2012 republican presidential nominee III: can romney get santorum out of his hair?

it's true! there was another line, not on SNL, about how rick perry had the "exaggerated good looks of a soap opera villain" that was otm as well

What was the Costanza misquote?

letterman had a classic series of romney zings in 2008

Ha, didn't know Jason Alexander tweeted a response.

iirc he yelled "We're out of Quik!" instead of "We're out of Bosco!"

http://gawker.com/353939/rip-david-lettermans-mitt-romney-looks-like-jokes

William Peter Blatty, ladies and gentlemen:

When every culture in every part of the world from the beginning of history has entertained a belief in the likelihood that there is a Very, Very Bad Guy out there who “destroys the work of the Creator,” my tendency is to believe that where there is quite that much smoke there is probably fire — if you get my drift. To doubt the possibility of such a being out of hand is to regard Christ and/or the evangelists as either maniacs, liars, or very, very, very mistaken. As for Santorum’s outspokenness on the subject, I far prefer a man who has a position and lets us know what it is as opposed to Addison and Steele’s Sir Roger de Coverley whose answer to any difficult question put to him was always, “There is much to be said on both sides.” Yes, there is, but who is to say that Santorum’s side is the one that is incorrect?

"Mitt looks like a former Tarzan"

"he looks like the guy that would approve your check at a supermarket"

"Mitt Romney looks like the American president in a Canadian movie."

is pretty accurate

Yes, there is, but who is to say that Santorum’s side is the one that is incorrect?

*Raises hand*

Cathololics

When every culture in every part of the world from the beginning of history has entertained a belief in the likelihood that there is a Very, Very Bad Guy out there who “destroys the work of the Creator

Where did you get your comparative religion degree, a Bazooka chewing gum wrapper?

yeah that's sort of startling in its wrongness. Conceptualization of satan was a fairly unusual theological development

“destroys the work of the Creator

Here is the root of this problem. The Very Bad Guy is the Creator himself, you imbecile. And if you think Very Bad Guy is something outside of your Creator then your Creator sort of has limits and isn't exactly all-powerful now, is he?

Satan's not even present in early Judaism not to mention a zillion other religions

He wrote The Exorcist guys. I'm sure he knows exactly what he's talking about.

"when every religion that is the two i am familiar with believes in satan that probably means something rite?"

To doubt the possibility of such a being out of hand is to regard Christ and/or the evangelists as either maniacs, liars, or very, very, very mistaken.

welp

Needed to be a second 'and/or' in that sentence.

'mitt looks like the guy who winks when he shakes yr hand'

To doubt the possibility of such a being out of hand is to regard Christ and/or the evangelists as either maniacs, liars, or very, very, very mistaken.

sounds familiar

“Logic!” said the Professor half to himself. “Why don’t they teach logic at these schools? There are only three possibilities. Either your sister is telling lies, or she is mad, or she is telling the truth. You know she doesn’t tell lies and it is obvious that she is not mad. For the moment then and unless any further evidence turns up, we must assume that she is telling the truth.”

Lord, liar or lunatic wasn't a convincing argument when I was 8 and I was a believer.

lol gbx

http://media.salon.com/2012/02/Rick-Santorum-and-Mitt-Romney-460x307.jpg

"You know, that endorsement four years ago wasn't exactly what you'd call heartfelt..."

"Mind if I grab your arm and practice looking loose and spontaneous?"

just think, one crossed wire and Romneybot could have yanked Santorum's arm clean off

Amputation by sudden snatching.

i didn't watch last night's debate, but i have one silly question -- did either of the "devout" Catholics Santorum or Gingrich have Ash Wednesday schmutz on their foreheads?

Sans-torn-arm

Romney's left himself completely undefended against the imminent Santorum eye gouge.

i can live with someone believing in Satan. i suspect that Santorum and his supporters think that Satan looks and acts like the demon on a can of Underwood Deviled Ham.

no ash on head last nite

i think you guys are missing the point a little (along with wm p blatty). it's not that santorum believes that satan exists, it's that he believes satan's big plan on earth is to attack and subvert america, by means of controlling, in order: 1. american universities, 2. america's protestant churches, 3. popular culture & the arts, 4. politics & government

he's saying that satan has already done these things.

He must have a hard time sleeping.

it certainly explains why he keeps putting his family through his political career

that kind of clarity of vision usually means a frighteningly untroubled interior life i'm afriad

But if Satan's taken over everything surely he's all "Can't sleep, Satan'll get me."

have at it, photoshoppers:

http://ecx.images-amazon.com/images/I/41E4DT12ZXL._SL500_AA300_.jpg

This was good: http://www.americantimes.org/blog/2012/02/21/america-is-one-hell-of-a-country-according-to-rick-santorum/

So I won’t talk about the culture wars. I’m more interested in the right’s incoherence than in its issue-arsenal at the moment.

What I don’t understand – what just baffles me endlessly – are these dueling notions of America as the greatest, most super-fantastic nation on Earth and America as an immoral, decayed society under assault from all sides. We are God’s people but we’re also so vulnerable to Satan himself that we need a super-hero, super-holy president like Rick Santorum to save us.

The cult of American exceptionalism is, perhaps unsurprisingly, comprised by the same people who make up the cult of American decline. There’s an insecurity about it that I think shines a little light onto the conservative movement and the Republican Party. The pretense of toughness; the rah-rah-rah nationalism; the sense of victimization, of being endlessly put-upon. These are all forms within the language of American conservatism, or at least mainstream movement conservatism, that give shape to the broader dialogue on the right.

I find the strange sort of ambivalence among Christians w/r/t to Satan to be really fascinating (part of why I like Blatty's movies, maybe).

errr "w/r/t to" sry for that

Many xposts ago:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vQWLQ1jWsDs

"As George Costanza would say, when they're applauding, stop." So he's not all that far off--better than if he'd said, "when they're applauding, terminate operations immediately"--but it does have that Romney clunkiness we've all come to love.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iGX_7lMcEYI

My dream: "As Kramer would say, I'm out of the contest!"

There was a time in this country when if you worked hard, and went to school, and if you learned the values of America in your home, and your dad was president of a big auto company, and then became governor of a thriving industrial state, that you could count on having a secure future and a prosperous life. That was an American promise, and it’s been broken by this president.

(Paraphrase)

i can't tell... did he say that or is that a joke?

I added the middle part--the rest is verbatim.

you could count on having a secure future, a prosperous life, and a good job doing tax arbitrage as capital gains.

He looks right when he makes the Costanza joke--I'm trying to figure out if he thought Santorum or Paul was the big Seinfeld fan.

Sorry--nothing makes me happier than these Mitt-tries-to-make-sense-of-other-people photos.

http://cdn.theatlantic.com/static/mt/assets/politics/gopdebateaz.banner.jpg

"I know now why you cry, but it is something I can never do."