which characteristic you really can't stand in other people?

seriously, the south - see, i grew up in Nashville so i kind of love that. the friendly from the start thing. i mean i know when it's a load of crap too.

aaah, right - see the forced thing is different from the south thing. that's not always forced. some ppl genuinely enjoy being that friendly with you. i love watching ppl's reactions who aren't used to it, they have this deadpan discomfort look that is priceless.

I plan on living on Mount Grouchy someday.

my lodge has QUADRUPLED in value in the 5 years i've lived there

I suspect people from the north might not be able to easily tell the difference from the forced and the genuine. At least in the beginning.

Well, OTOH I like when people are all "say hello to friends you know and everyone you meet," but when a banker or telemarketer or teacher, authority, etc., is calling you by a short version of your first name off the bat, that's scary.

I think the worst was a waitress at Chili's who actually SAT DOWN NEXT TO ME in my booth to show me the drink menu. "But I'll have to card you, you look so young!" Uh, I was 22, why are you acting like you are flirting with an old man? And keep your distance!

Re: the corporate friendliness - at Cold Stone Creamery or someplace like that they had to sing this stupid song if they got a tip. I would not tip because I felt the humiliation was not worth the quarter.

other fun bits:

-disingeniousness, cluelessness, and projection
-a total lack of the ability for introspection or self-reflection
-those who enable or commit acts of evil in the name of worshipping my God

Oh i have no problem with congeniality and polite greetings-in-passing, if you will("how ya doin'" or "evenin'" as you pass them) is just fine and makes things better.

I found a handmade sign on the ground today that said "It is a Karmic Boon to Kill Heretics!" by the DMV.

omg see if a waitress had the nerve to SIT down next to me and go over the drinks i would absolutely love her. i just love big personalities that way. i find a lot of ppl i am REALLY close with, tho, don't love big personalities. i do.

I think it's because people at those restaurants have drink quotas to meet, not "big personalities." ie my mom was the most placid person in the world except when she was putting on her dog-and-pony waitress act in the name of "gotta meet my dessert quota" when working at Applebee's.

here's what i CAN'T stand: the waitress who barely speaks to you, looks in the other direction, eyes half rolled, while ur wondering what to drink and huffs away with ur order. that makes me livid.

Maybe that lady's feet were really hurting.

hahaha right... i can see how that would rub u the wrong way.

if she worked that hard for her dessert quota tho i'd give her a smile.

Do Americans care too much about waiters?
I guess it's the whole tipping culture thingy.

lol honestly the image of a mom putting on a dog-and-pony waitress act for dessert just cracked me the eff up

i care a lot about customer service - i'm in a customer servie field and i'm a damn good customer service representative. i have my standards :-)

I just want my waiter to take my order and then leave a pitcher of water at my table so they don't have to worry about refilling (I ask them to do this bcz I am Thirsty Girl), then bring my check quickly. Good service that is considerate and polite, basically. Not like try to be my special time love way.

the check thing kills me. it's like i'm full, i wanna leave!!!

Sometimes a waitress's solicitude is the only love we get.

That is one bittersweet statement.

Well, it's true! So a waitress's genuine warmth is important! It's nurture!
I love Southern friendly/chattiness. Coastal New England crusty indifference is crap.

the check thing kills me. it's like i'm full, i wanna leave!!!

Or, I'd like to decide when I leave, not leave it up to the whims of the waitstaff.

Abbott OTM. I do not want the waiter to be my buddy. I do not want the manager to stop by unannounced to see how the day is going (yo, fucko, we were talking now - now scoot). I just want my food and drinks. Doesn't even have to be fast or completely correct - close is good.
You be cordial but uninvolved, I do the same, I'll leave you 25%, we all go home happy.

God, you guys are COLD. I may be full of hate, but I'm full of love, too. Perhaps I'm, I don't know. Insane?

Or just operatic.

at the risk of inciting the wrath of Remy:
being overly Christian

I don't like people with Jesus bumper stickers and t-shirts and who genuinely believe that one day God is going to come back and battle the Antichrist and everything. They creep me out. I don't like being around them.

sames.

"I'm a bigot, I know, but for the left."

Sometimes a waitress's solicitude is the only love we get.

this is amazing. thank you Beth!

I like when cars/SUVs have those big bumper stickers that say "IN CASE OF RAPTURE, CAR'S YOURS!" I think it is the only way I'll get a nice car someday.

to all the waiter-love haters: sometimes the reverse is also true - i just want to come take your damn order, smile and leave you to it, but goddamnit if some people want to give you their WHOLE life story and all their problems and tragedies. dude, i'll be your therapist, but i want a goddamn THERAPIST'S WAGE so i'll be sure to add $100 to your bill, k??

Oh no kidding, this is also why I wouldn't be a hairstylist.

don't get me wrong, i'm good at my job - really good (i.e. i know when and when not to be friendly with ppl) - but sometimes i wish i could wear headphones at work.

hairstylists can be so much fun - i just found a regular, Rose, and last time i went, it was right out of a show, talkin to the other ladies about their bla bla bla. actually it was mostly about tennis, french cup final, but this one older woman was complaining about her walk to the pharmacy.

Ruby when i get a really good waitress i tip and smile big!!

i mean, waitER...

I overtip as a rule. It's not much more out of my pocket and if everyone did it waiting on tables would actually provide a comfortable living wage, as it should. It's the highest-stress work out there, and waiters shouldn't have to have some annoying roommate in order to make the rent.

i <3 beth and surmounter. i need more customers like you.

and america needs more waitresses like me...

milo, i hate that i've get the rep of being the crypto-religion-defender on the board: i'm (embarrassedly) an ex-religion-basher myself, and now a committed agnostic with a thin skin for the type of BS behavior i usta pull. a few years ago i was very invested in arguing from an existentialist-naturalist perspective about the primacy and immediacy of empirical experience and the observable world, the social controls of religion and the historical efficacy of imposing magical beliefs - blah, blah, blah - until i realized i was occasionally prostelytizing intolerance of thought. but i've never meant to imply that i don't think there's merit in many of those arguments, just sometimes in the application of those arguments to demean other people.

fwiw i totally agree with you on in-your-face christianity being one of the most irritating things ever. especially in traffic jams. nothing like being stuck on the 405 for two hours behind a guy with a bumper sticker that says 'love your fellow man' and 'jesus saves' and thinking that if jesus were so good he'd get me out of the fucking pollution right now, and back home to my dog.

and america needs more waitresses like me...

Amen, sister.

CRUNCHY ALMOND BUTTER on toast pwns all.

As to the thread question ... um, stupidity? Snobbishness? Dogmatism? Self-absorption? Gang mentality? Emotional excess in a learned-helplessness, look-at-me style? (I am guilty of all of these at times.) If I narrow it down any more than that I'll be here all night, fizzing with hatred. Fascinating answers, though.

oooh the last one is baaaaad

CRINCHY almond butter sounds ridICULOUS

if jesus were so good he'd get me out of the fucking pollution right now, and back home to my dog.

Hmmmmm, that sounds like you sort of have a feeling of entitlement.

wow this thread is making me realize i am pretty much perfect! :) :) YAY!!!

but really, what i hate is when people decide they want to say something insightful with the stem of their eyewear posed inquisitively near/in their mouth - GRODEY, ugh!!!

No particular order:

1) Men who seem to think they're onstage at a comedy club and think that every single comment, question, or observation that occurs within earshot needs a comeback, remark, or putdown.
Don't get me wrong: I love good comedy, but I'm sure even Bill Hicks knew when to shut up and let others carry the conversation. Hanging out with a Jerry Seinfeld wannabe is fucking exhausting.

2) People who genuinely believe that their taste in music, art, or movies makes them more intelligent than the general populace.

3) Fanboys who complain bitterly that their favorite comic book wasn't properly adapted for the big screen. Spiderman and the like aren't made for hardcore comics fans, they're made for people who like to go to the movies, and and no amount of whining about "story arcs" and "multiple universes" is going to change that.

i don't like it when people take pride in never regretting anything; some things in life are regrettable. also, claiming that it is better to regret something you have done, than something you haven't, doesn't recognise that some things are best not done because the cost (to self and/or others) is too high.

i don't like it when people take pride in never regretting anything; some things in life are regrettable. also, claiming that it is better to regret something you have done, than something you haven't, doesn't recognise that some things are best not done because the cost (to self and/or others) is too high.

-- estela, Tuesday, August 7, 2007 11:59 PM (Yesterday) Bookmark Link

Agreed. Regret is part of being human. So are foresight and hindsight.

conformity, i don't like.

it bugs me when people (usually youngish girls, by which I mean under 30) feign a carefree, uninhibited manner and do things like start to do the hoky-poky when they know a boy is watching -- or just that anybody is watching. Acting in a way that says, "look at me; i'm cute" and you can tell that the person is watching themselves and wanting to be watched. Like many things that bug me, I think I used to do this.

I am bugged by those who talk and act as if they care the most about "tolerance" but think that primetime TV-watchers are brainwashed idiots and that basically everybody who doesn't mirror their habits are idiots. They have clearly defined ideas about high and low art/culture but would never confess to being snobs. Whatever they read or watch has to have a social message or lesson. These are the people who talk about how bad racism and inequality are and then make comments like, "you should just hire a Brazilian and pay them nothing to do that paintwork for you."

I am bugged by those who resent everyone else for what they have.

People who think that things are the most important, well, things, bug me. You know those people who have to have the very best set of knives even though they don't really cook or who care very very much about watches or sunglasses, who seem to fill their lives with a pursuit for products.

I don't hate any of the above, they just bug me.

I really dislike anyone in the service industry, be they a builder, plumber, waiter, taxi driver, delivery person, or anyone else who tells me outright lies about a) how much the thing they're serving me with is going to cost or b) how long it's going to take. I'm not a moron. I'd much rather somebody said "it will cost €8000 and take a month, because one of my guys is on holidays and I've got another job on at the moment, so I can't start till I finish that" than say "it'll cost €2000 and be done in a week", but then actually cost €8000 and take a month. Just like if someone loses my order or just fucks it up, I'd rather they just apologised and put it right than made up some fake kitchen fire or something.