Just when you thought it was safe - OK CUPID PART 3: The Return of the WOO!

Anyhow, my JDate experience was uniformly positive, though I only went out with three dudes. One was a perfectly fine fellow, but no chemistry; one I went out with a couple of times and is totally awesome, but did not continue because of guy number three, who I am head over heels for despite the goy thing :)

> "is it OK for me to be on JDate?" thing, but figured that it wasn't my goddamn fault I was born to a non-Jewish mother, y'know?

Your religious faith is determined by what you believe, not what you mother believed

OK Q, you've suggested JDate before, but this time you have been thorough in your exposition. I can even claim a Jewish mother although no faith of any kind. I will report back *opens new tab*

Is J-date free? If so, I am totally signing up. I went to the steampunk haunted house last year; it was completely lame. Someone on okc invited me to see Jonathan Richman, which I thought was totally sweet, but I had plans already. Local Garda, I get a fair number of messages, but it's not like I'm inundated with likely prospects...I dunno though...maybe younger women or more photogenic women have a different experience. Stevie, purely recreational sex seems to me a bit like going to the gym, something I'd rather do alone. Unless the guy happened to be super talented or intuitive, but when does that ever happen? Meanwhile, fate has sent me my perfect man (looks wise and preppiness wise) in the form of a part time subordinate who is 16 years younger than me). This kid looks like a thinner version of the guy Molly Ringwald ends up with in 16 Candles.

It's free for the basic browsing by the looks of things but pay for... reading your inbox? Hmmm.

i'm not convinced for-pay dating sites are any better than free ones.

xp
wow.
My 'godmother'/auntie, who i kinda grew up with, is Jewish on her mother's side - does that count?... I know it does not...

I have yet to be convinced of anything!

In JDate's religion section, besides a list of religious persuasions they offer 'culturally Jewish' or 'Not prepared to convert'. The former isn't accurate despite my Jewish mother (who isn't culturally Jewish either), and the latter seems downright aggressive! It's a compulsory question... I need an 'officially Jewish, but otherwise, not Jewish' option.

First dude I looked has this: '(PS - I'm 1/4 Jewish, on my mother's side, but non practicing).' Feel validated.

Do they have a "Catholicism and laughing about it" option?

Lol, would instantly respond to such a profile on JDate

I thnk "officially jewish" is covered by "culturally jewish" innit? Kind of.

Haha, maybe I should start dating women? I couldn't have any *worse* luck. What is the correct response to "Would you be up to talking on the phone?" besides "Oh god no, why the hell would we want to do that?"

lol

LOL the guy im seeing now who i met on OKC told me in strict terms I was NOT to call him when he gave me his #, before we met. I wasnt bothered, I hate talking on the phone too.

(I think 'culturally Jewish' iis short-hand for you are a New Yorker, of any religious persuasion. Or, you like the films of Woody Allen, or something.

"some of my best friends are jewish"

I know the diff btwn a schlemiel and a schlemazel

Me too!

I sometimes say 'schlep'

I think 'culturally Jewish' iis short-hand for you are a New Yorker, of any religious persuasion

Isn't that what Lenny Bruce said?

Meanwhile, I have a flood of interest on OKC from Minnesotans.

The polyamorist who is my 99% match does list his status as single. This is the type of person I am most suited to?

My 99% match is in B'more 45 mins away but the thought of going to B'more for a date is kind of offputting, I normally schedule them in a bar 2 minutes from my apartment.

I would totally go for Minnesotans. Should I invite long-distance penpals into my life?

Baltimore is so fun. And he might come to you, anyway.

I kind of said I'd go to him, and now I'm busy and tired... we didn't set anything up yet. I do like B'more.

I would date Lenny Bruce.

My sister told me, when I told her that someone offered to come to Qns, but I suggested we meet in Manhattan (halfway point) that I should have had him come to Qns because "men like a challenge." how are we even related?

Dating a heroin addict might be a drag.

At least they wouldn't expect that much from you...maybe money occasionally?

my entire adventure from looking at this thread tonight:
- stalking laurel's profile
- really wondering about this jdate thing. I have a few random jewish friends now and I'm kind of down with this idea. Do they lend me credibility?

I normally schedule them in a bar 2 minutes from my apartment.

this is also my style. /lazy

almost everyone assumes i am jewish because i have dark curly hair and a last name that is sometimes jewish and i am good at math. maybe i should try to pass on jdate?

One drawback--There are less people on jdate, so if you don't quickly meet your dream person, you may end up thinking why am I paying money for such a limited pool

told me in strict terms I was NOT to call him when he gave me his #, before we met.

lol VP, stevie, morbs, and I just had this conversation. NEVER PHONE. In case of emergency, send txt.

My sister told me, when I told her that someone offered to come to Qns, but I suggested we meet in Manhattan (halfway point) that I should have had him come to Qns because "men like a challenge."

You know, I wonder. It seems like the mindset of a person who would say this is kind of reprehensible but it at least has the advantage of prioritizing what the other person can do for YOU, how they can improve YOUR life, instead of the other way around.

OK, I told this dude I don't like to talk on the phone, but that I am a great texter. He responded that he uses phone chat as a screening device but that I already passed. Yay?

Oh I hate talking on the phone. I've had quite a few folks message me w/their phone number (not the 1st message, but as we start to plan), and I always wonder, am I supposed to call you? I usually just message them back with my own # but then I start to wonder if the person finds this passive aggressive. Or maybe I'm just paranoid??

Someone once told me on match.com that she was tired of first dates with guys that she determined at the first date were clearly not right for her, therefore she wanted to talk on the phone first as a screening device.

But, I bet you could have a good conversation with someone, and then meet, and not be interested in them anyway. My way: if someone is at all appealing, meet them as soon as possible.

I'm fine with exchanging numbers as a way of getting in touch (by text) if someone's going to be late. But, one dude, who I met on a Wednesday, texted me that Friday night to ask if I would be free to talk on the phone later that evening. First of all, no, and second of all, just call and leave a message,'don't ask.

I bet you could have a good conversation with someone, and then meet, and not be interested in them anyway.

idk ime long involved convos over the phone are a harbinger of the ability to have them in person which is at least enough to propel a date into "let's be homies" territory.

this time last year there was a girl i traded numbers with, and we spent hours on the phone for a couple of weeks before either of us had the time to meet. by the time we did it already felt like we knew each other.

I don't know, that sounds like I might accidentally make a friend, and frankly I'm trying to limit my exposure to new people unless I might want them to be my boyfriend.

NB: I am...partly...kidding.

Haha. Some people like me, i.e., AWKWARD, have phone fear, plus I have difficulty hearing what people are saying with the coverage that sort of half-covers my apartment. This last part might just be an excuse.

this is too much work!

Here's the problem with phone conversations: it's not clear whether or not there is alcohol involved.

Here's the non problem with meeting in person--almost always guaranteed to be alcohol involved.

Also cuts the amount of possible awkward encounters in half. Plus, I'm so "nice" that even if they sounded horrible on the phone I'd have a hard time saying no to a meet-up.

Laurel, I am completely on board with you not wanting new friends.

Not really into new friends... I have a lot of insanely awesomely radical friends, don't need any more of those.
Also really getting over the potential casual sex hookup option, too. Again, I have a couple of those already, don't need another one.

Le sigh.

i hate talking on the phone, and i hate the idea of someone talking with me on the phone to "screen" me so much!

I'm totally into new friends, but not if they're interested in me and it's not reciprocal, or vice versa. Also, I'm so busy going on all these damn dates lately that I don't have time for new friends.

I'm not worried too much about being screened--I imagine I give good phone--but I would rather skip that step. Let's just meet in person and discern that it's not going to be a thing already.

I imagine I give good phone

do you give good french?