itt blogs instruct you how to be a man

haha you're a prince, elmo, fwiw

that last one is more "rule of a stalker"

men are supposed to do all the stalking in the relationship, iirc

as long as you're wearing a well tailored suit it's not stalking.

I want to submit terrible things to them along the lines of "Keeping the heads in Ziploc freezer bags helps avoid problems with the stench"

"Always keep a few zipties in your pocket."

"If she's been homeless long enough, odds are no one is looking for her."

"Condoms are for those unfortunate enough not to own a latex bodysuit and butcher's apron"

"Nothing shows you care more than a trip to the Everglades."

"The more you stroke her hair, the more likely she is to stop crying."

"a well-tailored suit is to a woman what lingerie is to a man: something special to wear while masturbating in front of a full-length mirror."

elmo, you're giving me serious "watch out, he's calling from inside the blog" vibes here

"nothing says 'i love you' like tattooing her name across your face"

i mean yeah, as a gay man the heteronormative stuff irks me, as a guy who tries to be a feminist the gender role instruction bothers me too. i have a couple of followers who are trans men and i have to wonder what their experience of MAN BLOGS are like

i dunno, obviously i have a lot of thoughts and feelings about this, some day i am going to write a long boring blog post about it that references judith butler or something instead of rambling on & on itt

I really hate heteronormativity. It's kind of my most hated thing. I think being in relationships where I realize there are these unspoken assumptions as to roles that I just don't buy into really clued me into it

the underlying wounded/entitled male pride in these is the weirdest, i think, cf the penultimate graf of the 'from a guys point of view' piece: "a guy who will love you (i'm so kind), no matter how bad you make them feel (you're so ungrateful)"

isn't that just code for "I will put up with all of your bullshit if you let me hit it"?

tbh, I have lost multiple sweatshirts to girls.

my gf's grad school friend's bf has one of these blogs, I don't think it has been linked and don't want to direct traffic from here2there but it does follow a lot of the themes upthread. he is a small well-groomed academic-y kid, I don't think he means much harm to the world.

that's just the basic lonely nerd approach to relationships tho--"why do women always fall for these clear-skinned, football-watching assholes when she could be watching DS9 reruns with me? i'd be nice to her always. and forever."

one would think "rules of a gentleman" would be etiquette stuff, opening doors etc. this kind of axiomatic approach to more intimate relationships is def creepy. it's enacting two distinct strains of distasteful heteronormativity--first the jockish women-as-acquisition high-fiving strain and then wrapping it up in the above lonely nerd i'm-a-nice-guy strain. then codifying it. and tumblring it or whatever.

uhhhmm i don't know how to say this not-badly, but what does it 'mean' that all the tumblrs linked by this 'therulesofagentleman' person all seem sort of girly to me? idk maybe it's tumblr itself

or maybe i was expecting a lot of very serious theorizing about the nature of women these days, instead of just pretty pictures and inspirational quotes.

"Seeing through her eyes is easier if you freeze them before drilling the holes."

hey there're loads of nice girls out there willing to watch ds9 reruns with nerds, this is clearly not the issue

cheer up boys, there's a Morgan Webb out there for you somewhere

i have to give somebody a "man to man" talk tomorrow at work. maybe i shd print out all the rules of a gentleman stuff as cue cards.

just buy him a tailored suit ffs

I've found that one thing that really puts the kibosh on sexual harassment is the right pocket square

"Seeing through her eyes is easier if you freeze them before drilling the holes."

omfg

the fake profundity of this shit gets to me as much as if not more than the fucked up conservatism re gender/sexuality

i mean the self-serious idiocy makes me want to throw these guys out the window

yeah but the sense of the guy sitting back and looking pleased with himself after each pearl of wisdomg is kinda funny

pearl of wisdomg

ha

hey there're loads of nice girls out there willing to watch ds9 reruns with nerds, this is clearly not the issue

OTM. Or even nerd ladies instigating/encouraging the Star Trek viewing/convention attendance/ST book binging. I am just saying.

hisdom

lol barf

max has been RTing some quality posts from @MensHumor that feel pertinent ttt

i think it's fair to say some of these 'gentleman' rules are submitted by girls, tho -- princesses in search of their prince charming or whatever -- which complicates things. sometimes i'll get a reblog with the comment "my future husband will dress like this :) :)" and the tumblr bio is "i love preppy stuff and dogs and jesus" and i'll be honest, it kinda freaks me out

prepster puppies 4 jesus

"Seeing through her eyes is easier if you freeze them before drilling the holes."

― I spend a lot of time thinking about apricots (DJP), Wednesday, January 25, 2012 11:18 AM (34 minutes ago) Bookmark Suggest Ban Permalink

lost my shit @ this btw

should be on a t-shirt or something

"Ladies cannot resist a man in a suit or a chloroform-soaked rag."

why are people with popular style blogs so bad at style??
― # (Lamp), Wednesday, January 25, 2012 12:06 AM (18 hours ago)

further evidence: the dude from a continuous lean

http://27.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_lyd9f5prTG1qbh8wwo1_500.jpg

MY LOOK IS
BASED ON
LOOKING LIKE
A FUSSY VERSION
OF A NORMAL
DUDE

"LOOKS COOL"

lol "LOOKS COOL" is really my only criterion for anything i put on myself so it's not really what i want to hear from someone whose ostensible job it is to blog/write about these things

OUTFIT CAREFULLY DESIGNED TO HIGHLIGHT MY LACK OF NECK

BOUGHT A BUNCH OF NICE LOOKING SHIT AND JUST PUT IT ALL ON AT THE SAME TIME

Dude not uncuet otherwise although I feel like those are the shoes of a tool.

also, people who should know better, misusing their color terms! i know this is a nitpicky peeve of mine but if you are a fashion professional you prob shouldn't be saying 'hue' when you mean 'value' imho

COLLAR ---> POPPED