WHO THE FUCK READS THE DAILY EXPRESS?

http://www.bfi.org.uk/sightandsound/images/issue/420/80s-alt-comedy_420.jpg

NedTRifle why do you read Daily Express??

I'm stupid.

Daily Express investigation today

the idea of the express actually investigating anything at all is ludicrous

that said, its kind of surprising to see with what is almost actual fire in its belly. it has long seemed strangely detached, as though it doesn't believe what it espouses. this is because it doesn't really say anything, its never an opinion leader in the way, say, the mail is. far more than any other paper the express is for people who aren't very bright

Of course they haven't investigated really this - they've just reported whatever shit the Police federation have fed them. This is part of their (PF's) campaign to get more money.

Of course they haven't investigated really this
Of course they haven't really investigated this.

I know, its just somehow funnier when the express pretends its investigated something

Old people.

is the express where mail readers go to die?

my grandparents read the express, i wish they didn't :(

I keep noticing the headlines of this paper, it seems ...worse than the others? Worse as in more hysterical, more into making its readers afraid that (they) are taking their liberties etc away. Worse as in stupider, also. EUROCRATS TO CONTROL BRITAIN'S BORDERS. IMMIGRANT BABY BOOM COSTS 1BN. OUTCRY AS POLICE LETS OFF 4,256 CRIMINALS. These three from last week (I just looked at their website) I guess they either make this stuff up, or if you found the actual story the headline was based upon, it would bear little resemblance to what was on the Express' front page? It's pretty sad.

The best bit are the "Cancer Cured by Eating 15000 Organic Apricot Seeds A Day" front pages that crop up all the time.

Football fever after the England team qualified for the World Cup finals in South Africa will give the economy a multi-billion pound boost.

The feel-good factor that began with the final whistle sounding on the team’s 5-1 thrashing of Croatia on Wednesday
night is set to continue through to the finals next June.

As well as numbers of Englishmen descending on South Africa on a scale not witnessed since the Boer War, according to one official, millions more at home will forget the recession and enjoy the World Cup party to the full.

Even toilet seats bearing the St George cross could be snapped up.

millions more at home will forget the recession

I think this has already happened.

Pash I think part of that is that the Express is owned by an absolute raving nutter. Anyone know if he's still wanted by the New York mafia?

You'd hope that the recession would be over by the World Cup, but hey.

http://images.dailyexpress.co.uk/img/covers/257x330front/2009-12-15.jpg

http://www.dailyexpress.co.uk/posts/view/146138

Based on a report by the European Foundation, otherwise known as Tory MP Bill "Stash The" Cash and John Laughland, best mate of Slobodan Milosevic.

Every single one of those reasons is just plain wacky.

89) It is a myth that CO2 is a pollutant, because nitrogen forms 80% of our atmosphere and human beings could not live in 100% nitrogen either: CO2 is no more a pollutant than nitrogen is and CO2 is essential to life.

Okay, so 80% CO2 wouldn't be a problem?

Describing that as "wacky" is being kind, very kind

Based on a report by the European Foundation, otherwise known as Tory MP Bill "Stash The" Cash and John Laughland, best mate of Slobodan Milosevic.

Thatcher is the Patron of this mob too, but I thought she was an early champion of the emerging climate change consensus, cos it was a handy tool for beating the miners down with. Maybe just a flag of convenience back then though.

And then there's Nigel Lawson

Based on a report by the European Foundation

and in turn the european foundation's "report" (in truth, not much more than an extended blog post) was based on info from "friends of science", a canadian outfit which says its funds are "not exclusively from the oil and gas industry".

New Scientist debunks every single one of the first 50 reasons.

Kinda surprised they bothered because I can't imagine there would be too many Express readers who would look at that, but good for them anyhow.

looooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooool

55) The argument that climate change is a of result of global warming caused by human activity is the argument of flat Earthers.

i am trying to imagine the conversation which took place in the daily express office as this list was compiled...'what can we get on these woolly bastards?'

Haha, hadn't seen that one, is that for real?

click on the link to win!

I'm surprised the Daily Express doesn't say "black people are responsible, because their skin reflects less sunlight back into space"

coming over here, warming our country up

^ sadly that is a pretty accurate summary of the BNP position on this:

"Every person we take from the third world with a tiny climate footprint and bring them (sic) into the western world, we're massively increasing their impact of carbon release into the world's atmosphere. There's no doubt about it, the western way of life is not sustainable. So what on Earth is the point of turning more people into westerners."

no, the point he's making there is that we should all go and live in the manner of the least pollutive tribes ofafrica iirc

lolwut

http://news.sky.com/sky-news/content/StaticFile/jpg/2010/Feb/Week4/15557404.jpg

lolwut

Maybe because of the photos our newspapers use to illustrate stories about migrants?

Wasn't it yesterday they did the 'living in luxury' story?

MANSIONS FOR SCROUNGERS

21.02.10, 3:54pm

They should only get the money for 2 children, be sterilised and made to work. No further monies will be paid to them and a basic home would be plenty for them. They brought these kids into the world now let them look after them without expecting this society to keep on giving these parasites more monies/luxury living. It's time they were held to count. There are plenty of camp sites they could go and live on tents are cheaper than houses.

• Posted by: Chipsnest • Report Comment

Tents in 'cheaper than houses' shocker

right wing in wanting to put people they don't like in horrible ghettos shocker.

Not on form today:

http://news.sky.com/sky-news/content/StaticFile/jpg/2010/Feb/Week4/15558153.jpg

please just post this every day for lols.

Best thing about their website is this

http://cdn.images.dailyexpress.co.uk/img/comments/nocomments.gif

at the bottom of every story.

"Dictator's war threat to Queen over Falklands"

Did they threaten to play a reunion gig at Buckingham Palace unless oil drilling stops?

thttp://whythatsdelightful.wordpress.com/2009/03/18/the-express-wins-the-race-to-the-bottom/

http://whythatsdelightful.wordpress.com/2009/03/18/the-express-wins-the-race-to-the-bottom/

Yawn, not even trying, 0/10:

http://news.sky.com/sky-news/content/StaticFile/jpg/2010/Feb/Week4/15558957.jpg

It does have some fantastic comments, though: http://www.dailyexpress.co.uk/comments/viewall/160311

lol ashley. of course it would be the mother in law who made you act like a cheating prick.

<3 that dude forever, never change.

Is that good or bad?

Also, Odeon in the UK (and elsewhere? IDK) have changed their mind about boycotting this.

This? You mean the Alice in Wonderland film?

met office, who are these charlatans?

So according to the Mail: you can be a 'benefit skiver' even if you're employed in a low income job, and an increase in something that isn't as large as the most pessimistic prediction is somehow evidence of that something 'slowing down'.

It was the same in the Sunday Times this weekend. "Strivers vs Skivers" and "This Is The Year We Crack Welfare".

"Skivers" seems to be based on receiving more in benefits than you give in tax.

There's a legit question to be asked about whether the government should effectively be subsidising employers that refuse to pay living wages but zero talk about increasing the minimum wage at the moment. What are the "skivers" in full-time work meant to do about it?

Or indeed (by that formulation) "skiving" pensioners?

You mean "scrounging" pensioners?

I believe "mewling cash leaches" is the correct term.

silver scroungers

Sadly the it would be against the Express' commercial interests to point out that the majority of social security spending goes to pensioners a.k.a. mewling cash leeches, silver scroungers etc.

Surprise Surprise... Global warming has stalled, admits Met Office

MCforUKIP
12:00pm on Wednesday, 9th January 2013
Report This Comment

It never existed in the first place. Most of the people of this country knew that but our government and Brussels wanted more cash so invented it. It's called taxing the air that we breath.

UKIP are the party to vote for, as they do not believe this myth.

THE COMMON SENSE PARTY>

SUPPORT UKIP

(xp) ditto Tory Party... and all the other parties too

the point being, I suppose, that pensioners actually bother to vote.

Next up, the Cold War never existed...

I know most hacks are just following orders wrt the poor-bashing but i wonder how much of an influence this has:

Journalists and broadcasters born in 1958 typically grew up in families where income was only 5.5% above average, against 42.4% above average for those born in 1970. That is the most dramatic example of a pattern evident across nearly all professions

(from The Guardian on Tuesday)

holy fuck

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also ten times better more racist and xenophobic than the Daily Mail!

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automatically assumed this was a story on policing methods at demonstrations when i first saw it

STOLEN PLANES COULD BE USED FOR 9/11 STYLE TERROR ATTACKS

well, duh.

Read that article earlier. Love the implication that kettles and hairdryers are in some way unique to the British Way Of Life.

Nice that Cameron Diaz got the name of her new film into an unrelated situation.

I love a "NOW..." headline.