2012 republican presidential nominee III: can romney get santorum out of his hair?

I added the middle part--the rest is verbatim.

you could count on having a secure future, a prosperous life, and a good job doing tax arbitrage as capital gains.

He looks right when he makes the Costanza joke--I'm trying to figure out if he thought Santorum or Paul was the big Seinfeld fan.

Sorry--nothing makes me happier than these Mitt-tries-to-make-sense-of-other-people photos.

http://cdn.theatlantic.com/static/mt/assets/politics/gopdebateaz.banner.jpg

"I know now why you cry, but it is something I can never do."

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VZbA5RM97DI

if he actually said "i love lamp" i would get US citizenship just to vote for him.

that and to become a contestant on Survivor.

There's something lacking there that has nothing to do with policy or opinion. I could hear Obama say those exact same words and get away with it. The president has this way sometimes of stepping briefly out of his role and acting like an ordinary guy, off-topic. "No, seriously. Listen - Detrot's got trees. I love it all." Clinton could do it. Bush Jr could do it too, whenever he's chance himself to stray from the speech for a moment.

Bush Sr, Dole, Gore, Kerry… not so much. These are huge challops, I know, but it's more proof offered that Romney's uncanny valley is just icing on the cake to his flip/flops and being a pirate of Wall Street.

Naw I don't think thats challops I think that's an a good observation. A top-notch politician has the ability to change from politico-register to "just givin' a speech here guys"-register, and know when its appropriate and will work to the crowd. I'm sure Romney could do it, but there's a mental block that's keeping him from knowing how to really do the stump speech... either that or THAT IS Romney, which is pretty scary.

Ditto. When I make fun of Romney, I don't mean to give the impression that Obama doesn't have some of the same issues--he's far from the natural that Clinton was. (One of the first reasons I took to Obama; my own temperament is much closer to Obama than Clinton. I actually feel someone's pain approximately once or twice a year; the rest of the time, I do my best impression.) But he is able to improvise enough to get by--your trees line captures that well. When Romney improvises, he comes up with some of the weirdest elocutions I've ever heard from a politician.

I could hear Obama say those exact same words and get away with it.

Obama HAS said those exact same words

imagine Romney singing "Let's Stay Together"

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FDwwAaVmnf4

I was just watching the "I Love Lamp" clip above. When Romney says, "Not just the Great Lakes, but all the little inland lakes, too," it's almost like he thinks the little inland lakes are a voting demographic and he doesn't want to alienate them.

top comments OTM:

lol @0:20. He totally just checked to see if his wallet was still there.

Interpellation2789 3 weeks ago

Which one's Romney?

IWEEW 4 days ago

he might!

My favorite quote from that speech was about the trees being the right height. So much wtfness. And the tacked-on, "oh, and cars!" at the end too.

It's almost like in Sherlock where he has photoshopped himself a back story of having once lived in Michigan, because he seems so unfamiliar and ill at ease being there.

Gas prices are on the rise, and so like clockwork, politicians are now selling the promise of lower prices at the pump.

Newt Gingrich, struggling to regain momentum in the Republican presidential primary, is leading the way, promising to get prices down to $2.50 per gallon.

"I've developed a program for American energy so no future president will ever bow to a Saudi king again and so every American can look forward to $2.50 a gallon gasoline," Gingrich said during his self-introduction at Wednesday's CNN debate.

. . . "This is absurd," said Paul Bledsoe, a Bipartisan Policy Center scholar who spent more than 20 years working on energy policy in Washington. "Obviously the price of oil is set on a global market. In the immediate term there is almost nothing you can do."

Gingrich's plan for lowering prices revolves around increasing domestic energy production to levels that would make geopolitical concerns an afterthought. The way to do that, according to Gingrich, is by eliminating the EPA, building the Keystone pipeline and allowing more drilling.

http://money.cnn.com/2012/02/24/news/economy/gingrich_gas_prices/

Gingrich cannot do math, quel surprise

Obama was talking about this the other day--something like, "They're dusting out their three-point election year energy plans: Step 1 is drill, Step 2 is drill, Step 3 is drill some more."

really amazing that during the reagan/bush years it was commonly known that the US consumes far more energy than can be supplied domestically, and even earlier than that

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/1973_oil_crisis
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Project_Independence

now ppl are willing to believe in the fantasy that there's enough energy underground in our borders for us to never change anything AND tell OPEC to go fuck itself!

AND keep that oil from being traded on the open market

like, there is no "American" oil market, anything that gets drilled here gets sold to whoever, it doesn't get sold to Americans first and Europeans second or something

right, a billion more cars in asia, no problem!

xp well in a literal sense the oil that is drilled here and canada will likely end up in american gas tanks

I find it utterly unsurprising that the same people dumb enough to believe that lowering tax rates increases revenue will also be dumb enough to believe that restricting the supply of something will lower the price.

well no, they are saying that supply needs to be "unrestricted" via EPA abolishment, more drilling etc. that's not the problem! there isn't enough black goo to make a dent in prices, and everybody knows that.

Probably the only way Newt could get gas down to $2.50 a gallon would be to put the economy into another recession - maybe that's his plan!

well he could inflate the dollar by like 75% or something

the only thing Newt knows how to inflate is his ego

neck sac

baby, neck sac

daddy neck sacs

Romney addressing empty Detroit stadium:
http://img.wpdigital.net/rf/image_296w/2010-2019/WashingtonPost/2012/02/24/National-Politics/Images/139771315.jpg

So many white people in empty Detroit stadium

neck sac

― Little GTFO (contenderizer), Friday, February 24, 2012 3:59 PM Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

baby, neck sac

― A Full Torgo Apparition (Phil D.), Friday, February 24, 2012 4:03 PM Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

daddy neck sacs

― Little GTFO (contenderizer), Friday, February 24, 2012 4:06 PM Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

hahaha!

To go along with Shakey…
http://static.guim.co.uk/sys-images/Guardian/Pix/pictures/2012/2/24/1330121131938/Mitt-Romney-speaks-at-For-007.jpg

Highlighting the smallness of the crowd, his words echoed round the empty stadium seats. He was not helped by the near-silence, winning only an occasional round of applause. At one point, having made a joke about the reluctance of children to leave home, only a handful of people in the audience laughed, an embarrassing response that the empty stadium amplified.

Political opponents quickly waded in. Obama's campaign adviser, David Axelrod, in a tweet, wrote: "Judging from pictures, looks like Mitt pinned himself in inside the 20."

Oh, Lord.

When all else fails, the trees will be there.

http://talkingpointsmemo.com/assets_c/2012/02/romney-cartoon-cropped-proto-custom_28.jpg

(Is that what people mean when they say "tree-huggers"?)

lol, Obama campaign stop at same stadium in 2008:
http://thinkprogress.org/wp-content/uploads/2012/02/ObamaHartfordrally2-081.jpg

xpost -- That image looks like he's about to start going "Trolololololololo"

(That Obama pic was in Connecticut.)

er wait that is not the same stadium. same point in the campaign tho

xpp

"I like the fact that most of the cars I see are Detroit-made automobiles. I drive a Mustang and a Chevy pick-up truck. Ann drives a couple of Cadillacs, actually. And I used to have a Dodge truck, so I used to have all three covered."

this fucking guy. so doomed.

eh got a couple cadillacs lying around here somewhere...

Billy Tree-Hugger: "Hey, Mr. Tree, here comes Governor Mitt!"
Sally Tree-Hugger: "And he's travelling on foot today!"

Obama was talking about this the other day--something like, "They're dusting out their three-point election year energy plans: Step 1 is drill, Step 2 is drill, Step 3 is drill some more."

― clemenza, Friday, February 24, 2012 2:46 PM (3 hours ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

iirc step 2 was "baby"

my helicopter is a Chevy. or a Ford or something.

Ann drives a couple of Cadillacs, actually.

not impressed unless she drives them both at the same time

"when executing her stunts for major hollywood features, my wife ann has one foot in a chevy pickup and the other in a caddy. what a woman."

Annie said when she was just 'bout five years old
You know my husband's gonna be the death of us all
Two TV sets and two Cadillac cars
Well, you know it ain't gonna help me at all