ok lets all shit our pants to something new: post 2005 horror film thread

(cross-posted and rewritten from the human centipede thread)

The Human Centipede 2 (2011, d. Tom Six)

Well, I didn't like it. It lives up to its billing and outdoes its predecessor in the "truly revolting" department, but is also a rather joyless chore. Where The Human Centipede gave us a comically unforgettable monster and encouraged us to sympathetically identify with his victims, the sequel is a a much less engaging proposition. Tom Six displays no interest in any of his characters save Martin, the film's pathetic, deranged and seemingly retarded villain. Martin's many victims are, for the most part, mere bodies. We know nothing about them, and they seem to exist only as mute and helpless torture subjects. We cringe at the abuse they suffer, but that's about it. The film's exclusive focus on Martin, the subject of almost every shot that doesn't represent his point of view, unfortunately robs The Human Centipede 2 of any real suspense. We're no longer trapped down there in the basement with the mad doctor's victims, hoping for the best but dreading the worst. Instead, we're watching from over the shoulder of a repulsive ghoul as he goes about his repetitive business, wondering how bad it's going to get. And it gets pretty horrible.

Laurence R. Harvey, who plays Martin, is the film's biggest asset and its weakest link. Physically, he's a riveting grotesque, but the character he portrays is so pathetic and one-dimensional that he quickly becomes tiresome. Martin sweats and frets. He lumbers fatly about and he rolls his veiny, boiled-egg popeyes while emitting an awful mewling sound. That's about it. For an hour and a half. He's like the Eraserhead baby as a grown up, murderous pervert, and his capacity to fascinate is as limited as you might imagine.

In terms of overall narrative arc and general tone, this film isn't too terribly far removed from its predecessor. It starts out as a black-hearted, deeply grotesque horror comedy but then dives at the halfway point into crushingly bleak & dismal full-on torture porn. And yeah, that's a perfectly fair description of what's going on here, as far as I'm concerned. Six's sequel is a good deal more graphic than The Human Centipede, reveling in the splattering shit and gory mutilations the first film only implied. On the other hand, it's never anywhere near as plausible as its predecessor, so the emotional impact of all the onscreen offal is fairly minimal. It's simply sickening, but undeniably effective on that score. I will say that it's a somewhat interesting, ambitious and even a clever film, though I can't explain how or why this is so without spoiling its best ideas. Potentially worth a look if you're a jaded gorehound with a stomach of iron, but recommended to no one.

^ only movie that really makes good on the thread title, imo

also, cuz fuck a spoiler, no matter how sleazy, cynical and repulsive six's films may be, he's been braver and more honest than most in explicitly admitting the pornographic aspects of "torture porn" as a genre. the human centipede 2 frames its predecessor as a horror film with which martin is sexually obsessed (cleverly retconning that film's often bad acting into a kind of jokey verisimilitude), and we eventually figure out that most everything we see in the sequel is simply a nonsensical erotic fantasy that the human centipede has inspired in martin's deranged mind.

Haven't seen the sequel, but a friend of mine noted how impressed he was at the total contrast with its predecessor. That is, the first is sort of slick and sterile, and relatively restrained (given the subject matter), yet the second is totally grungy and septic, and explicit (especially given the subject matter). That's got to be by design, though what it means, I can't say.

Has anyone else seen "Rare Exports?" Easily the best twisted Christmas horror film since "Gremlins."

http://dailydead.com/david-gordon-greens-surpiria-remake-is-official/

Nooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo!

after they remade texas chainsaw massacre I just don't give a frig anymore. go ahead, remake eraserhead, I don't care.

yeah, wicker man was my dgas breaking point, can no longer muster so much as a disgruntled expression

Well at least its dd green? He can do good work sometimes. Great work with the right material.

Wait waht

This is the dude that brought us pineapple express and your highness, he is officially fucking terrible

lol you saw Your Highness

(xpost) Enh, even if you're a fan of Hooper's Texas Chainsaw 2 (I'm not) those 90s followups were pretty bad, way before the remake and the prequel. The "brand" has been compromised for quite some time. 3D one on the way this year. No thanks.

George Washington and All the Real Girls are both great movies and i will ride for pineapple express

ok i have not seen either of those. cant get behind pineapple express myself though, and even if i could that movie gives me zero optimism abt the dude handling suspiria well, which despite its O_O moments works with a lot of subtlety, which pineapple express has none of.

DGG's career suggests the movie he should be remaking is Body Snatchers.

or white zombie maybe

Or "the stuff"

Or Children Shouldn't Play with Dead Things.

Why remake Susperia? The movie is renowned for it's visual style, not it's script. Who's doing the remake Return to Reason? Jon Favreau?

This thread is hard to search for!

Anyway, "Cabin in the Woods:" what a weird fucking movie. Like "Tucker and Dale" meets ... "Cube?" Tips its hand to its best gag early, not sure I like where the film ends up. Reminds me a bit too much of Ben Stiller's "Low-Budget Tales of Cliched Horror" bit. Everybody see it so we can discuss.

I liked Tucker & Dale. Not to your point. I just wanted to post that I had a good laugh and was charmed by the movie.

CITW was fun, but felt like more of a stoned undergradute cultural studies thesis paper than a movie at times.

I wish they had more fun having fun with it, or found a better way to reveal just what was going on. By the end I was thinking of these sort of every which way but loose VHS b-movies like "Return of the Living Dead III" and "Waxwork."

(I liked Tucker & Dale a lot, too! This one had some fun with cliche subversion, but less consistently so)

I liked CITW. Merman gag was pretty solid.

Merman gag was ace. Motorcycle into barrier gag would have been good had they not revealed said barrier so early with that eagle.

i think it was pretty lolsome that you knew it was coming.

cabin in the woods was fun shit, it was pretty fucking goofy but had some genuinely startling moments, fran kranz + bradley whitford = gold.

i think it was pretty lolsome that you knew it was coming.

You mean, it was funnier knowing he would fail? In that case, I don't they pulled the gag off that well. They could have had a Sam Jackson in "Deep Blue Sea" moment, but nope.

This was so Fran Kranz's movie, and if I ever saw it again - and I'm not sure why I would need to see it again - I'd see it for him. Some dude on etsy I'm sure is getting right on that travel-bong.

I actually really appreciated Ebert's key takeaway:

This is not a perfect movie; it's so ragged, it's practically constructed of loose ends. But it's exciting because it ventures so far off the map.

Also, a bit miffed at all the reviews who characterize these college kids as dummies. They're all actually pretty smart - Thor as an econ wiz was worth a chuckle, and I actually liked when the other hunk put on his smart glasses to look at something - but their behavior is directed contrary to said smarts. They're literally made to behave like dummies

thought cabin was pretty great. speakerphone gag was perfect

Yeah, a big point was making them into the stereotypes. Also Rex Reed not getting the Final Girl wasn't actually a virgin was pretty wtf (except not coz its Rex Reed but you know).

Wasn't quite sure why the victims are allowed to "win," or why all the other countries seemed to have failed/succeeded, persevering over evil, given what's at stake. I suppose all those unanswerable loose ends constitute a big part of its ridiculous charm. Regardless, the Japanese schoolgirls got the biggest laugh when I saw it.

hahaha. the japanese thing killed me.

Wait, was this 3-D?

no. it was going to be, but due to MGM clusterfuck we were spared that indignity.

saw cabin in the woods early this afternoon. dug it a lot, though i can't quite say it's great. i do have this advice: if you have any interest in it at all, do not read anything about it, do not talk to your friends about it, do not wait for DVD, do not read this thread, just go.

lol rex reed http://www.observer.com/2012/04/cabin-in-the-woods-rex-reed-richard-jenkins-bradley-whitford/

(spoilers within)

I'll second contenderizer.

I doubt if these people even know who Sigourney Weaver is.

here's a screenshot of the betting board from cabin: http://i.imgur.com/BQaLg.jpg

sold when i saw "angry molesting tree"

The way the opening scene cut to the title: Funny Games?

lol Deadites

yeah i thought of funny games too, though where haneke is a stern moralizer who wants to chasten his audience, cabin in the woods gives the horror audience more of a gentle ribbing

Good to have that screenshot. I only caught a glimpse of "dismemberment goblins", which was enough for a laugh.

"Reptilius" would have been damn awesome.

You can't see it on there, but I think one category was just called "Kevin." I don't know if that's supposed to be like Freddy, Michael or Jason, or just some fictional ... Kevin.