Innocuous things that make you irrationally angry (a list thread)

There's a tabloid celeb reporter that always use "s/he shrilled!". Urgggh.

that's just wrong, shrill isn't a verb. "trilled" maybe, but that would make my skin crawl.

in news writing "said" is the only acceptable way imo

- cackled
- spat
- sneered

Keep all three on hand for stories on Dick Cheney, Don Rumsfeld et al.

Is " '[X],' he eviled" proper construction?

xpost - my error, it is 'trilled' he uses.

i saw some more oyster rubbers today, utterly failing to make the barriers work the first time

"i don't understand, my rubbing technique is impeccable!"

tbh sometimes I have to do the rubbing to make it work - my usual Oyster action is to tap, but sometimes I get the Seek Assistance problem, and in that instance, rubbing seems to help.

probably a bad idea to gis 'oyster rubbing'

don't tap, just hold it there! though i know it feels less purposeful and dynamic...

Two interviews last month - one, a venerable old film director with weapons-grade twinkly-uncle schtick and a hellraiser past; the other a young French product designer who's very boisterous and mobile. In each case, just like always, I really want to convey the nuances of their conversation and how they behave while being questioned since all those little tells add up to an assessment of disposition and help to draw a portrait. Again, I do not work in news but where my work intersects with current events via a newsworthy subject, I like knowing that I'm not limited to 'said' or reactive descriptions only.

yeah i can totally see how for interview i'd do that. for news tho esp like hard bbc news style you get away with v little...

"after collecting the trophy, sanchez admitted he was a worthy winner"

"Okay, you got me. I'm not a loser after all!"

chick on facebook refers to Lynyrd Skynyrd as 'he' as if it is a person named Lynyrd Skynyrd.

Technically, kind of right, but still pretty lololol

It's not really right unless they're talking about the actions of the late schoolteacher. If they're talking about the band (which they would be, as the teacher's name isn't actually Lynyrd Skynyrd), then they're not even close to correct.

I remember walking into a Blockbuster music looking for Dimmu Borgir cds in like 1999 and not being able to find it as they had it filed under Borgir, Dimmu, as if it was a dude named Dimmu Borgir.

There's a whole thread about this: Band names that sound like one person

gum snappers
getting to a show too early on a cold rainy night and having to wait on line
standing in line
listening to dumb in-line conversations

fuck i am so crabby tonight I may stab everyone

having to wait IN line I meant

gum snapper behind me will be first to die

agh he is a sniffer too

add loud line-talkers, and chronic yawners. I need to chill, shit is driving me nuts

Hahah I was about to add "the phrase 'wait on line'" lol. Makes no sense rargh sounds so jarring.

I notice lots of East-Coasters use the "wait on line" thing.

hey mr. 40 something businessman who flashed his lights 7 times at me to make a right turn on red, did you happen to see the illuminated "No Turn on Red" sign? just for that I'm going to have sex with one of your relatives

*zips up*

Looks like Russell Brand's b just expired.

Fuckwits in meetings saying "Can I just talk to that point?"

No, you can talk ABOUT it, or, preferably, fuck off and die.

Oh thats a new one. Ughhh.

also 'go-live' as a noun or adjective

ugh god Mr Veg drops uber-tech-corporate speak on me every now and again...talk about grammatical child abuse. It makes me cry.

you need to reach out to him for a blue-sky session imo

what makes me irrationally angry is understanding what these should-be-meaningless phrases mean

'Going forward' doesn't mean anything in any context ever, so that's easy. Everything else means 'I am a wanker'.

Any time someone uses the phrase "software architecture" or someone being an "architect" when they mean "software architect" my actual-architect friend goes nuts.

I told him we like to use "architect" as a verb all the time and he sputtered so hard I thought he was going to bite his tongue off.

System architecture is fair enough because it's the architecture of a system. That makes perfect sense and the application of the term is sound. IT uses loads of words as metaphors for other things anyway, e.g. a window is no longer just a thing you can jump through to effect an untimely death.

'Architect' as a verb is illegal and deserving of capital punishment, though.

'Going forward' doesn't mean anything in any context ever, so that's easy.

I've thought a lot about this, and I think "going forward" is a useful synonym for "from now on." "From now on" can sound like a demand or like there is an ultimatum in there somewhere, whereas "going forward" is gentler.

It's not used that way though, it's always jammed into sentences that express 'from now on' perfectly well on their own, i.e. in the phrase 'we will be implementing a strategy going forward' the word 'will' does the job all by itself. If you have a crack at 'this is our strategy going forward', you could just as well say 'this will be our strategy'.

or, of course, 'this is our strategy from now on'

Actually saying "going forward" makes it clear that it will not apply to retroactive cases. That's obviously not applicable in many situations, but it works when needed.

It doesn't need to exist, and in 99.94% of sentences it's completely redundant. I'm sure 'pop it in your think tank and see if it does the doggy paddle' works when needed too.

Did you just invent that one? It's pretty great.

Got it off Drop the Dead Donkey iirc.

people who put Bon Jovi's "Livin on a Prayer" on their FB profile and comment "remember this one", AS IF I HAVEN'T HEARD IT MULTIPLE TIMES A WEEK FOR THE LAST TEN YEARS

What, do you live in a ROLLER RINK?

A. karaoke nights
B. half my friends like Bon Jovi. I still maintain he ruined rock music

c) it's his ring tone

(joeks!! please don't sex my relatives)

Any time someone uses the phrase "software architecture" or someone being an "architect" when they mean "software architect" my actual-architect friend goes nuts.

I read a novel by a programmer recently which said most programmers like to think of themselves as architects, whereas sadly all they actually get to do is the plumbing

Tangentially related to Bon Jovi: ads/TV shows/whatevers which use music based on its title, with no regard for the actual words...

Some examples:

1 my wife works for the local ambulance authority, and they had new uniforms introduced. The corporate video used Scorpions' 'Winds of CHange', with appropriate mentions of Gorky Park and other Cold War era references

2 local Adelaide radio station which promoted itself using the Whitlams song (You've got to) Love this City, despite the fact that said song is explicitly about Sydney, and even more particularly about Sydney being a great big whore for the Olympics

Lust for Life being used on a cruise ship ad was my favorite example