OK, which one of you is @BARTSIMSON_REAL?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5CUL4-zRy4M

fyi im writing a novel about horse_ebooks where one character "takes it over" and finds himself slowly being turned into a horse_ebook

― max, Tuesday, November 8, 2011 4:58 AM (7 hours ago) Bookmark Suggest Ban Permalink

the climax of the novel is when he becomes 1 with the horse_ebooks energy field and reaches a higher plane of consciousness

― max, Tuesday, November 8, 2011 4:58 AM (7 hours ago) Bookmark

nanowrimo openers

also in re: this, a real person took over horse_ebooks is what I've heard from a couple of people; it's not a "real" ebooks feed any more

― unlistenable in philly (underrated aerosmith bootlegs I have owned), Monday, November 7, 2011 10:52 PM (Yesterday) Bookmark Suggest Ban Permalink

i am frankly baffled at the idea that one could possibly connect horse_ebooks with any sense of "reality" or authenticity

also it is hilarious that there are rumors about a noise-generating SEO-spam twitter intended to help a website sell ebooks about horses

― max, Monday, November 7, 2011 10:54 PM (Yesterday) Bookmark

well the quotes have been more poignant and weird but you can sense some meaning behind them, compare it with guitar_ebooks or any of the other noncompromised e_books I promise you SOMETHING IS GOING ON

I'm glad somebody out there believes me!

can I be the guy who tries to warn everybody but mysteriously slips on a banana peel in the shower and dies before my warnings are heeded

RT

can I be the guy who tries to warn everybody but mysteriously slips on a banana peel in the shower and dies before my warnings are heeded

― ASPIE Rocky (dayo), Tuesday, November 8, 2011 12:05 PM (3 hours ago) Bookmark

he knew too much

http://twitter.com/#!/ChristmasEbook/status/133323979174838272

thebibandit bandit
ONE BIG .RAR, FULL OF DOG PICTURES
7 Nov Favorite Retweet Reply

lol is that a lil b joke

@thebibandit
bandit
Everybody Welcome Our Special Guest: Garfield! [sewer people limp out onto stage] Wow This Cat Love To Eat! [they beg for medicine+supplies]

you know that feeling where you wish you were super rich so that you could pay people to do whatever they want for the rest of their lives, that is how i feel about the bi bandit

i particularly enjoyed the one abt turtles

I object to the furcation of his name to the bi bandit

clearly it's the bib and it

this one lamp

thebibandit bandit
WELCOME… TO MY SUBTERRARIUM LAIR [terrarium falls and shatters as couch cushion fort supporting it gives way] [all my turtles escape] NOoo!!
2 Nov Favorite Retweet Reply

thebibandit bandit
in retrospect, switching to a cavern-based society was good in that it eliminated cyberbullying but bad in that it introduced spiderbullying
1 Nov Favorite Retweet Reply

haha yeah i dont know why but corny wordplay like that just kills me... also really loved the spiderbullying one

it's like a lost deep thoughts

thebibandit bandit
~♥♥♥~ GRANDMA LOVES HER SPECIAL GRANDSON ~♥♥♥~ BUT NEEDS HER PILLS TO LIVE ~♥♥♥~ PLEASE UN-"ROMHACK" THE MEDICINE CABINET ~♥♥♥~
15 Apr Favorite Retweet Reply

the best ones are equal parts jack handey + borges + lovecraft

thebibandit bandit
for 3 years now everyone's old friendster pages have been posting in languages no one speaks on pictures of us in places we've never been
7 Apr Favorite Retweet Reply

like this one is just

thebibandit bandit
.@tacobell lost for 6 days now in floors 70-80 of Taco Tower Value Meal. not even any food in here. just traps. why do you sell this
5 Apr Favorite Retweet Reply

can everyone i follow stop retweeting horse_ebooks because idgi & feel like i'm not missing out on much

this stuff p much still sux

thebibandit bandit
you shut your mouth / how can you say / my yearbook photo can't be anime
9 Feb Favorite Retweet Reply

horse_ebooks even in its current decrepit state is like better than 99% of twitter

the best ones are equal parts jack handey + borges + lovecraft

yeah this otm i always thought these dudes were kinda cribbing a lot their rhythm/structures from mitch hedberg but jack handey is really better/closer i think

@thebibandit bandit
cops chase a man into a TV showing the same episode of cops. bad boys plays, but i cant hear it. my dog is making that powerline sound again

All these dudes have a direct mainline to my central LOLing system

I am DYING at the yearbook anime one

lol is that a lil b joke

KREAYSHAWN - GUCCI GUCCI

^memesource imo

thebibandit bandit
.@tacobell lost for 6 days now in floors 70-80 of Taco Tower Value Meal. not even any food in here. just traps. why do you sell this
5 Apr Favorite Retweet Reply

thebibandit bandit
for 3 years now everyone's old friendster pages have been posting in languages no one speaks on pictures of us in places we've never been
7 Apr Favorite Retweet Reply

― max, Wednesday, November 9, 2011 2:59 AM (3 hours ago) Bookmark

hahaha holy shit

thebibandit makes me feel so unfunny :(

I am DYING at the yearbook anime one

― 2191: celebrate the m bisontennial (m bison), Wednesday, November 9, 2011 3:58 AM (4 hours ago) Bookmark Suggest Ban Permalink

@dril
wint
@Battlefield user "Garth_Turds" jusr read my address online , except replacing the name of my town with "Toilet". my daughters are crying
12 Nov via web Favorite Retweet Reply

dril wint
Teens respond to scorpions. Im bridging the teen reality with ours, through Scorpion Use. Do scorpions need to act rude to be cool? No
11 Nov Favorite Retweet Reply

Lol

my fav twitters are bibandit & riffraff

RAP GAME LARRY BiRD .... YA MAMA iS A HAiRY NERD

ok the bibandit is incredible

http://img822.imageshack.us/img822/2020/bartsimson.png

we used to call a kid in middle school the b.o. bandit. thats all i can think of wheni see thebibandit.

feeling stepdad_earth today:

stepdad_earth chill bro baggins
THIS YEARS HOT T'GIVING ACTIVITY: YOUR GRANDMA READING A PRINTOUT OF UR TWEETS & ASKING 'NOW WHAT WAS THE POINT OF THIS ONE' AFTER EACH ONE
15 Nov Favorite Retweet Reply

stepdad_earth chill bro baggins
'A Wicked Clown Doesnt Cite Sources,' Said Violent J Professor Of Juggalo Studies Alan Dershowitz As He Peed In My Pumpin Spice Latte
16 hours ago Favorite Retweet Reply

this guy is my new favorite

http://www.twitter.com/DinkMagic

Wayne Gretzky @DinkMagic Close
Embrace the spirit of Libertarionism: A majestic Bald Eagle gets shot with a pistol and eaten raw by a mother and son who later puke it up

Wayne Gretzky @DinkMagic Close
Hey fellow #skeptic s! Come join Skeptic Circle! It was going to be called Unpleasant Cunt Gathering of Shit Asses but that was too long

Wayne Gretzky @DinkMagic 28 Dec Reply Retweet Favorite · Open
guy bring Me a book say Ronthis here a story about a Coony feller wit them big lips who-i say stop! ill publish, but only if i dont get paid

theres a series around december 8 where hes just tweeting @menshumor that kills me

the sex scene tweets on Dec 13 are incredible

btw i mentioned on one of the twitter threads that i started following this weird group of people and i couldnt figure out wtf their deal was, anyway turns out theyre something awful posters

― ice cr?m, Tuesday, 6 September 2011 01:05 (3 months ago) Bookmark Suggest Ban Permalink

is this basically everyone being talked about itt? like this seems enough of a thing that it's a subgenre of Twitter users or whatever, but if it's essentially a SA circlejerk then maybe not (even though I really like it)

a handful of them are goons but a bunch have "joined" on twitter

I think it's all just a SA circle jerk about 1.) corporate branding 2.) space aliens 3.) everything else