Conservapedia - An encyclopedia you can trust

http://i.dailymail.co.uk/i/pix/2008/10/24/article-1080423-023C5883000005DC-882_468x343.jpg

sup

R.I.P. Liberace

goddam Jerry Lee Lewis, brah

I'm guessing StanM knows that, and was adding Liberace to the list of long-lived "godless" enetertainers, but in both cases, HA!

Conservapedia is alternately hilarious and brain-breaking.

xpost: I know, just kidding indeed

Conservapedia is alternately hilarious and brain-breaking.

I think it has somehow devolved from regular nonsense & cut-rate pretzel-logic into a lunatic fever-dream of nonsense.

Literally cannot tell anymore if articles have been hacked. Ever since the "atheists are fat, believers are svelte" thing, it all looks like a joke (moreso than usual.)

i think it began as a somewhat serious project but has since devolved into something to keep phyllis schlafly's simple child busy during the day

"According to the CUNY 2000 religious survey, Washington was declared to have the second highest per capita number of people in the United States who answered "no religion" on a survey.[1] 28% of the Oregon population declared they had "no religion".[2] In 2010, the state of Washington has the highest number of reported cases of bestiality in the United States even though it was merely the 13th most populous state according to the 2010 United States.[3][4]

See also: Atheism and bestiality"

"According to the CUNY 2000 religious survey,

I'm almost afraid to go see what they make of the fact that Utah buys and downloads more Internet porn than any other state, until I consider that they probably think Mormonism isn't a real religion..

His worst Masters performance in 17 years and a tie for distant 41st place, plus swearing and kicking one of his clubs -- that's how the lamestream media's favorite to win, Tiger Woods, did. [6] Can't liberals find someone else to promote?

http://conservapedia.com/Mystery:Did_God_cause_the_unlikely_result_of_Tim_Tebow_ending_up_in_the_New_York_media_market%3F

Jesus compared with Hugo Chavez: Jesus prayed, "O Father, if You can, let this cup pass from Me. But don't do what I want, but rather what You want." Matthew 26:39. In contrast, Communist dictator "Hugo Chavez weeps and calls on God to spare his life." [1]

Question for evolutionists/atheists: Why do you futilely persist in preaching your nonsense? Your ideology is feeble, declining and doomed (See: Decline of atheism) and the Question evolution! campaign and its 15 questions for evolutionists will accelerate the decline of atheism.

"preaching"

Please note: Mitt Romney is not endorsed by Conservapedia

Willard Mitt Romney (born March 12, 1947) sometimes referred to as Multiple Choice Mitt(do to his frequent flip flopping) is a RINO (Republican in name only) and former governor of Massachusetts and wealthy (thru his family) U.S. businessman, is currently a contender in the 2012 Republican Primary and was first runner-up for the nomination in 2008.

Following the split of the first three major elections in the 2008 primaries, Ron Kaufman, a top adviser to Romney, stated that the battle between the top three candidates "is going to be like the Bataan Death March."

The Bataan Death March resulted in the death of approximately 9,000 prisoners of war during World War II, and has been labeled as a war crime.

Romney claims to maintains a stable marriage with his wife Ann, with whom he has five children.

http://conservapedia.com/Professor_values

The analytical rigour of the entire entry http://conservapedia.com/Liberalism is dazzling but this struck me as especially special:

Liberal conservatism is simply a variant of conservatism willing to allow for individual liberties, and, in a way, describes the ideology of the American Republican Party. Such examples of this obvious line of thought include the civil rights movement, when the Republican Party (and a few southern Democrats) just wanted to maintain the African American's right to have the choice of forced segregation.

gotta be a poe.

Tim Thomas hockey A conservative, Thomas declined to attend a ceremony staged by the Obama White House after Thomas's team won the Stanley Cup.[2] Thomas is a four-time NHL All-Star as a goalie - a great conservative position to play![3]

omg lol

http://conservapedia.com/Mystery:Was_Charles_Fefferman_Homeschooled%3F

lolol

Hahaha, thanks Charlie!

lolllll

this entire category is gold:

http://conservapedia.com/Category:Mystery

The term "eternity" rarely occurs in the Old Testament, and when it does occur it does not have the modern sense.

The Greek words for eternity, "aion" and "aionios", lack the full Christian meaning also.[1]

Jesus and his disciples mention "eternity" nearly 70 times in the New Testament. Was this a new concept that originated with Christianity?

Yes, let's just ignore the far older Egyptian & Occidental traditions. So this concept that we are defining solely according Christianity - did it originate with Christianity?

Occidental AND Oriental i mean

http://conservapedia.com/Mystery:Did_God_cause_the_unlikely_result_of_Tim_Tebow_ending_up_in_the_New_York_media_market%3F

O_o

Mystery:Why Do Non-Conservatives Exist?

Debate:Listing the Earth's most pressing needs in urgent order of fixing

1) preventing gay marriage 2) preventing abortion 3) putting the 10 commandments in schools 4) convincing the global scientific community that evolution is false 5) defeating terrorism indefinitely and continuously 6) stopping liberals 7) keeping guns 8) stopping socialised health care 9) preventing environmentalist lies from damaging America's economy 10) making the speed of light more scriptural 11) abolishing public education 12) promoting conservative facts

gotta go with "making the speed of light more scriptural" at #1 I think

c for christ

They forgot "promoting homeschooling."

sorry for the obvious ad hominem blast but fuck these incredible dicks. I have seriously had it up to here with idiot conservatives

their troll game is way next level - the conservapedia bible project is just incredible, if you read the page about it you'll...you know, don't, just trust me, it's completely insane

maybe later, i don't want to angry up my entire week

10) making the speed of light more scriptural

This sounds cool!

The earliest, most authentic manuscripts of the Gospel According to Luke lack this verse fragment set forth at the start of Luke 23:34:[13]

Jesus said, "Father, forgive them, for they do not know what they are doing."

Is this a corruption of the original, perhaps promoted by liberals without regard to its authenticity? This does not appear in any other Gospel, and the simple fact is that some of the persecutors of Jesus did know what they were doing.

What really amazes me is the number of people who really believe in the idea of a trustworthy conservative encyclopedia, and are then disillusioned when Andy Schlafly calls them liberals for attempting to point out that maybe Sharon Tate wasn't a victim of "Hollywood Values."

So God created gigantic crocodile-like creatures, and made the waters teem with every moving creature after its kind, and every winged bird after its kind. God deemed this good.

I feel like something is lost in translation.

god deemed this wicked sick

http://conservapedia.com/Evolutionists_who_have_had_problems_with_being_overweight_and/or_obese

lolomgwtf

Also:

Considering his major themes, Shakespeare is undoubtedly a conservative figure by today's standards. Major conservative themes in his works include the sacred nature of the familial structure in King Lear, the recognition of God in his plays and personal life, the existence of necessary war in The Famous Life of King Henry V, and the exposed injustice of taxation in Coriolanus. Not surprisingly, modern liberal literary critics often ignore these themes because of their place on the modern political spectrum.

"As of May 2011, Richard Dawkins and Sam Harris have not publicly commented on the significant problems the New Atheism leadership has experienced in terms of overweight members."

Conservative Bible isn't very conservative with it's exclamation points.

Tribalism rarely gets painted in such bright bold colors

This shit always makes me think of this:

Mayor Quimby, you're well-known, sir, for your lenient stance on
crime. But suppose for a second that _your_ house was ransacked
by thugs, _your_ family tied up in the basement with socks in
their mouths, you try to open the door but there's too much
_blood_ on the knob --
Quimby: What is your question?
Barlow: My question is about the budget, sir.

conservapvmic