what to do when your roommate doesn't realize you're home and thusly is having loud sex in the living room

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An Old English hat! Good god.

― kirsten (kirsten), Tuesday, 13 April 2004 21:45 (twenty-two years ago)

"Note to Self:Don't Ass-Fuck on Your Roomie's Couch"

― Donna Brown (Donna Brown), Tuesday, 13 April 2004 21:46 (twenty-two years ago)

the hat was maroon and said "Old English" on it
my roommate is currently listening to "Rock n Roll" by Ryan Adams, the musical poet of romantic ass sex!

Yay! One more thing to shout out to Ryan Adams at his next concert!

― donut bitch (donut), Tuesday, 13 April 2004 21:48 (twenty-two years ago)

Luckily for me, my roommate doesn't have a couch. It's a futon.
PS - I am not entirely serious, probably.

― kirsten (kirsten), Tuesday, 13 April 2004 21:49 (twenty-two years ago)

To Be Young (is to be high,is to be rimming on my roomie's new couch)

― Doobie Keebler (Charles McCain), Tuesday, 13 April 2004 21:50 (twenty-two years ago)

"Note to Self:Don't Ass-Fuck on Your Roomie's Couch"
-- Donna Brown

I somehow read that as "Don't self ass-fuck on your roomie's couch"

― ipsofacto (ipsofacto), Tuesday, 13 April 2004 21:51 (twenty-two years ago)

That too.

― luna (luna.c), Tuesday, 13 April 2004 21:51 (twenty-two years ago)

Facists!

― oops (Oops), Tuesday, 13 April 2004 21:52 (twenty-two years ago)

Who then is the musical poet of buggery-interruptus?

― Michael White (Hereward), Tuesday, 13 April 2004 21:53 (twenty-two years ago)

"don't eat all my food, don't leave the door unlocked, don't take my cds without asking, don't assfuck on my couch" OH WHY WON'T YOU LET ME LIVE?!!?

― oops (Oops), Tuesday, 13 April 2004 21:53 (twenty-two years ago)

Haha! I am trying to think of what a "facist" could be. (I know it was just a typo and stuff.)
x-post

― kirsten (kirsten), Tuesday, 13 April 2004 21:53 (twenty-two years ago)

this thread has mentioned assspunk and cummy hinder and yet you can't think of what 'facist' could be?

― oops (Oops), Tuesday, 13 April 2004 21:55 (twenty-two years ago)

'Who then is the musical poet of buggery-interruptus?'

Butthole Surfers?

― ..., Tuesday, 13 April 2004 21:56 (twenty-two years ago)

I have had a long day. Tell me what a facist is.

― kirsten (kirsten), Tuesday, 13 April 2004 21:57 (twenty-two years ago)

quoting my favorite obscure song: "got a place in the hole"

― Donna Brown (Donna Brown), Tuesday, 13 April 2004 21:57 (twenty-two years ago)

Or maybe that describes everyone on this thread. (x-post)

― .., Tuesday, 13 April 2004 21:57 (twenty-two years ago)

GIVIN' HER THE OLD ENGLISH

― ASTROG! (deangulberry), Tuesday, 13 April 2004 21:59 (twenty-two years ago)

you sure it wasn't a Peterbilt hat?

― oops (Oops), Tuesday, 13 April 2004 22:00 (twenty-two years ago)

TELL ME.

― kirsten (kirsten), Tuesday, 13 April 2004 22:01 (twenty-two years ago)

http://store6.yimg.com/I/plushliving_1789_6820269.gif

???

― gygax! (gygax!), Tuesday, 13 April 2004 22:01 (twenty-two years ago)

Mack Truck (for Doggy-style)

― Doobie Keebler (Charles McCain), Tuesday, 13 April 2004 22:01 (twenty-two years ago)

This has been running through my head for the last hour:

We've been here too long
Tryin' to get along
Pretendin' that you're oh so shy
I'm a natural ma'am
Doin' all I can
My temperature is runnin' high

Cry at night
No one in sight
An' we got so much to share
Talking's fine
If you got the time
But I ain't got the time to spare
Yeah

Do you wanna touch (Yeah)
Do you wanna touch (Yeah)
Do you wanna touch me there, where
Do you wanna touch (Yeah)
Do you wanna touch (Yeah)
Do you wanna touch me there, where
There, yeah

Yeah, oh yeah, oh yeah

Every girl an' boy
Needs a little joy
All you do is sit an' stare
Beggin' on my knees
Baby, won't you please
Run your fingers through my hair

My, my, my
Whiskey and rye
Don't it make you feel so fine
Right or wrong
Don't it turn you on
Can't you see we're wastin' time, yeah

Do you wanna touch (Yeah)
Do you wanna touch (Yeah)
Do you wanna touch me there, where
Do you wanna touch (Yeah)
Do you wanna touch (Yeah)
Do you wanna touch me there, where
There, yeah

― luna (luna.c), Tuesday, 13 April 2004 22:02 (twenty-two years ago)

Hmm. Which one of us took the hat home that night?

― bnw (bnw), Tuesday, 13 April 2004 22:05 (twenty-two years ago)

I used to have a peterbilt belt buckle. But my dad owned a peterbilt truck SO IT WAS ACCEPTABLE.

― mandee, Tuesday, 13 April 2004 22:05 (twenty-two years ago)

"BJ and the Bear"

― Donna Brown (Donna Brown), Tuesday, 13 April 2004 22:07 (twenty-two years ago)

This thread is the most all-ILXors together thread ever! It's like we've ALL had anal sex with EVERYONE on this bitch!

― Markelby (Mark C), Tuesday, 13 April 2004 22:08 (twenty-two years ago)

50 cents says this whole thing is MADE UP

― stockholm cindy (Jody Beth Rosen), Tuesday, 13 April 2004 22:08 (twenty-two years ago)

Mandee, you should go on AIM. I am bored. Also, I love your dad.

― kirsten (kirsten), Tuesday, 13 April 2004 22:08 (twenty-two years ago)

Is anyone else doubting that this actually took place? I mean, everything is just *too* perfect. Gear, I don't know if I respect you more or less if you're making it up...

― Clarke B. (Clarke B.), Tuesday, 13 April 2004 22:09 (twenty-two years ago)

x-post with Jody

― Clarke B. (Clarke B.), Tuesday, 13 April 2004 22:09 (twenty-two years ago)

I mean, really, "Do me in the ass"?!

― Clarke B. (Clarke B.), Tuesday, 13 April 2004 22:10 (twenty-two years ago)

More importantly, who took home the BEAR from the later MYC FAP? And whose ass is going to be intruded upon in the bear's presence?

― donut bitch (donut), Tuesday, 13 April 2004 22:13 (twenty-two years ago)

I don't know, I think it would kind of be a turn-on to know one's roommate was ass-fucked on one's couch.

― Dan I. (Dan I.), Tuesday, 13 April 2004 22:13 (twenty-two years ago)

The thing is, you know Gears! bumsex-demanding flatmate would have got away with it 9 times out of 10. She thought he was out! Don't you all realise the likelihood that this is happening on your couch, when you're out, all the time. Frankly, I accepted the assspunk couch thing some time ago.

― N. (nickdastoor), Tuesday, 13 April 2004 22:15 (twenty-two years ago)

In fact, your roommate is probably up your ass right now.

― N. (nickdastoor), Tuesday, 13 April 2004 22:17 (twenty-two years ago)

It is likely made up or embellished. Gear! was behind those made up Craigslist haikus but whatever. BUTT WHATEVER HAHAHSA OMOM LGOLO

― ASTROG! (deangulberry), Tuesday, 13 April 2004 22:17 (twenty-two years ago)

Brilliant. I've read every single post on this bitch, back to back to BACK. Just. plain. BRILLIANT.

― Francis Watlington (Francis Watlington), Tuesday, 13 April 2004 22:24 (twenty-two years ago)

I mean, really, "Do me in the ass"?!

If you can think of a better way of requesting assfucking I'D LIKE TO HEAR IT.

― adam (adam), Tuesday, 13 April 2004 22:26 (twenty-two years ago)

"part my meaty hams of love and pound me with your assorted smallgoods"

― ipsofacto (ipsofacto), Tuesday, 13 April 2004 22:28 (twenty-two years ago)

'how about a little backdoor action?'

'mind shoving your cock up my poopchute?'

'hey rumpranger, hows about a little trip down the hershey highway?'

'damn baby, i can't live another moment without your throbbing wang in my butt'

'fuck my ass, bitch!'

Yeah, okay, I tried. I couldn't think of anything better. Also, allergy meds apparently make me weird. Er.

― luna (luna.c), Tuesday, 13 April 2004 22:30 (twenty-two years ago)

that is so beautiful it made me cry, ipso.

xpost
um, luna, you could benefit from some lessons from miss ipso.

― oops (Oops), Tuesday, 13 April 2004 22:31 (twenty-two years ago)

You know, in truth oops, finding ways to ask someone to fuck me in the ass isn't high on my list of things to do. If I want someone to do it, usually I just say 'hey, want to try anal?' or something equally bland.

― luna (luna.c), Tuesday, 13 April 2004 22:33 (twenty-two years ago)

what can i say? Sometimes you've got to try a little tenderness.

― ipsofacto (ipsofacto), Tuesday, 13 April 2004 22:33 (twenty-two years ago)

I thought anal sex would bring everyone on ILE together, but I was wrong.

― N. (nickdastoor), Tuesday, 13 April 2004 22:34 (twenty-two years ago)

I don't wanna be the "up-the-butt girl!"

― charlotte york (Jody Beth Rosen), Tuesday, 13 April 2004 22:35 (twenty-two years ago)

now you've made it sound like the evening special at Hardee's, luna.

― oops (Oops), Tuesday, 13 April 2004 22:36 (twenty-two years ago)

I don't know what's wrong with you oops, luna's efforts have made me come over all funny/erect.

― ..., Tuesday, 13 April 2004 22:39 (twenty-two years ago)

See? HA.

― luna (luna.c), Tuesday, 13 April 2004 22:42 (twenty-two years ago)

Stop that!

― all funny/erect (ktepi), Tuesday, 13 April 2004 22:43 (twenty-two years ago)

stop what?

― fuck my ass, bitch (luna.c), Tuesday, 13 April 2004 22:44 (twenty-two years ago)

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