Marilyn Haggerty's amazing Olive Garden review and the subsequent viral shitstorm

No one wants to maintain the texture, color, and flavor of Rush Limbaugh.

i blanch kale and collards, and then sautee because they are so fucking tough

i steam chard because it has a more delicate texture and doesn't seem to need blanching

i am *really* into bitter greens though

I love undercooked kale with lemon juice

this is how i do one bunch of chard:

take a small pot and put a bare amount of water at the bottom, like 1/4" or something

put a glass lid on it and heat until the water is just boiling

open it up, throw big handfuls of stemmed and coarsely chopped chard into the pot and put the lid back on

open it back up 2-5 minutes later when the chard has wilted but is still bright green / red / rainbow

throw it in another pot w/ chopped garlic and possibly chopped red onions, add one tbs olive oil and sautee very quickly on high heat just until the garlic is golden and the onions are sweating

take off heat, add a dash of vinegar or lemon, sprinkle on coarse sea salt, and eat

yum

the only difference when i do kale is that i blanch it in salted boiling water for 3-5 minutes and usually skip the salt at the end, add fresh ground pepper instead

sometimes maybe i mix the vinegar or lemon w/ a small amount of mustard

man you just boil the fuck out of some ham hocks and you throw some greens in there and simmer half a day and then you sprinkle a little vinegar on those shits

chard with currants and pinenuts is also really good

yeah austerity's on the money with hamhocks. yuuuuum.

with kale I tend to braise it. sautee onions and red pepper flakes in a decent amount of olive oil, add kale and sautee a bit more, and then cover with 4-5 cups of water, bring to the boil and then simmer for about 20-30 mins. it's really good.

"austerity's on the money with hamhocks" is a weird phrase

can't get hamhocks around here, hence I have to resort to bacon fat

i just usually make it as a side so i want to cook it in like 10 minutes while the meat and carbs cool down

xpost that's a REALLY tasty way to make collard greens if you don't have a job or anything to do on saturday

just like this but w/ a ham hock

VG, I do something like that with a little garlic and diced tomato and I use chicken broth instead of water. v tasty & simple (xposts)

hi-five

tomato sounds awesome, I will try that

man you just boil the fuck out of some ham hocks and you throw some greens in there and simmer half a day and then you sprinkle a little vinegar on those shits

http://28.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_kw9h1uBZot1qa1t4co1_400.jpg

^ carl weathers otm

#konycollards

Is there not an I Love Cooking for you perverts?

I am stealing yr Kale recipe.

http://www.closetcooking.com/2012/02/swiss-chard-pesto.html

Stevie D said that he hates cilantro except in cilantro pesto, which is contrary to what one would expect!

My favourite pesto is a chargrilled aubergine one, and there's also a roasted red pepper one with almonds which I love

Probably going to make a cilantro pesto here this weekend; need to do something with a slew of things in the fridge before New York next week. Which reminds me...

with the boiled egg incident, the egg actually boiled fine, but when i was trying to peel it, it wouldn't peel, and i somehow ripped the egg in half and the whole thing fell in the bin

I just want to say that this happened to me this morning almost exactly, except I had hard cooked two eggs and one was fine so I still had an egg for my lunch, and the one that I muffed up wasn't my last egg, but I definitely thought of lex and I had some pretty hearty LOLs in the kitchen.

And yes, I ran them both under cold water and did all the right things. One was just a real jerk of an egg.

just hit me yesterday that on mh's whirlwind ny tour they made sure to get a shot of her eating a dirty water dog, but I don't think she ever got to gray's papaya? that's a shame.

she apparently died 10 feet from its entrance... crawled the last three blocks but just didn't quite make it

cold

sad end

LOL I don't know what happened in this thread but IMO small town newspapers are a national treasure. I can get pretty immersed in local news if its myopic and small enough -- "big city" news doesn't do it for me. "yeah yeah someone got stabbed on the bus... wait hold on... The courthouse renovations are dangerously overbudget?!"

she reviewed shake shack and le bernardin:

http://www.grandforksherald.com/event/article/id/232570/

i love that she's switched up absolutely nothing about her writing style despite the knowledge of her suddenly increased audience

her use of the passive voice is really pitch-perferct

Usually when I visit restaurants, there is no effort to show off the kitchen.

:-)

i think the "minnesota nice" phenomenon would drive me insane if i had to move to the midwest. i'd just be like "PLEEEASE just get down to brass tacks and tell me to fuck off already."

i mean, i'm from two very rude coastal cities; i expect the worst, always.

this woman is seriously my favorite person writing about restaurants ever

We took a menu handed out on the sidewalk and stood in line about 20 minutes before we could even get inside. We enjoyed the experience. And actually the burgers were very tasty. They had the good flavor that comes only with a little fat. We are not sure if they contained pink slime that has hit the news waves of late. And we didn’t ask.

love this

i love that she's switched up absolutely nothing about her writing style despite the knowledge of her suddenly increased audience

She could have filed it before OliveGardengate.

"actually"

exactly!

I think she went to NYC specifically because of the OG review.

Why else would Anthony Bourdain have gotten involved?

When, at length, we finished this long, leisurely meal, we talked of walking back to our hotel. Then, we thought twice about it and decided we wanted to ride.

"We were hammered after the flurry of wine pairings."

i feel like being asked if you prefer marilyn haggerty's writing to that of pitchfork reviews reviews should be some kind of litmus test

This story just keeps on giving. Amazing to think it started out as a lame "lol Midwest" internet meme.

i don't want to give too much credit to marilyn hagerty, but it'd be interesting to see attitudinal/contrarian freshman creative-writing students do her kind of writing as an exercise, to see how much restraint they're capable of.

I tried that sausage and parsnip recipe and Ferngarden-Whelkstall is totally fronting about the length of time required to bake a dozen sausages.

"We are not sure if they contained pink slime that has hit the news waves of late."

What does this even mean?

"Pink Slime Terrorizing the Eastern Seaboard" iirc

i think the "minnesota nice" phenomenon would drive me insane if i had to move to the midwest. i'd just be like "PLEEEASE just get down to brass tacks and tell me to fuck off already."

― the kids of boris midney high (get bent), Thursday, March 22, 2012 1:35 PM (6 hours ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

fuck off :)