"how about you cook me up a win"
― max, Monday, 8 August 2011 13:19 (twelve years ago) link
"wow i must be seeing things, a chef in the dugout, crazy"
― max, Monday, 8 August 2011 13:20 (twelve years ago) link
"i'm sorry, but paul simon is overrated, chef"
or, conversely, "Excuse me, are we in a restaurant?"
― Mark G, Monday, 8 August 2011 13:20 (twelve years ago) link
"excuse me, are we in a restaurant, or a baseball park, because it sure looks like baseball to me, get out of here chef"
― max, Monday, 8 August 2011 13:21 (twelve years ago) link
"Christ, what an asshole."
― Dave Zuul (Phil D.), Monday, 8 August 2011 13:22 (twelve years ago) link
"that uniform does not even meet the minimum regulations in our league!"
― Dark Noises from the Eurozone (Tracer Hand), Monday, 8 August 2011 13:25 (twelve years ago) link
"this is baseball, not cooking-ball"
― max, Monday, 8 August 2011 13:26 (twelve years ago) link
"L-R: Roger Sterling, Jesse Eisenberg, John Travolta, IRL Matt Damon that time he went shopping with the Office guy, a Chef"
― (oboe interlude) (schlump), Monday, 8 August 2011 13:27 (twelve years ago) link
"what a load of crepe"
― big triffid in my backyard (Edward III), Monday, 8 August 2011 13:27 (twelve years ago) link
"boss i tried to steal second base but i stole a chef by mistake, here he is, chef leon"
― max, Monday, 8 August 2011 13:28 (twelve years ago) link
"i bet you're familiar with hot streaks, amirite?"
― Dark Noises from the Eurozone (Tracer Hand), Monday, 8 August 2011 13:29 (twelve years ago) link
"what a croque, monsieur."
― estela, Monday, 8 August 2011 13:29 (twelve years ago) link
"i said we need a big HITTER, not a big DINNER!!!"
― Dark Noises from the Eurozone (Tracer Hand), Monday, 8 August 2011 13:30 (twelve years ago) link
"if you try to bunt with that pan i will eat your fucking head off"
― Dark Noises from the Eurozone (Tracer Hand), Monday, 8 August 2011 13:31 (twelve years ago) link
"Christ, what an asshole."^coming here to post that
― future events are now current events (Z S), Monday, 8 August 2011 14:26 (twelve years ago) link
batter joke was the first thing that came to mind; that feels like a winner.
― I'm a nerd and nerdy things happened (forksclovetofu), Monday, 8 August 2011 18:37 (twelve years ago) link
Though "There's no cooking in baseball" is a close second for the outdated reference/bone dry 'humor' combo
― I'm a nerd and nerdy things happened (forksclovetofu), Monday, 8 August 2011 18:38 (twelve years ago) link
"chef, what a casserole."
― Philip Nunez, Monday, 8 August 2011 19:14 (twelve years ago) link
change up, bunt cake, slide into hot plate, fry ball - could go for a racist angle with this one to double up, BLT sabermetric
― Roberto Spiralli, Monday, 8 August 2011 23:29 (twelve years ago) link
"O.K., we learned a lot this game, including you can't rush a soufflé." Submitted by Jay Solomon, New York, N.Y. "First base wants to know if you have anything gluten-free." Submitted by Michael Hicks New Orleans, La. "I trust you know what to do when you get to the plate." Submitted by Phil Rosenthal Chicago, Ill.
"First base wants to know if you have anything gluten-free." Submitted by Michael Hicks New Orleans, La.
"I trust you know what to do when you get to the plate." Submitted by Phil Rosenthal Chicago, Ill.
THESE ARE ALL RUBBISH!!
"Fellas, we need the best batter available."― Dark Noises from the Eurozone (Tracer Hand), Monday, 8 August 2011 11:12 (3 weeks ago) Bookmark Suggest Ban Permalink
― Dark Noises from the Eurozone (Tracer Hand), Monday, 8 August 2011 11:12 (3 weeks ago) Bookmark Suggest Ban Permalink
Was better than all those!
― Mark G, Tuesday, 30 August 2011 08:52 (twelve years ago) link
did people see the ... hoozit. jason sturm? james sturm? the 'golem's mighty swing' guy ... article on trying to break into new yorker cartooning?
― thomp, Tuesday, 30 August 2011 09:28 (twelve years ago) link
Mark I agree but it's not quite "New Yorker" enough (nor is their third option). It's more like... actual comedy. I'd expect the gluten-free joke to win. As I've said before, the ultimate New Yorker cartoon caption (invented by me) is "I'm tired of not having balsamic vinegar".
― TracerHandVEVO (Tracer Hand), Tuesday, 30 August 2011 09:38 (twelve years ago) link
The gluten-free option? We shall see in 2 weeks...
― Mark G, Tuesday, 30 August 2011 09:53 (twelve years ago) link
http://www.newyorker.com/images/2011/09/12/p465/110912_contest_p465.jpg
"You never see them at all on Dress-Down Friday"
― Mark G, Monday, 5 September 2011 09:48 (twelve years ago) link
Well, I liked it.
― Mark G, Monday, 5 September 2011 13:23 (twelve years ago) link
http://i.imgur.com/ajfXV.gif"I'm tired of not having balsamic vinegar"
too on the nose?
― Philip Nunez, Monday, 5 September 2011 16:43 (twelve years ago) link
I like your style way more than BEK's.
― c("c) (Leee), Monday, 5 September 2011 18:05 (twelve years ago) link
Before they ever had the caption contest, I came up with a New Yorker cartoon that would show two well-dressed women talking to each other at an art gallery, and one is saying to the other "My masseuse is out of champagne"
I think that could also be the ultimate caption contest caption
― Helping 3 (Hurting 2), Monday, 5 September 2011 19:07 (twelve years ago) link
btw the italics are an essential part of it
the captions are already in italics
― max, Monday, 5 September 2011 19:10 (twelve years ago) link
how the hell did tracer's not win
― iatee, Monday, 5 September 2011 19:11 (twelve years ago) link
http://i.imgur.com/UHOCr.gif
― Philip Nunez, Monday, 5 September 2011 20:17 (twelve years ago) link
Would vote for.
― c("c) (Leee), Monday, 5 September 2011 20:27 (twelve years ago) link
― max, Monday, September 5, 2011 3:10 PM Bookmark
So then "My masseuse is out of champagne."
― Helping 3 (Hurting 2), Monday, 5 September 2011 20:40 (twelve years ago) link
http://i55.tinypic.com/2n069g1.jpg"Chris, what an asshole."
― remember yr man when he's at wooooooooooork (Z S), Sunday, 18 September 2011 01:14 (twelve years ago) link
i recently started cutting out new yorker cartoons that works particularly well with that caption and placing them into a small journal dedicated to the subject. it's not my joke, of course, but i think it'll be fun to have a whole book full of them.
― remember yr man when he's at wooooooooooork (Z S), Sunday, 18 September 2011 01:15 (twelve years ago) link
Chris, huh?
― Leee, Lord of Wtfomgham (Leee), Sunday, 18 September 2011 01:52 (twelve years ago) link
That formulation would be your joke, though.
haha, whooooooops
― remember yr man when he's at wooooooooooork (Z S), Sunday, 18 September 2011 02:01 (twelve years ago) link
weird, i haven't cut anything out of magazines since.... don't even wanna play that game
a project like that ZS would equate to a decent tumblr, albeit one with followers wondering why you keep skipping months worth of comics
― Hullo, I'm Jon Moss (kelpolaris), Sunday, 18 September 2011 02:02 (twelve years ago) link
I dunno, man. letmec*monyourt*ts.tumblr.com is just not taking off.
― Philip Nunez, Sunday, 18 September 2011 04:37 (twelve years ago) link
I actually have a few ideas for the new one. Does anyone know if they let you submit multiple entries?
― jaymc, Friday, 30 September 2011 17:51 (twelve years ago) link
Just submit them as "Roger Ebert, Chicago"?
― Leee, Lord of Wtfomgham (Leee), Saturday, 1 October 2011 17:14 (twelve years ago) link
Ha. I found the FAQ: only one entry per e-mail address.
― jaymc, Saturday, 1 October 2011 17:55 (twelve years ago) link
http://www.newyorker.com/images/2011/10/10/p465/111010_contest_p465.jpg"Big Mouse Strikes Again!"
― Mark G, Friday, 7 October 2011 11:21 (twelve years ago) link
"In his favor, he's not as bad as my last boss."
― anorange (abanana), Friday, 7 October 2011 11:42 (twelve years ago) link
"lol, we fucked up that mouse's office but good"
― Roberto Spiralli, Friday, 7 October 2011 11:45 (twelve years ago) link
"This is normal."
― TracerHandVEVO (Tracer Hand), Friday, 7 October 2011 12:28 (twelve years ago) link
I actually just entered that.
― TracerHandVEVO (Tracer Hand), Friday, 7 October 2011 12:34 (twelve years ago) link