"Foods" that need to be retired

They are fake "foods".

I distinctly felt a hint of betrayal when my 11-year-old mind figured out that Miracle Whip wasn't even mayonnaise.

I say delete fruit chews that are flavoured like fruit but made of cow and pig hides - why not just make em "Cow hide" flavour?

I also wish for Swedish FIsh to be re-named "red herrings"

I had a SDA friend as a kid whose parents, in a 'the body is a temple' moment wed to anti-meat hippyish pressure of the 70's gave up meat. Unfortunately, they gave up meat for fake meat and his mother once made some kind of soup out of baco'bits or something that still makes me retch to think of.

cow and pig hides

Gelatin? Responsible use of resources imso.

I'm tired of food that tastes like what it isn't.

pretty much all food is great ime

I hate food.

We get to play this game whenever we visit my diabetic father. We eat a cookie after dinner while he watches closely, finally asking as we're finishing, "So, anything seem different about that cookie?"

And by now, we know to say "Lemme guess, it's sugar free?"

The kids go over there and have a good time, and we suspect that they're getting their fair share of sugar-free snacks. Except that whatever it is in those snacks making them sweet still probably isn't good for them and with the actual sugar taken away, we suspect that the grandparents are loading them up a bit more than usual. "Well, they shouldn't be wound-up tonight because everything we gave them was sugar-free."

The long-term effects on the kids are minimal and as parents, we kind of have to either choose between the grandparents spoiling the kids a bit or us never ever getting any free time to ourselves ever again. But still. Let's not get too smug about aspartame, shall we?

so, would you have been able to tell that there was no sugar in the cookies?

"So, anything seem different about that cookie?"

"animal semen?"

All I knew was that cookie was sweet. I don't know if I can taste sugar specifically when I eat something.

Corn-syrup Coke and sugar Coke taste the same to me though I can tell a difference in its bubbliness.

"Threads" that need to be retired

"ILXors" that need to be retired.

http://www.babble.com/CS/blogs/strollerderby/T-Ball_06_039_website.jpg

I hate threads.

xpost

"posters who are on my nuts so much" that they must be tired

So true. I spent five too many minutes back there trying to come up with a "Kool-aid man throwing up" zinger and then realized, Why do I do this.

lol

Speaking of Zingers...

haha, yeh those are blaargh

I never trusted Snoopy again.

http://t0.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcS5ucv621AI1huQgcmw0TRGKN0Dfil03ru1w8t0XlXFHvxGOoOF

would you buy life insurance or crappy dessert snacks from this beagle??

http://t0.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcQeWuwnAZQvVYA_qLvMdQcK8FEk262Lsw2Q-a4ywoMJuJZwz7eY

You're gonna need the former if you choose the latter.

was gonna dump some aspartame on those zingers, but then i found out snoopy already dumped something on there

last thing i need is some tommy cruise-looking beagle pushing snack cakes on me tbh

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=h5u7moppmAs

i remember these being equally disappointing

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vyOiD5zXrCU

I kinda don't hate raspberry Zingers. It's been 10 years since I had one though.

snoopy brusha-bruaha toothbrush.

I am seriously wanting a sno cone now!

That marshmallow salad looks fucking vile. Dear lord.

Celery can go away quickly please. I'm pretty cool with everything else staying. It's not like I have to eat any of it.

1. Applesauce

2. Apple Juice

not a good start to the list

fried oreos

Celery?! What is with you savages?

i love celery w/ peanut butter

CELERY IS DISGUSTING AWFUL STUFF

Celery w/ peanut butter and/or cream cheese - obv have never touched it but it sounds like vom city to me.

I can sometimes now tolerate it if some evil people decide to sneak it into soups or salads. Sometimes. This is progress for me.

it doesnt taste like anything.

except maybe "water."

No celery salt without celery. Imo.

x-post - See people who don't mind celery say this or say it's just crunch but those of use who don't like it know what I mean. It has a very distinct taste and however "mild" that may be if it's not your thing, it's really fucking gross. Trust me on this one.

Celery is probably the least offensive vegetable there is. Also I'm not sure how you "retire" a vegetable

xp - Otm. I hate watercress way worse than celery and it is virtually tasteless.

Have I entered bizarro world? Celery is great and crunchy and slightly aromatic, esp if you keep the leaves and cress has a very decided taste and a little bite to it even.

Fwiw, I tend to love every green veg that you bring...

Oh I'm totally fine with watercress but I respect wanko's right to find a seemingly band veg horrible. It happens.

Never really eat watercress though. It's not something I come across often.

http://chosis.coldfusionvideo.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/01/pulp-fiction_1.jpg
"he just wants me to take care of the celery."
"like...'take care' of it?"

I made cress sandwiches not long ago. I prefer mint as a general rule.