Human Extinction Scenarios

children are innocent
a teenager's fucked up in the head
adults are even more fucked up
and elderlies are like children

will there be another race
to come along and take over for us?
maybe martians could do
better than we've done
we'll make great pets!

my friend says we're like the dinosaurs
only we are doing ourselves in
much faster than they
ever did
we'll make great pets!

think if you were in Pirates! you'd never get to settle down

Like, is total nuclear annihilation even still on the table, other than in our 1980s memories?

Shrieks – Some form of posthumanity is attained but it is an extremely narrow band of what is possible and desirable.

Welcome to your new transhuman digitally uploaded computationally unlimited immortal existence - © Microsoft!

Like, is total nuclear annihilation even still on the table, other than in our 1980s memories?

total annihilation is unlikely absent huge stockpiles deployed by national actors. even a small-scale nuclear exchange (between, say, Israel and Iran, or Pakistan and India, or North and South Korea) would severely fuck things up. but humanity would soldier on.

are we talking literal extinction as in not one human left, because i dont think many of these would cut the mustard

― these pretzels are makeing me horney (Hungry4Ass), Thursday, April 5, 2012 5:17 PM (39 minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

they're divided up into four categories: Bangs, Crunches, Shrieks and Whimpers:

Bangs – Earth-originating intelligent life goes extinct in relatively sudden disaster resulting from either an accident or a deliberate act of destruction.
Crunches – The potential of humankind to develop into posthumanity[7] is permanently thwarted although human life continues in some form.

Shrieks – Some form of posthumanity is attained but it is an extremely narrow band of what is possible and desirable.

Whimpers – A posthuman civilization arises but evolves in a direction that leads gradually but irrevocably to either the complete disappearance of the things we value or to a state where those things are realized to only a minuscule degree of what could have been achieved.

― 1986 tallest hair contest (Z S)

in terms of "likelihood" + potential to actually make man extinct i'm going w/ asteroid/comet over physics disaster and space invaders

We’re living in a simulation and it gets shut down

the simulation argument is outstanding:

This paper argues that at least one of the following propositions is true: (1) the human species is very likely to go extinct before reaching a “posthuman” stage; (2) any posthuman civilization is extremely unlikely to run a significant number of simulations of their evolutionary history (or variations thereof); (3) we are almost certainly living in a computer simulation.

http://www.simulation-argument.com/simulation.html

iain banks turns it into a religion in one of his books (their core belief is that we are in a sim and if they get enough converts believing this, running the sim will become pointless and it will get shut down)

I hope earth human civilization ends due to superintelligent ants and their ability to construct geometric solids like in PHASE IV

http://www.goofbutton.com/images/phase_iv%20%2835%29.jpg

I will also once again seize the opportunity to link the classic Excerpts from
Expert Judgement on Markers to Deter Inadvertent Human Intrusion into the Waste Isolation Pilot Plant

http://downlode.org/Etext/WIPP/sickening.gif

Oh god, I love that WIPP thing so so much.

MENACING EARTHWORKS

Asteroid is the obvious candidate for sudden extinction. For a somewhat more lingering extinction, that would be rampant global warming. Most of the others are unduly influenced by sci-fi or some kind of futurist twaddle.

sometimes I sorta want an asteroid to come hurling at us because then all the world governments and top scientists would all be working together to find a way to stop it and we would come up w/ some crazy missile project and when it worked everyone in the world would celebrate together in the biggest party ever

there would be so much sex

instead we are just gonna sit around while the world warms and say 'not it' until it's too late and there's not even a party

really tho, think about the party, it would be like if every country in the world won the world cup at the same time

missing option: widespread adoption of teledildonics

sadly, i think it might be a bit more violent than that xp

it would suck if you fell into a coma or something for a week and then when you woke up you realized you missed the best party in human history

it would suck if you fell into a coma or something for a week and then when you woke up you realized that the rest of the world had been destroyed

destroyed by the party? I guess that would be pretty ironic

sure

Automatic thread bump. This poll is closing tomorrow.

Automatic thread bump. This poll world is closing tomorrow.

Download complete

Non-zero probability of it happening

"takeover by a transcending upload" is probably my favorite deus ex ending so that one

May I recommend an old favorite website exitmundi.nl which collected a bunch of end of the world scenarios a decade ago....

Bangs Crunches Shrieks and Whimpers sounds like a gym workout

I think we should put together an ilxor world fap readiness plan for when the end of world announcement is made
We all meet in...um...Brussels* at the stroke of midnight. deal? Okay.

*it was the first place I thought of, can replace with agreed upon city.

New York, duh. We have the best zombies.

god forbid new Yorkers ever leave new York, how could I forget :)

voted gray goo

voted transcending upload
why bc it looks interesting

http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/en/thumb/c/c4/Colossus_the_forbin_project_movie_poster.jpg/220px-Colossus_the_forbin_project_movie_poster.jpg

^^^ one of the best "superintelligent computer" movies, not a transcendent upload though but certainly a self-improving computer. But it turns out not to result in the extinction of all mankind, just our enslavement.

Nuclear annihlation still seems totally possible and could happen at the shortest drop of a hat, one wrong button press and that's that. New plague and/or evil nanobots also could basically happen, right?

Not sure I buy global warming as an extinction level event as opposed to just a decline and fall of modern life as we know it

Yeah, I feel like as long as nuclear weapons are still lying around, the potential for nuclear annihilation still exists.

everyone in the world would celebrate together in the biggest party ever

Not everyone; the "left behind" folks and other armegeddonish types would be way-bummed.

Destruction by ETs is my favourite => foolish arrogant earthlings thinking that we're kings of the universe and all that. Congratulations, Planet Xmorphion-93Q - what can we way, the better team won!

"Armageddon-ish"

voted nuclear holocaust for nostalgia's sake.

i dont think nuclear annihilation is considered possible, there simply aren't enough nukes on the planet (probably never were)

there never were enough nukes, old man. there never were. *kicks dust*

http://gizmodo.com/5899569/how-many-nukes-would-it-take-to-blow-up-the-entire-planet

Of course, none of these figures take fallout and other atmospheric effects into account—just square mileage blown away. So it'd actually, technically, require fewer warheads to exterminate our species. But that's irrelevant, Maximilian points out: "There are an estimated total of 20,500 nuclear warheads in the world today. If the average power of these devices is 33,500 Kilotons, there are enough to destroy the total earth landmass." And why do we need so many of these things again?

This website looks like it'd be good for many of these topics: http://armageddononline.tripod.com/nuclear.htm

i like physics disasters, among a bunch of disenchanting punishments for hubris wherein we insignificantly fizzle out, it'd be nice to prove our importance by DESTROYING THE ENTIRE UNIVERSE.

worried about this poll ending

ends with us all being raptured

Polls tend to end in a whimper

world will be ended by dozens of lurkers all voting at once

d3athdr0n3 maybe

Will say that theorizing about this stuff is not necessarily removed from being personally invested in it. If you plant and nurture a garden, you also do well to anticipate the weather.

― Kim

i mean i think that's a good analogy! some people like freak out and stress about the weather and like who does that benefit? every time there's sprinkles on the forecast people are like "SNOWPOCALYPSE" and they run out and strip the shelves bare of paint thinner because the world is going to end, now's our last chance to buy paint thinner. yeah, i get it, winter is coming, maybe preparations can be a little bit more practical? also where i am i'm in the middle of a fucking blizzard right now and i don't give a shit about the fact that winter is coming, i'm sorry, i'm kinda busy here. and i point that out and people get all mad and are like, well, if you had your way, it'd be winter _now_. uh, what?

quit worrying about whether humanity has a future and start fucking _living_.

What does start fucking _living_ consist of though ? What do you do differently ?

― Luna Schlosser

that's a good question, it's different for everybody of course but here's some of what it looks like for me

i do a lot of work on healing trauma, with a heavy focus on healing guilt and shame. lots of mindfulness practice, circle of control stuff. i had a lot of issues with rumination and spiraling, getting into patterns of intense anxiety about things i couldn't actually do anything about. refocusing those worries into the things i _could_ affect and control has given me agency over my own life, rather than making me feel like a pawn of enormous forces outside my control.

i've also become a lot more focused on local community. a lot of the past year i've been working on building up a discord for trans folks where i live. it's only a really really small subsection of all the trans folks where i live, but i think it's been really healthy and rewarding. community is really important for trans folks but online trans communities aren't always the healthiest places - particularly on corporate social media sites, there's a focus on Discourse, which means conflict, and personally i try to minimize conflict where i can.

of course that doesn't mean that i _avoid_ conflict - i mean, this is a conflict right now - but when i do so i try to do it in a way that builds empathy, being honest and vulnerable rather than making with the zings. zings are entertaining in the short term, but in the long term they do tend to hurt other people, and that's more important to me than the transitory entertainment they provide.

minimizing conflict is another use of mindfulness practice for me - a lot of times people will say things that will get me upset and i have learned to kind of sit with those feelings and let them pass before i make a rash and hasty response.

when i talk with other people, i've moved away from centering rhetoric in general to trying to listen to other people and engage with them on an emotional level. i think a lot of times when people talk they get hung up on theory and i'm a lot more interested in how people are feeling, in providing care. providing care is really important to me. it's one of the ways i find meaning in my life. i was suffering a lot, and there were other people who took the time to help me, to care for me, to help me understand things about myself, and i just try to pass that on, to do the same for other people in any community i'm a part of.

as a result of my decentering of rhetoric, i don't engage a lot with political threads, and this seems like basically a political thread. when i do, what i try to do is reframe the conversation from abstract ideas to concrete, real-world experiences. mainly i draw this from my lived experience as a trans woman, because that's the concrete, real-world experience i have. at the same time, i try to take care to not universalize my own experience, to try not to set out my particular experiences as normative in any way.

i strongly believe that the way people think about "politics" is broken, not just in terms of structural systems of oppression but in the political norms we've internalized, what we see as "political" and "not political". i agree, actually, with viborg that what's needed is a paradigm shift. for me, that paradigm shift consists of moving away from a politics based on abstract universal ideals and towards a politics based on solidarity, on acknowledges the differences in our lived experiences and working to ally with each other for our mutual benefit.

the strongest and most profound political act i have undertaken, an act i continue to replicate on a daily basis, is my existence as a queer person. it's hard to explain how deeply this has affected me, how deeply my experience as a queer person has _changed_ me. of course, it's not my _responsibility_ to, but you asked a sincere question and i want to answer it to the best of my ability.

there is something incredibly powerful and transformative about being an out queer person. for me to exist, i first had to throw out a lot of the assumptions i'd made, and for me, my political assumptions were liberal. the beliefs i'd been taught, the beliefs i'd tried to put into practice as a "cisgender heterosexual man", had _never_ really served me, had _never_ really been to my benefit, and when i came out as a trans woman, i found these political norms to be laughably inadequate. a _lot_ of trans and queer people are strongly leftist, are avowedly anticapitalist, and i think cishet liberals maybe don't understand why that is, don't understand the damage their ideals have done, the ways in which queer people have performed, in many cases continue to perform, self-erasure in order to accommodate these ideals. don't understand the way the norms they seek to defend promote and perpetuate these broken, toxic ideals. liberals are willing to acknowledge our right to exist, but _not_ to cede the power of self-determination to us. recognition of us is, it is clear to many of us, a privilege, one that can be revoked at their pleasure. liberals see themselves as our protectors, the ones who carry the burden, the ones with great power and great responsibility, and _nobody_ can carry that burden, _nobody_ can live up to that responsibility.

i've put down the burden. i've given up trying to "save the world". my life now is focused on taking care of myself as best i can and caring for the people i am in community with. that's _really really different_ from how i lived my life before.

"Like, have you seen Mongolia? Wyoming? Iowa? Saskatchewan? There's tons of places with almost nobody there."

As mentioned passim I visited Greenland in May, and I remember that the in-flight magazine was unusually upbeat about climate change:
https://i.imgur.com/gBresVj.jpg

I guess the lesson is that one man's meat is another man's mustard, or mookie. I can't remember how the saying goes. From what I remember Greenland itself would be largely unaffected by a rise in sea levels. If the massive ice sheet melted it would be disastrous for the rest of the world, but without the weight of the ice Greenland's interior would rise, albeit on an enormously long timescale. Of course the ultra-rich will probably ride it out in mega-yachts, which might explain why they're so willing to plunge huge amounts of money into something that depreciates so badly.

The isolation really brought home how unlikely human life was. The birds and animals I saw in Greenland had been around longer than us, and they hadn't developed writing; the dinosaurs that preceded them didn't develop writing over the course of hundreds of millions of years. We alone developed writing, and by extension a means whereby the dead could communicate with the living. That was our triumph over death.

My hunch is that in the far future we will end up like the Inuit, roving bands scattered in the temperate zone, hoarding rubber and glass. I remember an old book called Man Plus in which a man is surgically engineered to survive on Mars, but that's not a feasible solution to the problem of life in a world too hot for life. In the long run all life on Earth is dependent on the sun, which has a finite amount of fuel. We might put off our date with the inevitable by relocating to Mars, but that will be the end of us. The stars themselves also have a finite amount of fuel, so long-term survival in the physical world is impossible.

My suggestion is that everybody have a go at The Talos Principle. It's a puzzle game, but the storyline is unusually melancholic. It deals with the extension of humanity and its attempt to cast a light into the future so that something survives.

The choice was about how many children to have. The elegance and grace was about being free to choose. Giving way to other species was wondering about what happens when one is not present and imagining one's absence.

were sorry I thought of them together

https://www.washingtonpost.com/science/2025/02/02/asteroid-hit-earth/

sweet url

On Wednesday, an unprecedented memo from the International Asteroid Warning Network reached the United Nations Office for Outer Space Affairs and from there winged across the planet to government officials. The memo said “Asteroid 2024 YR4,” first detected in late December after it came out of the sun’s glare and passed by the Earth, might hit our planet on Dec. 22, 2032.

The likelihood of impact was very low, just 1.3 percent. But that probability, combined with the estimated size of the rock — possibly big enough to cover a football field from goal line to goal line — was unusual enough to trigger for the first time the international warning system established in 2013.

Astronomers are making further observations and refining calculations for future orbits of Asteroid 2024 YR4. By Friday, the impact probability has edged upward to 1.6 percent.

That did not surprise astronomers, because such increases typically happen early in the observing process. What’s also typical is that the probability of an impact eventually drops down again, all the way to zero, as astronomers refine their forecasts.

“There’s a 98.4 percent chance, as of today, that it will go to zero,” Paul Chodas, director of the Center for Near-Earth Object Studies at NASA’s Jet Propulsion Laboratory, said Friday. (By Saturday, the impact probability ticked up to 1.7 percent.)

i see you reading this, i know what you're thinking here: how will i tell my children? look, if you're gonna talk to your children about this, just tell them "Asteroid 2024 YR4 certainly does not pose an existential risk to civilization — it’s not nearly big enough. But it would deliver a significant punch if it struck Earth. Astronomers initially estimated its diameter as roughly 130 to 300 feet."

wish you hadn't bumped this. that asteroid isn't NEARLY big enough!!!

i had hoped for bigger! one thing that goes unmentioned during those scenarios is the fish. "70% chance that the asteroid will hit the water, ocean, etc"...that's great and everything, but how does that feel for fish?

2032 is plenty of lead time to send Ben Affleck to deflect this thing, or given the football-field scale of it, the entire Manning clan. For a 1% chance at saving the world, it is totally worth a one-way trip!