Movies That Were Probably Made By a Spasm of Six Year-Olds on Acid: The Top 75 Action Films Poll Results Thread

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first blood is legend. i should have voted for deliverance. and southern comfort.

scott seward, Friday, 17 February 2012 02:19 (fourteen years ago)

I really like First Blood.

Also a multitude of xxxposts to Josh In Chicago, re Conan: oh Conan's important. I don't remember seeing ET punch a camel. Any severed heads in ET? NO. I REST MY CASE.

Janet Snakehole (VegemiteGrrl), Friday, 17 February 2012 02:24 (fourteen years ago)

Conan peaks with the camel punch. The rest is bad snake FX, iirc.

Josh in Chicago, Friday, 17 February 2012 02:38 (fourteen years ago)

rong

Janet Snakehole (VegemiteGrrl), Friday, 17 February 2012 02:58 (fourteen years ago)

i keep missing the end of omar's daily countdowns cos they end at 3-4am local time and opening up this thread every morning when i get to work is always a pleasure. except for the part where time & tide doesn't show up. and while it is an awesome movie i feel like it's not getting into the top 25 ;_;

Jibe, Friday, 17 February 2012 03:09 (fourteen years ago)

i am v tempted to start watching these from the first i have not seen to the last

desperado, rough rider (thomp), Friday, 17 February 2012 03:23 (fourteen years ago)

i enjoy morbs's 'action is not a genre' stance - in some way that's what makes this list so interesting, i think, way more so than a list of 'best sf movies' or whatever. (the formal definitions proffered upthread are pretty neat, tho -- 'action' a genre like 'lyric poetry' is a genre, not like 'crime' is a genre)

desperado, rough rider (thomp), Friday, 17 February 2012 03:26 (fourteen years ago)

you know this is the most fun big poll i've read by miles and miles. so many great memories shared, so much warm nostalgia, so may lols! i really appreciate the work that Omar has been putting into this.

... just sayin.

piscesx, Friday, 17 February 2012 03:29 (fourteen years ago)

also, hero's not on that list? hero's not gonna place? KFH places and not hero? ;_;

oh dude that would have been on my ballot, sorry for not voting

(thinks and smiles) (DJP), Friday, 17 February 2012 03:31 (fourteen years ago)

I really didn't get on with its Blokey Honor and Honorable Blokes.

Awwwwww! For me, this is one of the necessary components of an action movie.

drawn to them like a moth toward a spanakopita (Laurel), Friday, 17 February 2012 03:34 (fourteen years ago)

I like that we can both love the genre while needing opposite things from it, though.

drawn to them like a moth toward a spanakopita (Laurel), Friday, 17 February 2012 03:34 (fourteen years ago)

Action movies: bringing ppl together since forever

Janet Snakehole (VegemiteGrrl), Friday, 17 February 2012 03:35 (fourteen years ago)

Bronson. Knew I should've voted for Death Wish 3.

I spaced on voting in this poll, which I deeply regret. I may have thrown a vote to DW3 - esp. for the whole extended deluge of gunfire at the end, b/w the sub-Troma 'street toughs' & the fed-up old dudes taking them out w/ gatling guns & bazookas? I mean..

Still, prob would have had to be sparing w/ allotting TOO many votes for OTT 80s camp & I would have chucked DW3 in favor of Road House & Commando if it came down to it.

Jurgis Rudkus // Dick Butkus (Pillbox), Friday, 17 February 2012 03:44 (fourteen years ago)

I certainly hope First Blood places. It's much better than, say, T2, which will definitely place.

I don't know if it would've occurred to me to consider Children Of Men an action film, even though it has probably one of the top ten best action sequences in any movie ever.

SNEEZED GOING DOWN STEPS, PAIN WHEN PUTTING SOCKS ON (Deric W. Haircare), Friday, 17 February 2012 03:44 (fourteen years ago)

I mean Die Hard has got this, right?

Jurgis Rudkus // Dick Butkus (Pillbox), Friday, 17 February 2012 03:45 (fourteen years ago)

Haven't thought about that Walt Simonson Alien comic for years, but it was fantastic.

Pete Scholtes, Friday, 17 February 2012 03:58 (fourteen years ago)

I was not aware of that one, and shall have to acquire it.

btw the Blade Runner adaptation is pretty cool and easy to buy on ebay

valleys of your mind (mh), Friday, 17 February 2012 04:01 (fourteen years ago)

i had this too of course. again, before i saw the movie, i think.

http://img3.etsystatic.com/il_570xN.262027315.jpg

scott seward, Friday, 17 February 2012 04:07 (fourteen years ago)

Seagal better get some love.

And i refuse to believe Hard Target won't make it.

dayove cool (Noodle Vague), Friday, 17 February 2012 06:49 (fourteen years ago)

Watching Commando for the first time on my ipod on the way to work. Don't know how I missed this one as a kid.

getting good with gulags (beachville), Friday, 17 February 2012 11:45 (fourteen years ago)

Matrix: [after killing a man in the plane] Don't disturb my friend, he's dead tired.

Jurgis Rudkus // Dick Butkus (Pillbox), Friday, 17 February 2012 12:01 (fourteen years ago)

t2 is all-time but maybe only ilx top 20

beware of greek bearer bonds (darraghmac), Friday, 17 February 2012 12:06 (fourteen years ago)

http://somewhatmanlynerd.com/gifs/letoffsomesteambennett.gif

etc, Friday, 17 February 2012 12:07 (fourteen years ago)

if ive learned anything from this poll, its that i have to see 'commando' again. its been too long!

Michael B Higgins (Michael B), Friday, 17 February 2012 12:09 (fourteen years ago)

oh, I've totally seen this shopping mall scene before! Love this stewardess girl.

getting good with gulags (beachville), Friday, 17 February 2012 12:10 (fourteen years ago)

steel drums and saxophones. you can't beat this.

getting good with gulags (beachville), Friday, 17 February 2012 12:13 (fourteen years ago)

rae daw chong is absolutely my favorite in this.

getting good with gulags (beachville), Friday, 17 February 2012 12:24 (fourteen years ago)

Matrix: [Comes out from hidden place] Come on Bennett, throw away the chicken shit gun, you don't just want to pull the trigger, you want to put the knife in me, and look me in the eye, and see what's going on in there when you turn it, that's what you want to do, right?

Such a weird fight.

woof, Friday, 17 February 2012 12:28 (fourteen years ago)

with a chicken shit gun, yeah i'd imagine.

ledge, Friday, 17 February 2012 12:29 (fourteen years ago)

Hard Target features Van Damme punching out a rattlesnake. The "best" Van Damme is, of course, Time Cop, though Double Impact had the best tagline ("double the Van Damage!"). However, "Double Team" (Rodman! Rourke!) may be the most batshit insane ridiculous of the bunch, with Van Damme teaming up with Tsui Hark. Hark also directed "Knock Off," which is similarly surreal-nuts, but "Double Team" ... man.

Josh in Chicago, Friday, 17 February 2012 12:43 (fourteen years ago)

how do ppl here feel about 'jcvd'

"spasm of six-year-olds" is a great collective noun

desperado, rough rider (thomp), Friday, 17 February 2012 12:45 (fourteen years ago)

<3 these dudes: http://www.ruthlessreviews.com/1413/commando/

Jurgis Rudkus // Dick Butkus (Pillbox), Friday, 17 February 2012 12:48 (fourteen years ago)

wait, has a JCVD movie made the list yet?

if no JCVD movie does, then... I just don't know.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=s1tAYmMjLdY (dayo), Friday, 17 February 2012 12:50 (fourteen years ago)

chicken shit gun

manure cannon?

White 'Poop' Jesus (snoball), Friday, 17 February 2012 12:53 (fourteen years ago)

xp Street Fighter for #1

White 'Poop' Jesus (snoball), Friday, 17 February 2012 12:54 (fourteen years ago)

how do ppl here feel about 'jcvd'

― desperado, rough rider (thomp), Friday, February 17, 2012 7:45 AM (9 minutes ago) Bookmark

its really good

RudolfHitlerFtw (Hungry4Ass), Friday, 17 February 2012 12:56 (fourteen years ago)

http://img638.imageshack.us/img638/9296/commandoarnieactionfigu.jpg

^ had this when I was a kid!

Jurgis Rudkus // Dick Butkus (Pillbox), Friday, 17 February 2012 13:02 (fourteen years ago)

xp re jcvd: i've only seen that one clip that was making the youtube rounds for a while, it totally sounds like the kind of movie i'd be into but at the same time i've seen like ten minutes of all other van damme movies ever so the idea of watching it makes me feel sort of like a pseud

desperado, rough rider (thomp), Friday, 17 February 2012 13:02 (fourteen years ago)

also, there's the curious fact that Die Hard was originally envisioned as a Commando sequel:

John McTiernan was originally going to make Commando 2, but Arnold Schwarzenegger turned the role offer down. Commando 2 was transformed into this film; Schwarzenegger was the first actor offered the title role, but he again declined. Eventually Bruce Willis would get the part after it had been offered to Sylvester Stallone, Burt Reynolds, Harrison Ford, Mel Gibson and Richard Gere.

Jurgis Rudkus // Dick Butkus (Pillbox), Friday, 17 February 2012 13:06 (fourteen years ago)

Predator and Commando man not making the top 10... I guess I just don't get you guys. Top 5 should be Pred, Commando, T1, T2 and Die Hard.

a hoy hoy, Friday, 17 February 2012 13:12 (fourteen years ago)

the thought of anybody in that list as McLane tells you why Willis is an all-time great tbh

contreatable logorrhea (Noodle Vague), Friday, 17 February 2012 13:14 (fourteen years ago)

xp re jcvd: i've only seen that one clip that was making the youtube rounds for a while, it totally sounds like the kind of movie i'd be into but at the same time i've seen like ten minutes of all other van damme movies ever so the idea of watching it makes me feel sort of like a pseud

― desperado, rough rider (thomp), Friday, February 17, 2012 8:02 AM (11 minutes ago) Bookmark

the more into you van damme the better it probably is, but i think as long as you know who he is you can prob appreciate it

RudolfHitlerFtw (Hungry4Ass), Friday, 17 February 2012 13:14 (fourteen years ago)

Die Hard will win and bollocks to any SF movie being top 5 unless Verhoeven directed it

contreatable logorrhea (Noodle Vague), Friday, 17 February 2012 13:15 (fourteen years ago)

i think gibson probably could've been a good mclane

RudolfHitlerFtw (Hungry4Ass), Friday, 17 February 2012 13:15 (fourteen years ago)

cd've been dece yeah but too close to the Lethal Weapon persona?

contreatable logorrhea (Noodle Vague), Friday, 17 February 2012 13:16 (fourteen years ago)

yeah i was just thinking that.

RudolfHitlerFtw (Hungry4Ass), Friday, 17 February 2012 13:21 (fourteen years ago)

also not bald enough

RudolfHitlerFtw (Hungry4Ass), Friday, 17 February 2012 13:21 (fourteen years ago)

also wd have punched his wife in the face at the end of the film

contreatable logorrhea (Noodle Vague), Friday, 17 February 2012 13:22 (fourteen years ago)

the thought of richard gere as john mcclaine is blowing my mind here

pandemic, Friday, 17 February 2012 13:53 (fourteen years ago)

Recall, the idea of Bruce Willis as John McClaine was nuts at the time, too.

Josh in Chicago, Friday, 17 February 2012 13:57 (fourteen years ago)


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