Poll: what's the worst part of getting old?

The great fear is of some sort of degenerative illness, forcing an active mind to live in a sedentiary body.

Then again:

1) I was quite poorly between the ages of 24 to 28, and actually I didn't feel much like going clubbing/eating marv meals, etc. So, the mind adapts to circumstances...
2) A famous author had some sort of alzheimers (was it Doris Lessing?), her husband famously remarked that by the end she loved watching the Teletubbies. OK, that seems like horror, but it's still a happy body/mind...

It's that fear that makes people suicidal at the first instance of forgetting something that should be solid within memory (name of husband/wife/kids, that sort of thing)

Hangovers.
Hangovers.
Hangovers.
Hangovers.
Hangovers.
Hangovers.
Hangovers.
Hangovers.
Hangovers.
Hangovers.
Hangovers.
Hangovers.
Hangovers.
Hangovers.
Hangovers.
Hangovers.
Hangovers.

Naah, they were always awful, it's just that you can't remember what they were like when you were 18 (for example)...

It's weird to have so many people OTM-ing the loss of wonder

It's not really a conscious thing, it's just the way it is. I'm always open to a new film or piece of music knocking me out, and now and again, that does happen. But when I think about how (to use the same two examples) Taxi Driver and Neil Young hit me when I was 17 or 18, it's just highly unlikely that anything will overwhelm me to the same degree again.

No but there are compensatory pleasures and other ways of being surprised by joy...and recognizing it when it comes.

Absolutely. Believe me, I absolutely hate jadedness. I've always told myself that if that ever creeps into my writing, I'll simply stop writing. It's the most tiresome thing in the world.

my immediate answers today are "my knees" and "the morning after eating Indian food."

so these nails youre talking about are toenails, right?

I absolutely must expand my vocabulary.

Worse hangovers!

when I think about how (to use the same two examples) Taxi Driver and Neil Young hit me when I was 17 or 18, it's just highly unlikely that anything will overwhelm me to the same degree again.

Nothing wrong with raising your standards

Is that because now you can afford to drink more? (xpost)

When I see this thread title I can't ward off "The best part of wakin up.... is Folger's in your cup!"

Like more and more years of my life are happening w no one to witness them except me, and I am an unreliable narrator

This is the problem with people thinking fiction is like life, in which all narrators are unreliable.

I enjoy doing things in which the absence of witnesses is a plus.

Speaking of which, one great thing about being older now is that all the stupid things I did when I was younger, and all the writing I did that would make me cringe now, is lost to history--vanished into thin air, or buried in local publications that no has anymore except me and a handful of people. No YouTube, no Facebook, no internet, no permanent record.

I voted the aging skin thing, but really it's just a placeholder as the most visible sign of physical deterioration. Body betrayal, and hate that just as I became more comfortable with myself in my head, the outside no longer matches up. Having kids a bit late too, and feeling each year I waited, as a year of their lives that I will miss. Not strictly true of course, but can't help the feeling

so these nails youre talking about are toenails, right?

I've seen it happen to fingernails too, occasionally.

About three of my toenails are grievous, but no one sees em.

another awesome thing about getting older: being entitled to refer to the youth as "young cats" lol

Well, actual childlike wonder is a bit impossible to sustain--it would be strange if we all commuted to work kneeling backwards on the subway bench so that we could stare out the window beaming idiotically with excitement--but maybe something halfway between childish enthusiasm and adult deadishness would be nice? Most adults just seem so resigned and beaten down by life.

Another loss is the heady emotionality of the teenage years. It didn't seem enjoyable at the time, but it would be nice to feel so intensely about everything again . . . maybe.

i have become prone to some really annoying emotionality, particularly crying, and as a man this is pretty embarrassing. fortunately, this has a not-too-broad range of typical triggers, such as observing my kids and freaking the fuck out over how fleeting their childhoods are, and fearing/knowing that my ability to have the role that i have with them is similarly brief.

when louden wainwright's "picture" hits your player and you just cry over your kids, that's too much. plus, it adds in the category of "increased tolerance for aging, balding male singer-songwriters."

new contender

Being closer to death wins every time, and the fact that it's not an option on this poll is telling of the age and/or awareness of the person who started it.

death is all around, guys

And if you're not afraid of that, there's little else worth being afraid of.

fear is the mind killer

death is all around, guys

*throws beret*

Well, exactly! We all deny death as a matter of getting through every day. SO why freak out about things that aren't DEATH? (Apart from certain things, like waterboarding.)

tbrr "watching friends and relatives dying ahead of you" seems to be edging out fear of personal death as the worst part of getting old

Being closer to death wins every time

This is where following American politics and projecting waht the 2060s will be like provides a silver lining.

Diminishing employability

Bad as growing old alone must be, growing old in a close, loving relationship isn't perfect either. You know one of you will almost certainly die first. That thought is scarier than death for me.

Varicose veins

Actually my main problem is that I've gotten so handsome the ladies just will NOT. leave me. alone.

^^^

You are both sleek and dashing, but the worm is about to turn.

The worst part about getting old: acquiring the arithmetic skills necessary to calculate how old your grandparents were when your parents finally reached their age, then subtracting how many years they (your parents) have left.

man death is so certain I don't even see the point in fearing it, it's like being afraid of the sun

^^^

acquiring the arithmetic skills necessary to calculate how old your grandparents were when your parents finally reached their age, then subtracting how many years they (your parents) have left.

eh my grandmother's about to turn 101 and my mother is 65 so that doesn't seem so bad.

by that math I have a whole other lifetime to live coming to me

a close family friend is 95 (or maybe 96 at this point, wo), and in the past year, she's tried to stop eating, stop getting out of bed, and stop communicating verbally, though she's perfectly capable of doing all of these things. the reason she gives? "all of my friends are dead, and i don't really care to adapt any longer, i did that for 90 years." tbh, i'm on her side, and sort of wish the family would just let her die.

saw a couple items on last wwi soldier who was 110 and thought, "hmm i hope he was happy, because otherwise i rly don't wanna be that dude."

Being closer to death wins every time, and the fact that it's not an option on this poll is telling of the age and/or awareness of the person who started it.

― DSMOS has arrived (kenan), Wednesday, May 11, 2011 11:20 AM (29 minutes ago)

mmmm, probably, but speculation on how it's telling on me would be telling on the speculators. #infiniterecursion

You know, I'll sleep a bit easier once I get to the point that my friends and loved ones are dying in hospital beds surrounded by their grandchildren rather than getting run over by drunk drivers or overdosing on pills.

Dying isn't a huge fear. I just think about the kids once again. Talking to those who were minors when they lost their parents compared to those who were in their 50s or 60s when they became orphans, it really seems the latter is preferable to the former.

fwiw, I wanted to stick to the physical breakdowns accompanying aging, and almost didn't include the "fear of falling" one for that reason.

I'm okay with no longer existing. Hope it's not too painful getting there.

all the writing I did that would make me cringe now, is lost to history

Your old Graffiti stuff holds up just fine!

"Reduced energy" is the main one I'm really feeling so far - no more bounding up two flights of stairs, two steps at a time.

*throws beret*

A+ lol

Well, exactly! We all deny death as a matter of getting through every day. SO why freak out about things that aren't DEATH? (Apart from certain things, like waterboarding.)

― DSMOS has arrived (kenan), Wednesday, May 11, 2011 11:28 AM (37 minutes ago)

Every day I give less and less of a fuck about death, and more and more of a fuck about pain and discomfort. There's the telling difference between us, Kenan.

Older me is better than younger me but I think I'm not yet old enough to judge otherwise yet.

But I know the lovely unfathomableness of watching time pass, of watching my children age. I'm not sure what death is but what I fear is that important things will go on & I can never be there, & yet that is happening right now, as my children become & I am not there & can't be there & don't really always want to be there, but when you're there it is a such a glorious now: time stand still. So I know that, but I don't think that's a tragedy of getting old; it's more a tragedy of living.

i fear living to 110 more than i do death. but i think if had young kids, death would concern me a great deal more.