Why I hate the Daily Mail, as distilled into one edition

I lol'd

http://i.dailymail.co.uk/i/pix/2012/04/20/article-2132578-12AF39C4000005DC-145_964x390.jpg

Amy Winehouse's boyfriend devastated after being arrested on suspicion of rape

Reg Traviss 'knows woman who made report to police'
Will do 'everything in his power' to fight accusation

Will get friends at the tabs to vaguely disparage plaintiff's credibility

i'm a pretty broad-minded guy but going out with somebody who's been dead for months seems a bit off

how abt someone w/ carcinoma?

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/tvshowbiz/article-2136044/Imogen-Thomas-gets-hands-Simon-Cowell-book-holiday.html

Hmmm...

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/debate/article-2137789/Giving-Theresa-May-taste-medicine.html

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2137652/Patrick-Moore-says-hates-Germans-70-years-Nazi-bomb-killed-fianc-e.html

0_0

or should i say o_0

http://new.assets.thequietus.com/images/articles/1994/sir_patrick_moore_1246283574_crop_550x367.jpg

How high does this man wear his trousers?

alien anal probes do a lot to a man

oh booooo stevie

what on earth is your boo for mr d? xx

o_O

cant believe an 89 yr old whose fiancée was killed by the luftwaffe would be cranky abt germans

can't believe a cranky bigoted old guy would be a cranky bigot.

like why is this crap even reported?

Where the hell does someone even buy trousers like that?

round the back.

"Satan's Trousery - find us just round the back of Purgatory. Our prices are wicked."

If he pulled them up any higher, he'd have to cut armholes in the sides.

Just remove the lining from the pockets and put his arms through the holes.

Yeah, that would also have the secondary benefit of stopping his car keys from chaffing his nipples.

surprised to find out that the same Patrick Moore who had his own reactionary nutjob political party in the 1970s is still a bit of a reactionary nutjob. good to see the Mail keeping on top of things.

Vanessa Hudgens keeps cool at the gym with a gaping vest which exposes her bra

By Aislin Taylor

PUBLISHED: 23:47, 3 May 2012 | UPDATED: 00:12, 4 May 2012

the daily mail are obviously going for the blithely literal prose style of

Soft-Looking Monkey With Big Eyes, Small Hands

the writing is so so bad at the daily mail. like, it shouldn't have to be that bad, that inept, that clumsy.

http://journalisted.com/aislin-taylor?allarticles=yes

Definitely a theme emerging.

The writing isn't great at the Mail but it's pretty clear that the journalists are being told to throw things together in ten minutes.

The only good thing you can say about the paper is that it does give a start to a lot of young, inexperienced trainee writers who might struggle to get a foot in the door anywhere else. There's going to be a lack of professionalism.

the writing is so so bad at the daily mail. like, it shouldn't have to be that bad, that inept, that clumsy.

the copy for the sleb articles is just whatever stuff you can type in as little time as possible to fit the spaces between photos

it's basically vice magazine now and has been for a while

There's always going to be people who haven't seen something, so twenty year old pictures are News: http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2139914/A-rare-insight-Kowloon-Walled-City.html

The Mail isn't alone in this though: http://www.mirror.co.uk/news/uk-news/pencil-vs-camera-incredible-images-814135 - these are six years old, if not older. (http://www.benheine.com/projects.php?dossier=72157623723956821 )

(ok ok, that Mirror one is because he's having an exhibition in London, but still)

Yeah how is Kowloon walled city news now?

That said some of the night photos I hadn't seen before

ctrl-f "shows off" on the home page

Girls on tour: Danielle Lloyd confidently shows off her AA cup cleavage as she enjoys the last few days of her hen party
Finally found a plan that works! TOWIE's Cara Kilbey shows off her bikini body in Marbs after kicking her yo-yo dieting habit
Looking good
No-one's looking at your hair! Kim Kardashian tries out a short wig as she shows off her curves in corseted dress for new shoot
Making the girls green with envy! Denise Van Outen shows off her beach body in Dubai
You don't need to stand out even more! Ricky Whittle shows off his toned torso in a pair of neon pink board shorts
Holly Willoughby shows off her award winning cleavage in a revealing dress on The Voice
You're missing a medallion! Simon Cowell shows off his hairy chest on BGT final
Through the diet! Chaka Khan shows off her new waistline as she sheds 60 pounds
Angling for a new job? Aliona Vilani looks like a Baywatch star as she shows off her best beach poses
What were you inking? Teenager proudly shows off tattoo of London mayor Boris Johnson... and it cost £180

amazing.

What were you inking? Teenager proudly shows off tattoo of London mayor Boris Johnson... and it cost £180

kinda wanna read this one though.

http://www.newstatesman.com/blogs/media/2012/06/how-i-sued-daily-mail-and-won

http://www.newstatesman.com/blogs/staggers/2012/06/mail-online-illustrates-eiffel-tower-suicide-story-video-0

"The Eiffel Tower. Photo: Getty Images"

https://fbcdn-sphotos-a.akamaihd.net/hphotos-ak-ash3/539674_516177172243_1006022873_n.jpg

The Daily Mail has described her as "Mr Hague's formidable £70,000-a-year special adviser and long-standing chief of staff", and as "Hague's 'blue-eyed Bosnian Muslim émigré'".[2]

I think we can be sure however that you will never find him sharing a hotel bed with her

http://www.newstatesman.com/blogs/media/2012/08/mail-online-unemployed-graduates-arbeit-macht-frei

"The German slogan “Arbeit Macht Frei” is somewhat tainted by its connection with Nazi concentration camps, but its essential message, “work sets you free” still has something serious to commend it."

yes just SOMEWHAT tainted :o

jaw dropping

There is dignity to be gained from any job, no matter how menial, and for young people at the start of their careers, there are valuable lessons to be learned from any form of employment, whether that is on the factory floor, on a supermarket till or in the contemporary hard labour camp of a merchant bank or law office.

So much to unpack in this sentence too

this is just a blackhole of godwin's law trolling, right?

Paul Ryan's black ex-girlfriend Deneeta Pope 'spent five months in prison for $77000 fraud'

Revealed: Paul Ryan's black ex-girlfriend who opened his eyes to racism 'spent five months in prison for $77000 fraud'

stay classy

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2203009/Guatemalan-child-killer-burnt-death-schools-patio-mob-rule-begans-Tactic.html

In the old days, actresses had enough class to not allow themselves to be photographed while pregnant.

- PP, l.a., United States, 18/9/2012 1:47