Conservapedia - An encyclopedia you can trust

Jesus compared with Hugo Chavez: Jesus prayed, "O Father, if You can, let this cup pass from Me. But don't do what I want, but rather what You want." Matthew 26:39. In contrast, Communist dictator "Hugo Chavez weeps and calls on God to spare his life." [1]

Question for evolutionists/atheists: Why do you futilely persist in preaching your nonsense? Your ideology is feeble, declining and doomed (See: Decline of atheism) and the Question evolution! campaign and its 15 questions for evolutionists will accelerate the decline of atheism.

"preaching"

Please note: Mitt Romney is not endorsed by Conservapedia

Willard Mitt Romney (born March 12, 1947) sometimes referred to as Multiple Choice Mitt(do to his frequent flip flopping) is a RINO (Republican in name only) and former governor of Massachusetts and wealthy (thru his family) U.S. businessman, is currently a contender in the 2012 Republican Primary and was first runner-up for the nomination in 2008.

Following the split of the first three major elections in the 2008 primaries, Ron Kaufman, a top adviser to Romney, stated that the battle between the top three candidates "is going to be like the Bataan Death March."

The Bataan Death March resulted in the death of approximately 9,000 prisoners of war during World War II, and has been labeled as a war crime.

Romney claims to maintains a stable marriage with his wife Ann, with whom he has five children.

http://conservapedia.com/Professor_values

The analytical rigour of the entire entry http://conservapedia.com/Liberalism is dazzling but this struck me as especially special:

Liberal conservatism is simply a variant of conservatism willing to allow for individual liberties, and, in a way, describes the ideology of the American Republican Party. Such examples of this obvious line of thought include the civil rights movement, when the Republican Party (and a few southern Democrats) just wanted to maintain the African American's right to have the choice of forced segregation.

gotta be a poe.

Tim Thomas hockey A conservative, Thomas declined to attend a ceremony staged by the Obama White House after Thomas's team won the Stanley Cup.[2] Thomas is a four-time NHL All-Star as a goalie - a great conservative position to play![3]

omg lol

http://conservapedia.com/Mystery:Was_Charles_Fefferman_Homeschooled%3F

lolol

Hahaha, thanks Charlie!

lolllll

this entire category is gold:

http://conservapedia.com/Category:Mystery

The term "eternity" rarely occurs in the Old Testament, and when it does occur it does not have the modern sense.

The Greek words for eternity, "aion" and "aionios", lack the full Christian meaning also.[1]

Jesus and his disciples mention "eternity" nearly 70 times in the New Testament. Was this a new concept that originated with Christianity?

Yes, let's just ignore the far older Egyptian & Occidental traditions. So this concept that we are defining solely according Christianity - did it originate with Christianity?

Occidental AND Oriental i mean

http://conservapedia.com/Mystery:Did_God_cause_the_unlikely_result_of_Tim_Tebow_ending_up_in_the_New_York_media_market%3F

O_o

Mystery:Why Do Non-Conservatives Exist?

Debate:Listing the Earth's most pressing needs in urgent order of fixing

1) preventing gay marriage 2) preventing abortion 3) putting the 10 commandments in schools 4) convincing the global scientific community that evolution is false 5) defeating terrorism indefinitely and continuously 6) stopping liberals 7) keeping guns 8) stopping socialised health care 9) preventing environmentalist lies from damaging America's economy 10) making the speed of light more scriptural 11) abolishing public education 12) promoting conservative facts

gotta go with "making the speed of light more scriptural" at #1 I think

c for christ

They forgot "promoting homeschooling."

sorry for the obvious ad hominem blast but fuck these incredible dicks. I have seriously had it up to here with idiot conservatives

their troll game is way next level - the conservapedia bible project is just incredible, if you read the page about it you'll...you know, don't, just trust me, it's completely insane

maybe later, i don't want to angry up my entire week

10) making the speed of light more scriptural

This sounds cool!

The earliest, most authentic manuscripts of the Gospel According to Luke lack this verse fragment set forth at the start of Luke 23:34:[13]

Jesus said, "Father, forgive them, for they do not know what they are doing."

Is this a corruption of the original, perhaps promoted by liberals without regard to its authenticity? This does not appear in any other Gospel, and the simple fact is that some of the persecutors of Jesus did know what they were doing.

What really amazes me is the number of people who really believe in the idea of a trustworthy conservative encyclopedia, and are then disillusioned when Andy Schlafly calls them liberals for attempting to point out that maybe Sharon Tate wasn't a victim of "Hollywood Values."

So God created gigantic crocodile-like creatures, and made the waters teem with every moving creature after its kind, and every winged bird after its kind. God deemed this good.

I feel like something is lost in translation.

god deemed this wicked sick

http://conservapedia.com/Evolutionists_who_have_had_problems_with_being_overweight_and/or_obese

lolomgwtf

Also:

Considering his major themes, Shakespeare is undoubtedly a conservative figure by today's standards. Major conservative themes in his works include the sacred nature of the familial structure in King Lear, the recognition of God in his plays and personal life, the existence of necessary war in The Famous Life of King Henry V, and the exposed injustice of taxation in Coriolanus. Not surprisingly, modern liberal literary critics often ignore these themes because of their place on the modern political spectrum.

"As of May 2011, Richard Dawkins and Sam Harris have not publicly commented on the significant problems the New Atheism leadership has experienced in terms of overweight members."

Conservative Bible isn't very conservative with it's exclamation points.

Tribalism rarely gets painted in such bright bold colors

This shit always makes me think of this:

Mayor Quimby, you're well-known, sir, for your lenient stance on
crime. But suppose for a second that _your_ house was ransacked
by thugs, _your_ family tied up in the basement with socks in
their mouths, you try to open the door but there's too much
_blood_ on the knob --
Quimby: What is your question?
Barlow: My question is about the budget, sir.

conservapvmic

Mystery:Why would a loving God send people to hell for eternity?
Mystery:Young Hollywood Breast Cancer Victims
Mystery:why do capacitors fail on motherboards, but less so on power supplies?

No mystery too esoteric or controversial for these fearless investigators.

Sin is a crime of infinite intensity. That’s why the sinner must go to hell forever. It is such an aggravated crime that it can never be paid for. Sin is an infinite crime demanding infinite punishment from an infinite Holy God who has been infinitely insulted by our infinite crime and rebellion against Him, and what all this actually displays is His infinite love for humanity and his infinite hatred against sin.

i'm actually learning here. (learning how much of an infinite dick these people's god is.)

Debate:Listing the Earth's most pressing needs in urgent order of fixing

1) preventing gay marriage 2) preventing abortion 3) putting the 10 commandments in schools 4) convincing the global scientific community that evolution is false 5) defeating terrorism indefinitely and continuously 6) stopping liberals 7) keeping guns 8) stopping socialised health care 9) preventing environmentalist lies from damaging America's economy 10) making the speed of light more scriptural 11) abolishing public education 12) promoting conservative facts

This has to be a poll. That 10 will win in a landslide.

This has to be a poll. That 10 will win in a landslide.

would vote.

The term "eternity" rarely occurs in the Old Testament, and when it does occur it does not have the modern sense.

The Greek words for eternity, "aion" and "aionios", lack the full Christian meaning also.[1]

Jesus and his disciples mention "eternity" nearly 70 times in the New Testament. Was this a new concept that originated with Christianity?

Yes, let's just ignore the far older Egyptian & Occidental traditions. So this concept that we are defining solely according Christianity - did it originate with Christianity?

― Emperor Cos Dashit (Adam Bruneau), Monday, May 14, 2012 12:15 AM (11 hours ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

Also that Jesus the New Testament was written in Greek (as [1] points out), making the third statement nonsense. The page was created by Schafly, of course.

Also that Jesus

These guys are great examples of what Frank Schaeffer talks about Jesus victims and how the children of religious rightwingers can often be even more batshit than the parents. Doubling-down helps to cover up the nagging doubts in ones head about the way one was raised or the horseshit indoctrinated into one's head.

seems like 7) would be key to tackling a few of the others

If the devil is 6..

this one just sounds, sooo, idk: 12) promoting conservative facts
aka, disseminating our bat-shit propaganda.

conservapedia is just andrew schlafly talking to himself, but even that is sorta entertaining

Yeah, I like how facts can have an ideology.

haaa

http://rationalwiki.org/wiki/Andrew_Schlafly

He was lead counsel for the committees to recall US Senator Robert Menendez (D-NJ)[24] and US Senator Kent Conrad (D-ND).[25] In both cases, Schlafly argued that although recall for Senators was never provided for in the Constitution of the United States, a letter George Washington had written to his nephew indicated his "sincere" personal support for the idea, and therefore recall should have been considered implicit. In both cases, the New Jersey Supreme Court ruling on November 18, 2010[26] and the North Dakota Supreme Court on December 21, 2010[27] dismissed the petitions before them.