Innocuous things that make you irrationally angry (a list thread)

When I was a kid, my family called the automated system voice Beverly. If you were on a long call like that, you spent a long time talking to Beverly. I would sit around and try to imitate the hyper"nice" way Beverly talked. I think maybe I did sound like Beverly on the phone, if Beverly had been a two-pack-a-day smoker for four years.

I feel you but automated systems need clearly marked escape hatches for ppl who actually need to speak to a human. I had to call Amtrak way too many times this past week for an issue requiring human customer service and having to deal with the fake chipper AI, Julie, every time while she listed the 15 things I didn't need so I could go to the sub menu of 15 more things I didn't need until I just mashed the keypad with my palm and got connected to a human did not exactly put me in the mood to be nice to anybody. (I was nice, btw. But it took some intentional effort.)

Then to be on hold for the human and have to hear a looped recording about how Julie could help me with the 30 things I didn't need help with... rage rage rage.

(and this all to confirm that yes, we still want to travel as scheduled even though you are now doing apparently completely unpredictable "scheduled maintenance" that you did not schedule far enough in advance to warn us when we bought the tickets and now have to take a fucking bus for four hours, yes, Julie, where is your option for that????)

"Just answer Yes or No"

YES!

"Just answer Yes or No"

YES!

"Just answer Yes or No"

YES!

Just hit 0 - escape hatch

Xpost Actually that is prob just a bored employee fucking with you

It is my lifelong dream to be a Speak 'n Spell

Just hit 0 - escape hatch

I'm sorry. That is not a valid selection. Please choose from the following options: to hear schedules, press or say one. For existing reservations, press or say two. To learn about our frequent riders' program, press or say three.

Ten minutes later…

To learn about the materials used to manufacture the hand soap in our bathrooms, press or say 14. To have an Amtrak representative come to your location and put you out of your misery, press or say 15.

agggh the worst part was that I was just calling because we had moved and needed the service moved over, but we weren't even allowed to get ANY support because apparently our bill was unpaid (the check had been in the mail for nearly a week!)

Just hit 0 - escape hatch
I'm sorry. That is not a valid selection.

or *, or #. hammering one of those good and hard several times usually does the trick for me.

EDF have moved to a spoken word driven system. i don't trust it to be able to tell the difference between "five" and "nine" anymore than i trusted my phone to handle 12 digit cc numbers without double registering digits under the old system. so yes, human operator every time.

i was deep in some help centre labyrinth before and had been put on hold about 5 times and after quite a long wait i just shouted "THIS IS FUCKING SHIT" in anger, at precisely the moment someone was like "hello o2" or whatever. they just got "FUCKING SHIT" in response.

my brother told me that some call centres for big companies have a way to monitor and if you swear or shout they answer quicker. a fact we all should live by.

Liquid soap pump dispensers.

I get fed up with trying to 'activate' them. And so they I just attach the old pump to the new bottle, and feel annoyed about the few ml's of liquid soap left in the new pump. I also feel inadequate because even my dad seems to be able to activate the pump without too many problems...not to diss my dad, but he does have a sort of learned luddite-ism over anything invented after the record player.

XPs to Latham Green:

Sections/tabs of websites that are headed "contact us" but instead of leading to an informative section with phone number, address, email location and opening hours, automatically opens a 'mailto' email in Internet explorer or some shit.

WEL ITS BLOODY WELL GETTIN GMENTIONED AGAIN

Things that get mentioned more than once on the same thread. >:-(

Things that get mentioned more than once on the same thread.

things that get pointed out as having been posted more than once on the same thread

6342 post clusterfuck threads

xp 6343

aaaaaaaiiiiiiiiiiiiighhhhhhhhhh!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

the word "unpack" when talking about arguments rather than luggage

there is no rational reason for me to fly into a rage whenever I see that, but hey

what about the linux file type

I'm fine with that, too

just don't ask me to "unpack" my argument; I will explain, I will expand, I will reframe, I WILL NEVER UNPACK

don tback down either

anonymous sneaky ppl who take only one-half of single serving food items from the kitchen. don't want your sloppy seconds half breakfast burrito! >:\ (except maybe sorta i _do_?)

okay PLEASE do not refer to food as "sloppy seconds"

hahaha omg

when u love food too much

"Is that half of Nikki Six's breakfast burrito? I'll pass."

"We'll just tell your mother we ate it all."

tongue kissing hot chicks!

that makes you angry?

When you finally get home from work and have a free night w/ no commitments and are free to rlax all night and the first thing you notice when you get home is that the internet is down

I have fucking had it: customer whose knee jerk reaction is to blame us for a problem when it's their own fault. We spend all afternoon pulling data only to find the fuckup is on their end. Once a week or more we get some urgent capslocked cc-all-of- management email that says "why is x doing y, we are getting complaints"

BECAUSE YOU ARE MORONS

yea the inability for management to give benefit of the doubt is rationally angering imo

customer whose knee jerk reaction is to blame us for a problem when it's their own fault

^^^ this made up half of the calls I dealt with as an IT helpdesk jockey.

I remember once dealing with a lady who was extremely irascible even upon hearing my voice for the first time. It wasn't even her account, it was her husband's, but I think he was out on disability.

she's being shrill and screaming about a threat to cancel insurance if no payment is received, apparently she didn't get any bills and instead of y'know calling and going 'what's the deal', she just assumed she didn't have to pay. On looking further, the reason she hadn't been getting the bills is cuz they moved and never notified us, which of course she then denied ("oh WE CALLED YOU BACK IN JULY OF XX YEAR")...and of course the call history showed they'd NEVER called us before, which she then denied ("Oh you all just erased the records"...which, mind you, isn't even possible, due to the way the call logging program is set up).

She complained about me to the company, even called me 'boy' once, and when my call was reviewed of course nothing came of it. But then after I got promoted, she called back and this time was causing a ruckus about some service that wasn't 'paid right' for her husband. we didn't handle claims so we referred her to the advocate service -- she claimed she'd already called them, and that they 'couldn't help' and that in the past she'd called our advocate group to get resolution (which was true...but the client we worked with quit paying for it and went with another provider...so they were now unavailable). She kept insisting that we transfer her to the old advocate group despite our insistence that they weren't under contract anymore, so we couldn't do that.

THEN, finally...she got another 'you will be cancelled if you continue to be delinquent' letters and was blowing her stack at one of my employees, and the reason she got the letter was because she juxtaposed the numbers in the 'cents' field of the check she wrote, so she was short by a little. Rather than say "oops my mistake, I'll fix it on the next check" which woulda been fine, as we told her, she blew up and said she wrote the check right, and we screwed up...so we had to pull the check, and lo and behold...she did screw it up.

MORAL OF THE STORY: Rotten apples like this ruin it for the whole barrel.

http://i51.tinypic.com/2v2fc3k.jpg

hate these cheap ass tiny mice so much

Are they so cheap they have no cords? Would be great if you plugged it in and then couldn't move it because it was all one piece of plastic.

Also, DVD box sets of 4 movies that describe themselves as QUADRILOGIES. That is not a fucking word! Use TETRALOGY!

Also, DVD box sets of 4 movies that describe themselves as QUADRILOGIES. That is not a fucking word! Use TETRALOGY!

OMG YES

yes I hate frenching!

they have cords, the cord retracts and coils (poorly) around that lozenge thing

well, I call them tongues

People confusing "virgin birth" with "Immaculate Conception." I'm not even a theist, let alone Catholic, but this bugs the ever-loving shit out of me.

OMG YES.

shit you'd be surprised at how many Catholics don't even know that

Er, well til a google just now I didnt either. But I know pretty much zero about catholicism.

well it doesn't help that so many adults teach it wrong.

I actually learned it when I was 15 because I missed it as a question on one of the YOu Don't Know Jack games

I knew, but didn't know how recent both the immaculate conception (1854) and the original sin problem it solved (5th century, st. augustine) were. ( http://www.biblicalheritage.org/Beliefs/differences.htm )

those kwazy Catholics

Neanderthal, I have found it is generally Catholics who don't know the difference.

i should ask my dad (a former catholic) if he knows