ILE rolling non-slam Tennis thread

I saw the second set of Ward/Queer Eye yesterday. Ward has a big serve and Queer Eye seemed really off apart from his own big serve, which probably explains his above-average performance on grass.

Lucic/Ivanovic earlier may have been the worst pro tennis match I've ever seen, really disgusting stuff. Lucic is 29 goddamn years old and has no idea how to control her power at all, and cannot sustain any rally beyond two shots. Ivanovic did her best to sink to Lucic's level for a while but it was impossible to match really.

lisicki in the semifinals makes me really happy

And Barthel :D

Haha Serena drew Venus-slayer Pironkova. As good a 1st round as I could have hoped for!

lol this draw is insane. vika-peng and venus-petko in the first round as well

bepa-serena in the 2nd round!

Eastbourne draw got me HYPED. Funny that the most overranked player drew the most underranked! So weird to look at it and think, Ekaterina Makarova is the defending champion (and it wasn't like it was a weak draw last year). Azarenka/Peng and Bepa/Watson 1Rs!

Nice to see Murray thrashing Roddick so comprehensively.

All-Philipp final in Halle should be good.

Definitely pulling for Lisicki to win Edgbaston today too - bit sad she put out Peng in the SF though, Peng is really really overdue a first title.

Loved that thrashing of Murray's -- hate when Roddick makes a joke out of it, tho'.

The way Tsonga put out that plucky British player who will surely go back down the rankings again is what I forgotten Brit Tennis was -- the hopeless cheering and weary acceptance. We'll miss Murray in a few years when its back to this.

It's been said before, but Petzschner is a very handsome man.

Kohlschreiber played the best point in that TB, sneaking into net on the Petzschner serve and putting it away on the third volley.

Venus beats Petko in 3.

I know Venus has barely played for the last year but a loss to Andrea on grass still would have been unacceptable, so yay.

that was pretty much exactly the kind of match Venus needed. gutted out a long match against an excellent player who hadn't lost her opening match all year.

Serena on the other hand...I guess this isn't entirely shocking given everything, and she'll doubtless improve, but it's like she's forgotten how to play tennis.

Avoided the bagel!

(tbh I wouldn't be shocked if she ended up winning this match)

pironkova has won 4 matches this year

(tbh I wouldn't be shocked if she ended up winning this match)

lol lex, or should I say THE AMAZING KRESKIN

haw I had to google kreskin

there were a couple of signs right at the end of the first set that Serena was beginning to land her shots (I mean just land them in court, not play amazingly well), and it was also evident that Pironkova was pretty terrible herself. basically as long as Serena could avoid falling away scoreline-wise like she did in the first set, she'd be fine. Positive match really. Slow reaction times probably the most glaring hole, so many times she'd just stand there and look confused as a Pironkova puffball drifted past her for a winner. Think the most positive thing, given her ailments, is that her stamina seemed fine over a pretty long match.

OMG elsewhere St Kim lost to OPRANDI :o :o

apparently Oprandi just hit a ton of dropshots (including three dropshot returns in one game) and the Saint responded in true Davenport style of just turning away immediately

lol

SERENA <<<<<<<<<<<3

Honestly I can barely contain myself. Pulmonary embolism just a few months ago and she toughs out her first match back. I am ecstatic. I had to record the match because I had an a level exam when the match was on! Ugh so inconsiderate.

Yelling at my tv screen how I've missed thee <3 Oh and her movement was good! Thank fuck! Serve was like a different stroke completely from the first set to the second and third.

Ugh at the crowd cheering the time code violation. She's been out for a year give her a break please.

And Clijsters lost you say? I LOVE LIFE.

Oh and lmfao @ Pironkova's forehand. I knew it was bad, but that stroke is Bacsinszky level awful.

Ugh at the crowd cheering the time code violation. She's been out for a year give her a break please.

the ump overlooked the audible obscenity and racquet smashing earlier

I wonder in what manner Ivanovic will lose to Venus tomorrow? Choke or just straight-up thrashing.

It's not so much she looked over the racquet smashing... More that you can't give a violation if they play the next point with it.

I wonder if whilst Serena's foot was still total shit she sat in a chair or something and just practiced volleys. They were on point.

Serena 8, Venus 24. Like it matters. But, sensible enough, I suppose.

More pissed that they've bumped up Roddick to 8 ensuring he's insulated from the big four til a round later. God Roddick has been so lucky with this over the years. Strikes me as clear that he wouldn't have had such a good record in the first place if they never did this, but because he had a good record they have to keep doing this.

my 15th year of yelling that they shouldn't fuck with the rankings to seed players ever. can't believe people are actually complaining about how little they've been bumped, entitled babies!

Venus played AWESOME against Ivanovic. Serena's playing pretty well here but Bepa is a joke.

Venus was so good.

Surprised Serena got so close to beating Zvonareva! Was expecting something like 6-2 6-4 for Vera but Serena's hitting has improved dramatically since yesterday. Seems totally fatigued now though, ugh. Good effort against the world #3 either way.

This match is taking soooooo loooooong.

Silliams is not playing badly, but she is being very careful, and it's still scratchy. Basically she's beatable (if you're half-decent) but you have to go out and do something for the win. Bepa did nothing on court until 3-5 in the second set - no changing direction, no aggression, no hitting hard - since then she's been SLIGHTLY better and it's been just enough.

Third set will depend on Serena's stamina, I guess.

Just be aggressive and move forward for a volley on every point, Serena. Win or lose.

Kim Possible is out of Wimbledon. Venus win?

Venus was more likely to win anyway.

I really hope St Kim retires soon.

Can't predict anything til the draw comes out really.

Well, we can predict Bepa won't be defending her points. She's gone so shit in the past few months.

How many match points will Bepa waste before losing the match?

i HATE Bepa

Serena WTF

Promising signs :) I'll forget the start and end of the 3rd set.

Finally over. Bepa should hang her head in shame about most of that match though.

hey y'all HBO has a new documentary McEnroe and Borg: Fire and Ice

http://www.nydailynews.com/entertainment/tv/2011/06/10/2011-06-10_in_mcenroe__borg_an_unbeatable_match.html

watched it this weekend, really great. some amazing footage of some of their classic matches and really goes into their kinda complex relationship....

both of them were really something in their day.

loool andy's mum.

andreapetkovic Andrea Petkovic

Sooo @judmoo,I met Deliciano today and he was wondering if you would be willing to coach us for our mixed doubles?Ur experience!What u say?
15 hours ago

judmoo judy murray

So @andreapetkovic + @feliciano_lopez thanks 4 job offer but my advisers @andy_murray + @jamie_murray say I wud not b gd 4 ur street cred :(
11 hours ago

a couple of weeks ago Judy Murray and Petkovic were talking at length about how fit "Deliciano" was, until Andy had to step in with a "GUYS THIS IS MAKING ME FEEL AWKWARD" tweet

Judy Murray would be a bit much to actually follow on Twitter, I feel

Q. Potentially if you and Serena have those seedings, you could play as early as round 3 if you both win early matches.

Journalists really need to learn how tennis draws work.

Eh judy's twitter is far more entertaining than either of her sons'. Wish I had thought of 'Deliciano' tbh.

ewwwwwwwwww Venus. Not having a loss to Hantuchova

Don't tell me Hantuchova's becoming mentally stable. Yuck.

Oh my fuck. Hantuchova's fistpumps and constant looks to her camp are vile. Nothing I like more in a tennis player than being a mixture of Ivanovic and Henin.

Imagine Hantuchova winning Wimbledon.

Yeah not gonna happen thankfully!

Venus' returns lol.

If only more players were like Henin ;_;