shit that looks like an onion article but isn't

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three weeks pass...

Rebel Discovers Qaddafi Passport, Real Spelling of Leader's Name

Alba, Thursday, 25 August 2011 07:38 (thirteen years ago) link

love that the image for that article is this:

http://cdn.theatlantic.com/static/mt/assets/international/assets_c/2011/08/qaddafi%20passport%20p-thumb-600x300-61429.jpg

peter in montreal, Thursday, 25 August 2011 15:14 (thirteen years ago) link

one month passes...

They even mention how similar this is to a specific Onion article inside.

Al Qaeda slams Iran for peddling 9/11 conspiracy theories

Pleasant Plains, Thursday, 29 September 2011 16:28 (thirteen years ago) link

"The Iranian government has professed on the tongue of its president Ahmadinejad that it does not believe that al Qaeda was behind 9/11 but rather, the U.S. government," an article in Inspire's latest issue argued, according to ABC News' Lee Ferrin. "So we may ask the question: why would Iran ascribe to such a ridiculous belief that stands in the face of all logic and evidence?"

Pleasant Plains, Thursday, 29 September 2011 16:28 (thirteen years ago) link

one month passes...

On cnn.com right now:

http://oi43.tinypic.com/v82dfr.jpg

sktsh, Wednesday, 16 November 2011 18:57 (twelve years ago) link

loll

Roberto Spiralli, Wednesday, 16 November 2011 19:13 (twelve years ago) link

Ha there was something that rolled by the CNN news ticker this morning that said something like "COMMUNISM MORE POPULAR THAN CONGRESS AMONG US PUBLIC"

⚓ (gr8080), Wednesday, 16 November 2011 19:54 (twelve years ago) link

two months pass...

Michael Brendan Dougherty
Pascal-Emmanuel Gobry

buzza, Wednesday, 8 February 2012 22:23 (twelve years ago) link

http://static7.businessinsider.com/image/4edfdcba6bb3f7c75a000002-195/michael-brendan-dougherty.jpg

Before joining Business Insider, Michael Brendan Dougherty was Associate Editor of The American Conservative.

buzza, Wednesday, 8 February 2012 22:27 (twelve years ago) link

I xposted that to SEO hall of fame

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=s1tAYmMjLdY (dayo), Friday, 10 February 2012 23:14 (twelve years ago) link

If they hate it so much, why build the town there. It's like building a town at the bottom of a lake and complaining about the lack of oxygen.

Not only dermatologists hate her (James Morrison), Thursday, 23 February 2012 01:07 (twelve years ago) link

http://tpmmuckraker.talkingpointsmemo.com/2012/03/sc_county_gop_if_youve_had_pre-marital_sex_you_can.php?ref=fpb

Before you can join the Laurens County Republican Party in South Carolina and get on the primary ballot, they ask that you pledge that you’ve never ever had pre-marital sex — and that you will never ever look at porn again.

Last Tuesday, the LCGOP unanimously adopted a resolution that would ask all candidates who want to get on the primary ballot to sign a pledge with 28 principles, because the party “does not want to associate with candidates who do not act and speak in a manner that is consistent with the SC Republican Party Platform.”

Among the principles, according to Vic MacDonald & Larry Franklin of the Clinton Chronicle, is standard fare like opposition to abortion and upholding gun rights, as well as “a compassionate and moral approach to Teen Pregnancy” and “a high regard for United States Sovereignty.”

But then they get even more specific. From the Chronicle:

You must favor, and live up to, abstinence before marriage.
You must be faithful to your spouse. Your spouse cannot be a person of the same gender, and you are not allowed to favor any government action that would allow for civil unions of people of the same sex.

You cannot now, from the moment you sign this pledge, look at pornography.

It is unclear how they will precisely determine this (or regulate it), but an unidentified potential candidate for office in Laurens County told the Chronicle that candidates will be interviewed by a three-person subcommittee, who will then recommend to the full executive committee whether to allow the candidate on the ballot.

Flagpost Sitta (Phil D.), Tuesday, 6 March 2012 11:39 (twelve years ago) link

THE EATBEAT: Long-awaited Olive Garden receives warm welcome

After a lengthy wait for Olive Garden to open in Grand Forks, the lines were long in February. The novelty is slowly wearing off, but the steady following attests the warm welcome.

My first visit to Olive Garden was during midafternoon, so I could be sure to get in. After a late breakfast, I figured a late lunch would be fashionable.

The place is impressive. It’s fashioned in Tuscan farmhouse style with a welcoming entryway. There is seating for those who are waiting.

My booth was near the kitchen, and I watched the waiters in white shirts, ties, black trousers and aprons adorned with gold-colored towels. They were busy at midday, punching in orders and carrying out bread and pasta.

It had been a few years since I ate at the older Olive Garden in Fargo, so I studied the two manageable menus offering appetizers, soups and salads, grilled sandwiches, pizza, classic dishes, chicken and seafood and filled pastas.

At length, I asked my server what she would recommend. She suggested chicken Alfredo, and I went with that. Instead of the raspberry lemonade she suggested, I drank water.

She first brought me the familiar Olive Garden salad bowl with crisp greens, peppers, onion rings and yes — several black olives. Along with it came a plate with two long, warm breadsticks.

The chicken Alfredo ($10.95) was warm and comforting on a cold day. The portion was generous. My server was ready with Parmesan cheese.

As I ate, I noticed the vases and planters with permanent flower displays on the ledges. There are several dining areas with arched doorways. And there is a fireplace that adds warmth to the decor.

Olive Garden has an attractive bar area to the right of the entryway. The restaurant has a full liquor license and a wine list offering a wide selection to complement Italian meals. Nonalcoholic beverages include coolers, specialty coffees and hot teas.

On a hot summer day, I will try the raspberry lemonade that was recommended.

There’s a homemade soup, salad and breadstick lunch available until 4 p.m. daily for $6.95.

An olive branch on menu items signified low-fat entrees. There is a Garden Fare Nutrition Guide available for customers seeking gluten-free food. And for those with food allergies, Olive Garden has an Allergen Information Guide.

All in all, it is the largest and most beautiful restaurant now operating in Grand Forks. It attracts visitors from out of town as well as people who live here.

Olive Garden is part of the Darden chain of restaurants that also operates Red Lobster. There are about 700 restaurants, including four Olive Gardens in North Dakota’s major cities.

Olive Garden has gained a following since 1982 with its ample portions and relaxed ambience. It’s known for its classic lasagna, fettuccine Alfredo and chicken Parmigiana.

the Hilary Clinton of Ghostface Killahs (Phil D.), Thursday, 8 March 2012 14:37 (twelve years ago) link

At length, I asked my server what she would recommend.

oh to be a fly on the wall

brownie, Thursday, 8 March 2012 14:43 (twelve years ago) link

xpost: I don't get it?

StanM, Thursday, 8 March 2012 14:45 (twelve years ago) link

I like that either definition (after a long pause / over a long period of time) suggests he is possibly an asshole / savouring the plum assignment of his career, the one he'll tell the grandkids about.

xpost I think it's the in depth and lingering discussion of a generic chain restaurant, but then I am not an American.

Andrew Farrell, Thursday, 8 March 2012 14:47 (twelve years ago) link

oh, I didn't know what Olive Garden was - didn't seem to get that vibe from the site either, but ok :-)

StanM, Thursday, 8 March 2012 14:55 (twelve years ago) link

EAT STREET / THE KING OF THE EAT

lou reed scott walker monks niagra (chinavision!), Thursday, 8 March 2012 15:09 (twelve years ago) link

aahhh EAT BEAT, mangled it never mind

lou reed scott walker monks niagra (chinavision!), Thursday, 8 March 2012 15:11 (twelve years ago) link

I often enjoy reading effusive community newspaper prose on banal topics, but that's an especially fine example.

simulation and similac (Hurting 2), Thursday, 8 March 2012 15:18 (twelve years ago) link

I love the image of Grand Forksians "long awaiting" the Olive Garden.

simulation and similac (Hurting 2), Thursday, 8 March 2012 15:20 (twelve years ago) link

"On a hot summer day, I will try the raspberry lemonade that was recommended."

Please report back!

simulation and similac (Hurting 2), Thursday, 8 March 2012 15:20 (twelve years ago) link

This article is beyond description.

Ned Raggett, Thursday, 8 March 2012 15:31 (twelve years ago) link

"I was given a selection of food items to choose from. I indicated my preferences to the server, and some time later, those selections were brought to the table for me to eat!"

Three Word Username, Thursday, 8 March 2012 15:36 (twelve years ago) link

http://www.grandforksherald.com/media/story/jpg/2010/09/09/marilynhagerty.jpg Crazy Bread, Super Pretzels, Dippin’ Dots, cotton candy, bratwursts and beer. Popcorn, prime rib sandwiches, freshly roasted almonds.

ಠ﹏ಠ i am dissapoint (diamonddave85), Thursday, 8 March 2012 15:38 (twelve years ago) link

Drinking water with her meal = why she's lived to be such an active 85-year-old.

pplains, Thursday, 8 March 2012 15:41 (twelve years ago) link

oh shit max just tweeted this

the Hilary Clinton of Ghostface Killahs (Phil D.), Thursday, 8 March 2012 15:42 (twelve years ago) link

it's all happening

the Hilary Clinton of Ghostface Killahs (Phil D.), Thursday, 8 March 2012 15:42 (twelve years ago) link

I saw this tweeted last night. Max, get on the ball.

pplains, Thursday, 8 March 2012 15:44 (twelve years ago) link

Grandfawker

pplains, Thursday, 8 March 2012 15:44 (twelve years ago) link

someone from grand forks tweets at me:

@max_read she's such a trooper - the week after her cancer diagnosis she reviewed Altru Hospital's room service #eatbeat

max, Thursday, 8 March 2012 16:10 (twelve years ago) link

Is it OK to still think this is funny then?

Waxahachie Swap (Jimmy The Mod Awaits The Return Of His Beloved), Thursday, 8 March 2012 16:15 (twelve years ago) link

yeah

max, Thursday, 8 March 2012 16:16 (twelve years ago) link

its a gentle, loving mockery

max, Thursday, 8 March 2012 16:16 (twelve years ago) link

That is actually amazing.

the Hilary Clinton of Ghostface Killahs (Phil D.), Thursday, 8 March 2012 16:17 (twelve years ago) link

guys guys guys... what if she's actually trolling us w this article?

Waxahachie Swap (Jimmy The Mod Awaits The Return Of His Beloved), Thursday, 8 March 2012 16:18 (twelve years ago) link

I think she is.

http://www.accessmylibrary.com/article-1G1-165736373/grand-forks-herald-n.html

Eric H., Thursday, 8 March 2012 17:00 (twelve years ago) link

"The big soft shell at first glance reminded me of lefse"

Eric H., Thursday, 8 March 2012 17:01 (twelve years ago) link

and yes — several black olives

diamanda ram dass (Edward III), Thursday, 8 March 2012 17:49 (twelve years ago) link

Gawker is on it. Not via max but anyway:

http://gawker.com/5891587/grand-forks-olive-garden-receives-positive-review

Ned Raggett, Thursday, 8 March 2012 17:52 (twelve years ago) link

i can't even

goole, Thursday, 8 March 2012 17:53 (twelve years ago) link

Only time will tell if the still-too-new OG will rise to the top of the list: http://www.urbanspoon.com/lb/152/best-restaurants-Grand-Forks

Eric H., Thursday, 8 March 2012 18:15 (twelve years ago) link


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