Just when you thought it was safe - OK CUPID PART 3: The Return of the WOO!

grudging enthusiasm

You know me.

it's the way to go!

POLYAMOROUS PEOPLE OF OKCUPID - LEAVE ME ALONE!

I only discovered the poly scene on okc when I listed bisexual on my profile l o l

OMG

Hey!

I just got a message on Scruff from a super super cute guy who works at Trader Joe's. He recognized me. I've caught him looking at me every time I'm in there but I kind of thought he was straight and just being that Trader Joe's brand of preternaturally friendly!

Ugh why do so many guys got to name themselves lame things like "artyguy" and "quirkyguy" and similar vague "I'm cool, me!" words that are really offputting? Whats in a name, etc, but blergh.

creativelad18563

Ha yeah exactly ;_;

shit you figured out my name on okc

LAD

roffle

OK in the immediate list of matches and visitors on my page Ive got names such as "foodartguy", "artyguy435", "luv2plsrU" (ewwwww), and at least four guys with the word "geek" or "nerd" in their username. COME ON GUYS. TRY HARDER.

Je55e, what happened with the scruffy trader joe guy??

new dn

aaargh

lol

luv 2 plaster U

taintbaster1984

I kinda chose two random words without any real associations as my username so you have to actually read my profile to find me unappealing.

Lotta cut shirtless guys all up in my OKC today too, yuck.

gonna take off my shirt and send Trayce messages. I am "un"-cut lol lol

Hey, don't let me stop you!

User names are always so hard. I want them to mean something but sound good on their own.

Je55e, what happened with the scruffy trader joe guy??

idk. On Saturday we texted for a while then he went to work in the evening. I keep thinking I should text him but I'm not sure what to say!

I at least want to be able to shop at TJ without a pending text on my mind.

Plus he's going to be moving to my block on June 1!

I at least want to be able to shop at TJ without a pending text on my mind.

This is why dating people who work at places you frequent is...well, tricky, at least. I wound up avoiding two food/bevvy places near my old job because of this (just, y'know, awkward endings to brief dating stretches), and I had to hardcore rebuff the advances of the barista downstairs so I didn't wind up losing my coffee, too.

Still waitin for shirtless msgs btw, times a wastin! :P

When I was younger and a waiter in a small city, I really fucked myself by not returning calls and then seeing the guys at my bar or restaurant. So painful. I corrected my ways since then.

Trayce, visit the summer gay threads for some shirtless male pics of ILXors!

Oh god, I just saw a PEENER as someones profile pic.

*scrubs brain*

Was it hanging out on a beach or posing in front of something, or just kind of doing the casual hanging out thing?

I wish I could find this profile someone showed me forever ago. It was a 60s-ish-year-old dude, and his profile pic was completely in the nude except for the mesh cap hanging from his (presumably tumescent) peener.

ugh back to the drawing board...the thought of reactivating my profile is making my stomach drop :(

Darn it, I was finding your success inspiring. Sorry to hear this.

Mine's deactivated until I get to my new city in September.

yeah i don't know...it wasn't making me happy anyways and it just never turned into the relationship i thought it was going to tun into. he just didn't seem excited about me ... and it is like an endless mind fuck for me to be with someone that doesn't even act like they are into me. i was trying to make it work just because i hadn't been in a relationship for awhile and felt like it was important do or something, i don't know, i was happier when i was single and self-sufficient and hope i can get back to that point quickly.

going for a run now .... day 1 of new single better life

Oh God yes, there is nothing worse than being in a relationship and yet somehow still alone. I'd take being single any day over that. At the same time, nothing wrong with wanting to be with someone and be happy, either. Wanting and hoping for that is not the same thing as pining for it.

i am just used to being with people who are excited about me...i realized last night when he was totally ignoring to talk to this other woman and he seemed so excited and interested in her and i was just like....oh, so it is just me that you are totally indifferent to.

and then there was this awkward point when i tried to join the conversation and he like, didn't even turn to look at me

also, she was a model or something :/
i've learned about myself that i only get jealous when someone is making me feel diminished or insecure. i've even been in non-monog relationships where i knew the person was sleeping with other people and i didn't experience jealousy because my needs were being met. so when i have that reaction it tells me that there is something really wrong.

and then there was this awkward point when i tried to join the conversation and he like, didn't even turn to look at me

Ugh.

double ugh
i would much rather be told straight to my face by the guy that's he's not so into me rather than him going this (what i consider) cowardly route

you will go out with someone right for you soon, b_g!! <3

i am still friends-with-fun with guy i met on okc last fall, and that is nice, but i haven't really turned to okc for any other dating, sort of thinking real life situations will supply. i don't know, it's spring and i have come out of hibernation, as have most other people :)

I decided I'd look around for a minute since it's been a few months since the breakup.

The 99% match that it threw at me is an atheist academic who had a link to a whole separate intelligence test questionnaire.

Which, I mean, yes, okcupid, that is kind of my type, but still, jesus christ, is dating really that horrifying now?

we are trying to arrange a time to have an in person conversation and i'm feeling pretty gutted by the torturous email correspondence we are having. i said
"i know that i can't make you be excited about me in the way you seemed excited about that other woman, and there is nothing i can do about that, but that is really all i want out of a relationship - to be with someone who is enthusiastic and excited about being with me and about ME as a person and thinks i'm smart/pretty/interesting/special and makes me feel loved and appreciated. i mean that's really the only thing i care about, but it is definitely a deal breaker not to have. it was so hurtful because i saw that you actually ARE capable of being excited about someone, and it was just me that you were not excited about. does that make sense?"

and he said that that makes sense...but didn't contradict anything, which i guess means he doesn't really think i am those things or worth his time. i feel like shitttttt.

Yeah I've dragged myself over those coals before :( It sucks.

In other odd news, a rather adorable guy who looks like a south american Wayne Coyne and who I'd peeked at recently and thought cute (but alas, it appears he lives in Sydney) has just messaged me to ask me "whats wrong with the Beatles tshirt?"

...he's referring to the image of me in my BATTLES tshirt, under which I have captioned "you'd be amazed how many people comment on my "beatles" tshirt, sigh". So, this guy has just done the very thing I was rueing. And not ironically as far as I can tell.

Do I correct him playfully? I feel like it'd be mean.

Tell him it actually says BRITTLES and offer him peanut brittle

If you can figure out a way to say Buttles...i don't know, but it could be funny