TEENAGE MUTANT NINJA TURTLES MICHAEL BAY REBOOT (2014)

i liked the cartoonishly menacing minimalism of those pipe levels, all the black and green and space. i hated the cloud world tho the secrets in those levels were too punishing and unrewarding (all those finnick-y jumps!)

but i also really liked the snakeman levels of mega man

Ha its only recently (with a modded PSP that has most of the NES games on it that my sister had) that I've gotten the hang of any of the Mega Man games...

I spent a lot of time drawing my own World 7 pipe mazes as a kid but part of the thrill was just having mastered freestyling pictures of overlapping contoured tubes.

Ok that's awesome; my prior groans about World 7 aesthetics be damned

Next Week: Just ninja aliens but they're still green.

Since the character in the movie are alien life forms, they can't really be "turtles", can they? And since they come from another planet, which presumably doesn't have a perfect equivalent of Japan and Japanese culture, they can't be "ninjas" either. So logically the new movie should be called Aliens.

lol otm

Hoping someone will make a companion piece called Teenage Mutant. But I guess that's basically Toxic Avenger.

the comics and cartoons had so many levels of intergalactic and inter-dimensional travel, i could see the alien thing working even if its a departure from the origin story

Paramount marketing changed the name. They made the title simple. The characters you all remember are exactly the same, and yes they still act like teenagers. Everything you remember, why you liked the characters, is in the movie. This script is being developed by two very smart writers, with one of the original creators of Ninja Turtles. They care VERY MUCH about making this film for the fans. Everyone on this team cares about the fans. Just give them a chance. Jonathan the director, is a major fan of the whole franchise. HE'S NOT GOING TO LET YOU DOWN.

http://www.grantland.com/blog/hollywood-prospectus/post/_/id/46536/michael-bay-must-be-stopped-ninja-turtles-drop-%E2%80%98teenage%E2%80%99

Look, it’s great that Eastman, the original cocreator, gets a say (and a paycheck!) in this latest blasphemization/reinvention. But, like, if Paul McCartney wanted to re-release The White Album with, say, a 14-minute Lil B verse on every song, the mass-mind wouldn’t be cool with that, either.

at this point I want Bay to replace them with My Little Ponies just to watch online fandom implode

anyone who goes to see this must value meaning over pleasure.

are you sure it's not the other way around?

or is it truth over sleeping

there's a certain espirit de corps or instant kinship that develops under conditions of shared suffering and i think a lot of people have chosen michael bay movies and star wars prequels to facilitate this.

lol TMNT is not the Beatles

there's four of them and they're heavily influenced by eastern philosophy, and master splinter looks like brian epstein.

I had to double check the MMT album cover to make sure one of them wasn't wearing a turtle mask.

hahah

what's the over/under on whether Raphael says "sup bitches"

there's going to be a small turtle humping someone's leg in this

i swear to god if these turtle/aliens dont love pepperoni pizza i dont know what i ill do... theres go my childhood... no point in living

otm

truthbomb

do you guys have a preference of which pizza chain gets the endorsement prize?

i guess just not one of the ones that fund abortion bombers

although i suppose if the movie bombs than it just less money for abortion clinic bombings so idk

i'm gonna take a wild guess -- that's dominoes isn't it?

are you telling me that papa john's is telling me what to do with the human body??

Ving Rhames as Shredder

"It’s so funny — if everyone was such a die-hard fan, they would know that the TCRI canisters where the ooze comes from. That is alien ooze."

many why did the turtles have to be green...not gonna lie kinda ruined it

http://allhiphop.com/2012/04/09/hip-hop-rumors-is-kid-cudi-starring-in-the-teenage-mutant-ninja-turtles-movie/

hint hint mane

we are including everything that made you become fans in the first place. We are just building a richer world we are including everything that made you become fans in the first place. We are just building a richer world we are including everything that made you become fans in the first place. We are just building a richer world we are including everything that made you become fans in the first place. We are just building a richer world we are including everything that made you become fans in the first place. We are just building a richer world we are including everything that made you become fans in the first place. We are just building a richer world we are including everything that made you become fans in the first place. We are just building a richer world we are including everything that made you become fans in the first place. We are just building a richer world we are including everything that made you become fans in the first place. We are just building a richer world we are including everything that made you become fans in the first place. We are just building a richer world we are including everything that made you become fans in the first place. We are just building a richer world we are including everything that made you become fans in the first place. We are just building a richer world
http://i.imgur.com/LS2SY.jpgwe are including everything that made you become fans in the first place. We are just building a richer world we are including everything that made you become fans in the first place. We are just building a richer world we are including everything that made you become fans in the first place. We are just building a richer world we are including everything that made you become fans in the first place. We are just building a richer world we are including everything that made you become fans in the first place. We are just building a richer world we are including everything that made you become fans in the first place. We are just building a richer world we are including everything that made you become fans in the first place. We are just building a richer world we are including everything that made you become fans in the first place. We are just building a richer world we are including everything that made you become fans in the first place. We are just building a richer world we are including everything that made you become fans in the first place. We are just building a richer world we are including everything that made you become fans in the first place. We are just building a richer world we are including everything that made you become fans in the first place. We are just building a richer world we are including everything that made you become fans in the first place. We are just building a richer world we are including everything that made you become fans in the first place. We are just building a richer world

platinum dunes producer says ninja turtles may be mo-cap ala rise of the planet of the apes:

http://www.filmschoolrejects.com/features/brad-fuller-ninja-turtles-jgiro.php

Can't wait for this grounded film about ninja turtles.

The suits could now be a little cheesy in a modern setting.
Yeah, yeah, I don't think we're going to go in that direction.

Yes, CGI ninja turtles are in no way cheesy.

I would love to see some Hollywood mavericks go all-analogue with the effects now and then. I miss that shit.

otm.

Teenage Mutant Dogme 95 Turtles

Can't wait for this grounded film about ninja turtles.

― Emperor Cos Dashit (Adam Bruneau), Monday, 30 April 2012 21:07 (24 minutes ago) Permalink

Irony free over here.

Didn't know about the aliens and dropping of Teenage from the story and title. Feel like it's too late for me to get angry. Still ordering pizza tonite

i hope they get into their EMOTIONS

Teenage Mutant Emo Turtles

Hoping 1/3 of the film will be them training with new ninja master on a mountain top in Japan.

under a waterfall, with voiceover of koans

"does the shell protect you.... or do you.... protect... the shellllllllllllllll"

Definitely some helicopter flyovers.

Maybe they train on an aircraft carrier at sunset.

pizzas.