Innocuous things that make you irrationally angry (a list thread)

The ultimate lol is that I married into a family of catholics.

I shopped a pic of myself to add inverted crosses and satanic markings to use in these situations

Everyone I know who is even remotely "religious" is token Catholic, or Jewish by bloodline, and none of em follow it.

'er indoors is only catholic because she was baptised, she doesn't believe or subscribe to any of it.

re: whatsyer church question, I learned from "Bartleby the Scrivener" that people respond really strongly to the phrase "I would prefer not to," as in "I would prefer not to discuss it." They look baffled every time! And it never comes up again.

It has that tone of "how dare you!" about it, I must say :) I like!

I did tell the mega-xtian lady at my work that I was an atheist, and the next day she offered to fix my congenital anosmia with faith healing, so I think it didn't really phase her. Meaning she interacts with me like one of her own.

Sounds a bit passive-aggressive 'you are wrong, witness my relative normalcy' imo.

the faith healing does?

bcz imo offering to faith heal someone on their break at work is basically the height of crazoid

"let's get in a quick miracle and then back to phone calls"

Her offer does, yep. The way some religious people frame atheists within the context of their belief system, except this one sounds off the scale.

Sort of like when vegetarians are given a plate of carrots at a restaurant run by people who can't comprehend vegetarians.

^^better than what you get at vegie bar tbqh

I think she's just crazy. She told me she became Christian because her parents are swingers, and when she found her high school teacher was one of her father's partners, she responded by burning the teacher's house down. Which is pretty black metal for a fundie chick.

http://i.cdn.turner.com/v5cache/TBS/Images/Dynamic/i38/Office_ANGELA_KINSEY_240x260_081620070952.jpg

Uh, I would quit a job if I had to work with an arsonist.

Next time I get asked I want to well time a juicy fart...

She printed me out a picture Belle and the Beast from Beauty and the Beast, which she said was "to put on your netbook." I told her I didn't have a netbook and she laughed.

This woman makes me irrationally delighted!

tbh she burnt the house down at the tender age of 15, 10 years ago. I thought it was cool. It's like working with crazy Christian Left Eye!

Lol

when she found her high school teacher was one of her father's partners, she responded by burning the teacher's house down.

http://trashfilmorgy.com/wordpress/wp-content/gallery/eric-bradner-is-a-babe/donniedarko1.jpg

She printed me out a picture Belle and the Beast from Beauty and the Beast, which she said was "to put on your netbook." I told her I didn't have a netbook and she laughed.

SEE?!?? She thinks everyone is secretly like her!

I'd suspect this were my mother, apart from the religion bit.

not the arson?

not the arson

I mean I don't know if she's ever set fire to a house but it wouldn't surprise me.

I find your co-worker kinda fascinating. Curse of Millhaven in yr midst?

Yeah Abbott there's a whole deindexed thread in this woman, get to it plz.

I've basically told you everything./

Oh wait, she also gave me a Christmas card of a puppy in a Santa hat and on the inside she wrote: "I am sorry I conformed all Christian as hypocrites, but I love Him and you know it :)" (sic)

o_0

I cant even parse that.

She asked me about why people say "happy holidays" and she genuinely didn't know that other major world religions had holidays in December. She also didn't know Narnia is sorta Bible-y. She had also never heard the phrase "lion of Judah," and she went to some sort of ministry school, so??? These things made me wonder if she was on some faux-naîf tip but I ultimately concluded she's for real.

So is her job standing in doorways or something? Because I can't imagine this woman pulling off anything more complex than making shapes with a crayon.

Bit harsh there, Schlaf? Seems like a strange, but friendly-to-Abbbott lady imo

Bit harsh? Nah. However strange/nice she is there's evidence of some missing screws in Abbott's retelling.

Ok so this aint innocuous except in the fact that it didn't affect me directly.

So heading to work this morning, I head into the toll lane, the E-pass lane, and I notice this empty car just parked in the Exact Change lane blocking the lane. There was a car behind him trying to get by.

Then I see the driver of the unmanned car, dressed business casual with a Bluetooth, and he's walked to the toll window, apparently not realizing that its an unmanned booth (as most exact change lanes are in Cent Florida - budget cuts).

He then walks grinning over to the annoyed driver who is trying to get around his car and apparently asks the driver for change as I guess the idiot had cash only.

FFS YOU ARENT GOING TO GET A TICKET VIOLATING ONCE AND MAYBE YOU SHOULD HAVE READ THE SIGN THAT SAID EXACT CHANGE YOU M0R0N AGGGRGHHHHGGI0O00CYCLOPSARGHHHHHH

-just broke two glasses (one wine, one pint) within 30 seconds
-cf spilling things upthread, swore very very very loudly
-neighbors aint home
-feeling better

u kno ur too tightly wound when breaking a glass feels like an emotionally exhausting experience

^^ omg truth bomb, and a familiar metric for "how stressed am i"

- dropping coins. The attention-getting noise they make, the sad pitying looks, people trying to help you which is almost worse than them standing around but I like that they're trying to be nice, scrabbling round like a moron trying to pick them up
Fuck a coin.

p much

like srsly was like whew i need to sit down, take stock of things. dude it's a fucking wine glass, relax

xp

also wrt coins---unless they're quarters, i just let em roll.

Jeanne Dielman to thread

Coins are arseholes. Anything less than 50c can get fucked.

'Oh here, you forgot your 5c change'
'NO I DIDN'T'
'But it's your 5c'
'FUCK OFF FUCK OFF'

- our haunted HP Officejet printer and it's stupid alerts that go off every day when the ink is barely half empty and that doesn't really work properly and probably needs a clean but holy christ it's so NEEDY now that it's crapping out on us. Work. Don't work. But don't flash your alerts at me and have me troubleshoot you when you're only going to do half the job.

- taking down the Christmas tree. It's pointy and scratchy and now is when I wish we had a real tree that I could just drag into the street for the garbageman to take away.

If you live in the country, real xmas trees that have dried out are awesome to set on fire.

here we have to break our tress into segments and put them into plant waste bins, which means lazy people have taken to sneak-dumping their trees in odd places, like the side of highways, the middle of public parks, etc.