), Monday, 2 July 2012 23:48 (thirteen years ago)

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CNQpYz1ztx8

Authorities don't know who shot the 50 Cent the goose. (forksclovetofu), Monday, 2 July 2012 23:58 (thirteen years ago)

Why did your parents decide to have another child that is a bot. Xpost

Jeff, Monday, 2 July 2012 23:58 (thirteen years ago)

three weeks pass...

cool tip http://kottke.org/12/07/turn-your-twitter-stream-into-your-friends-linkblog

lag∞n, Monday, 23 July 2012 18:51 (thirteen years ago)

this is punishment for me mocking ppl annoyed that gchat is down

stet, Thursday, 26 July 2012 15:35 (thirteen years ago)

is twitter down too my lord

lag∞n, Thursday, 26 July 2012 16:35 (thirteen years ago)

Twitter is currently down for <%= reason %>.
We expect to be back in <%= deadline %>.

real men have been preparing manly dishes for centuries (elmo argonaut), Thursday, 26 July 2012 16:41 (thirteen years ago)

lmao cant even rouse the fail whale

lag∞n, Thursday, 26 July 2012 16:42 (thirteen years ago)

Thanks for your patience!

mod night at the oasis (NickB), Thursday, 26 July 2012 16:45 (thirteen years ago)

aaaaaand we're back

real men have been preparing manly dishes for centuries (elmo argonaut), Thursday, 26 July 2012 16:51 (thirteen years ago)

not me :(

lag∞n, Thursday, 26 July 2012 16:51 (thirteen years ago)

works for me now

congratulations (n/a), Thursday, 26 July 2012 17:53 (thirteen years ago)

oh god the olympics

lag∞n, Saturday, 28 July 2012 16:48 (thirteen years ago)

Tweetbot for iOS can mute hashtags and keywords. Quiets things down quite a bit.

Jeff, Saturday, 28 July 2012 16:53 (thirteen years ago)

Oh Jeff, you're brilliant. I didn't know there was a keyword/expression mute in Tweetbot until now.

In Australia we have a "sport" called "AFL" that's basically just a lower-class version of rugby. Every week the incredibly obnoxious AFL twitter account starts a load of brand new hashtags, one for EVERY SINGLE FUCKING GAME (#aflbluestigers #afleaglesbats etc etc fucking etc). I've just created a wildcard filter (#afl*) in Tweetbot that WORKS and suddenly love the shit out of you, Jeff.

undermikey: bidness (Autumn Almanac), Saturday, 28 July 2012 22:17 (thirteen years ago)

I'm very lovable.

Jeff, Sunday, 29 July 2012 00:47 (thirteen years ago)

In Australia we have a sport called footie that's basically just awesome

FIXED, CAARN THE PIES

steven fucking tyler (underrated aerosmith bootlegs I have owned), Sunday, 29 July 2012 02:03 (thirteen years ago)

They give you points for missing

undermikey: bidness (Autumn Almanac), Sunday, 29 July 2012 02:19 (thirteen years ago)

CAAAAARN THE BLUES wot did you say AA I can't hear you over the FOOTYMAYTE

set the controls for the heart of the sun (VegemiteGrrl), Tuesday, 31 July 2012 01:45 (thirteen years ago)

What was it this kid tweeted to Tom Daley that got him arrested, then? Did he threaten to blow him sky high? Either way, Graham Linehan's gleeful "get him banned" campaign is nagl

stet, Tuesday, 31 July 2012 08:15 (thirteen years ago)

It was something along the lines of "You've let your dead dad down".

Alba, Tuesday, 31 July 2012 08:17 (thirteen years ago)

Oh. I see. It then escalated into tweets like "I'll stick a knife down your throat" to people who attacked him

http://liberalconspiracy.org/2012/07/31/does-tom-daleys-twitter-troll-deserve-arrest/

Alba, Tuesday, 31 July 2012 08:22 (thirteen years ago)

jesus christ I fucking hate the way Twitter scapegoats individuals sometimes, and it's even less of a good look when those individuals are CHILDREN

the kid was being a cunt but singling him out as though the problem isn't endemic makes me really uncomfortable

lex pretend, Tuesday, 31 July 2012 08:25 (thirteen years ago)

it's even less of a good look when those individuals are CHILDREN

see also the hunger games racist tweets. yeah they were dubious but OMG WITCH-HUNTING 12-YEAR-OLDS IS EVEN WORSE

lex pretend, Tuesday, 31 July 2012 08:26 (thirteen years ago)

pour encourager les autres

ledge, Tuesday, 31 July 2012 08:28 (thirteen years ago)


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