Innocuous things that make you irrationally angry (a list thread)

Y'all should live in a town with a presidential library. Oh, how hilarious hearing about the CLINTON LIE-BERRY gets the 100th or2000th time.

Because, you see, CLINTON LIED.

Now, this is how dumb I am: I still don't understand what counting the change back up to the original bill given is supposed to prove.

I buy something for $5.76. I give the cashier a ten. She gives me 24¢ and says "six" then counts out four bills, going seven, eight, nine, ten.

I know there is a rhyme and reason to it. I'm not saying there's anything wrong with it or that it doesn't serve a purpose. But I already know I gave her a ten. That's in the past now. I'd feel better about her counting out the correct amount of change rather than counting to what I gave her in the first place.

Again, she's doing her job and I'm an idiot for not being able to count forwards and backwards at the same time. But there comes times like this weekend where I broke a hundred at Walgreens and the cashier counted out $94 to me and ended by saying "one-hundred", and I just stood there, possibly drooling, nodding my head and saying "if you say so" and "thank you."

lol I hope you were drooling.

Have you noticed that Walgreens cashiers say "Be well"? I thought it was just at the one by my house, but it's happening all over the city, so it's clearly a corporate thing.

They haven't said that to me, but they do apologize profusely when they have to run my driver's license through the CIA so I can buy Alavert.

Oh yeah, ppl breaking hundreds by buying 6 dollars worth of stuff. I remember really loving that when I worked retail...

I always apologize or ask if I can break a hundred usually! I feel like that's a burden a lot of places. No problem using my debit card.

I did ask first, fwiw.

Damn Walmart didn't ask me when I got the cash back. I didn't even know Walmart had $100 bills.

These two college aged girls in the line in front of my at the coffee shop this morning who were using "having a crush on" to describe anything they like. Just in the few minutes I was within earshot, one said "have you tried the mocha here? i have such a crush on it" and the other, "do you watch Glee? I feel gross but I have a mini-crush on that show". Can't you just say you like something?

that sounds like the kind of catchphrase crap I hear on a tv show, assume is made up, and then hear actual kids use later to my dismay and advanced age

Well, but they just like it, they don't like-like it.

Argh. That's almost OK w/ me. Like, if I had thought it up, I'd think it was OK to say in instances of *EXTREME* love of something or when trying to be funny, but not as an everyday way of saying you love something.

(Any subject) + porn.

Instagram full of classic guitars? GUITAR PORN.

Also see FOOD PORN, GUN PORN, CAR PORN and SHOE PORN.

The woman behind the counter at Starbucks the other day told me to "have a blessed day" and it made me i.a. Keep it in church.

Damn, Phil. You must really get i.a. when you sneeze.

That I tend to ignore, because it's like a reflex thing for most people.

But yes, I'm the asshole who gets angry at *being blessed.* Haha I really am a terrible human being.

(shoots self)

I don't want to be told to have a fucking blessed day!

hah bless all you grouches

I try to avoid "bless you" in favor of "gesundheit" (no way! spelled it right first try!!) or "salud." Though sometimes I do say "May Christ bless you and hold you in His tender mercies, now and forevermore, amen," or something similar.

A bus driver on one of my regular routes is really big on blessing everybody and wishing is all a blessed day. Normally I'm just low- to medium-angry at blessed day people but he is a little more forceful about it and it bugs me. Also something about being a captive audience. What does make me IA is that I feel guilty for not saying "You, too!" Don't feel guilty!

Oh man this is like PORN PORN

Dick porn.

There is the train operator who says "This is the blessed train. The blessed train is the best train." and for some reason I'm not upset w/ him.

Gotta say that "bless you" rolls off the tongue a lot easier than Geshundeit (No Guess Found).

My wife is a bit more ambivalent about religion than I am, so forever when she sneezed, I just continued to read my book or whatever. That is, until she complained that I never said "bless you." I asked, what do you care what "a man in the sky" thinks about your sneeze, and her response was still, it was polite to say it.

So now I try to say it after she sneezes. Makes me look bad when I bless the cat's sneeze and not hers.

xp Me, neither! I actually kind of like riding the Blessed Train. I think it's because he rhymes his announcements.

Jeff does not bless sneezers. I do, out of habit and because I fear looking like a jerk. There was a long adjustment period where he would get irked if I blessed him. I still reflexively bless about 5% of his sneezes.

I am one of those Event Sneezers (at least three, often five to seven) so sometimes I feel like Jeff should say something when I'm done, like maybe just ask if I'm okay or if I need anything.

LOL

xp to PP blessing the cat and not the wife

Once or twice I've tried quoting The Exorcist* in response to a sneeze. Results were decent.

*"Let Jesus fuck you!"

I will never say anything in response to a sneeze.

I just want some kind of acknowledgement that I just endured a minor physical trial. Maybe just a "Damn, girl!" Would also accept "Let Jesus fuck you."

Every single time my boss sneezes, she gets pissed off and says "ARGH! I hate sneezing!" and usually apologizes fairly profusely. It's weird!

And then I tell her, "Damn girl, it's OK, let Jesus fuck you!"

How about I say Qapla'

I would much prefer it if when I sneezed people said "The power of Christ compels you!" but no dice.

No lie, I've said to Beeps before while she was pooping.

How about I say Qapla'

I approve.

ARGH. You made me look up a Klingon word.

Don't be such a petaQ.

Go the Seinfeld route and say "You are so good looking"

I've started sometimes saying "Bless You" to my girlfriend when she coughs, blows her nose or yawns. I mostly do it to make her irrationally angry.

Works well for belching, too.

Have a Brian Blessed day!

* farts *

FIVE MINUTES. CAN YOU NOT GO FIVE MINUTES WITHOUT EATING WHATEVER THAT FUCKING CRUNCHY SHIT IS YOU CONSTANTLY OPEN-MOUTHEDLY CRUNCH CRUNCH CRUNCH ON ALL THE LIVE FUCKING LONG DAY IT IS DRIVING ME INSANE.

srsly my boss just chain-chews on like, rice crackers or some shit and the little, sharp, constant *scrrrrrchhh ch chhh chh* behind me is JUST loud and annoying enough to set my jaw aflame with tension.

Have you noticed that Walgreens cashiers say "Be well"? I thought it was just at the one by my house, but it's happening all over the city, so it's clearly a corporate thing.

― People aren't for comparing, they are for loving. (Je55e), Monday, April 23, 2012 8:00 AM

lol yes, I thought it was a commentary on my purchase of cheap wine and a candy.

Still spun out by concept of pharmacy selling booze btw

MORE LIKE HARMACY AMIRITE

My first time to Australia, I heard "no worries" in response to everything. Thank you for the delicious espresso-based drink? "No worries." Hold the door for you? "No worries." I'm sorry I destroyed your toaster? "No worries." Certain accents would abbreviate it to a charming "n'arries". Not so bad.

I suppose I do associate Australia with a stress-free lifestyle, and when you hear "no worries" you think, "that's right, I am not at all worried and neither should you be and isn't it a gorgeous day."

Hearing it back in North America, though? Irrational anger. Or at the very least, worries. Are you being sarcastic? There are so many things to worry about.

Heh Ive heard a few people say that. I dont think ive ever heard an american SAY "no worries", it would sound a bit odd.

Walgreen's is more like an expensive, brightly lit convenience store w/a pharmacy in the back.

Several times when I've said "no worries" to people they have asked if I was Australian.

apparently we also get clowned for saying "not too bad" when asked how we are

heh, we say no worries a lot up in Canada.. as well as not too bad(ly)