Great Real Names

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when i was on grand jury duty a few years ago several of the cases we reviewed were by a repeat offender named Little Willie. Literally, his first name was Little and his surname Willie.

― latebloomer (latebloomer), Wednesday, 6 September 2006 05:34 (nineteen years ago)

one month passes...

I just sent mail to a woman called Pr1ncess K1ng.

― Tuomas (Tuomas), Thursday, 26 October 2006 06:09 (nineteen years ago)

I went to summer camp with Marsha Mello.

― Edward Bordas (edb), Thursday, 26 October 2006 12:51 (nineteen years ago)

I work with D4rr3n D34th. I keep telling him he should finish his PhD.

― Stephen X (Stephen X), Thursday, 26 October 2006 14:23 (nineteen years ago)

i'd fund him!

― teh_kit (g-kit), Thursday, 26 October 2006 14:23 (nineteen years ago)

Dev0n D0ng

― The Milkmaid (82375538-A) (The Milkmaid), Thursday, 26 October 2006 14:42 (nineteen years ago)

I processed someone's student visa who had the name of: MeGa Ho

― molly d (mollyd), Thursday, 26 October 2006 15:09 (nineteen years ago)

As mentioned in the Football Manager thread, Bedford Town striker Barrington Belgrave

― Sadly, he will be the next Alexis Petridish. (Dom Passantino), Thursday, 26 October 2006 15:13 (nineteen years ago)

When I was working fundraising calls for the university, I had a person on my list called My Wang.

― It's the lazy and immoral way to become super hip. (Austin, Still), Thursday, 26 October 2006 15:13 (nineteen years ago)

The Book of Heroic Failures mentions someone called Depressed Cupboard Cheesecake. That's pretty bad.

― Treblekicker (treblekicker), Thursday, 26 October 2006 15:31 (nineteen years ago)

three weeks pass...

Today I was looking for a CV from a commercials company - the person I had to speak to was called Di11y Gent.

― === temporary username === (Mark C), Tuesday, 21 November 2006 12:27 (nineteen years ago)

Yesterday I sent an email to someone named Venus Speedwell.

― Euai Kapaui (tracerhand), Tuesday, 21 November 2006 12:32 (nineteen years ago)

Big round of applause for Redditch United centreback Exodus Geohaghan.

― dommy p is alright WHICH IS A LOT MORE THAN I CAN SAY ABOUT A LOT OF PEOPLE (Dom, Tuesday, 21 November 2006 12:34 (nineteen years ago)

My mom recently went to a talk on the viscoelastic properties of mucus, given by one Prof. Richard Superfine.

― Good-Time Slim, Uncle Doobie, and the Great 'Frisco Freak-Out (sixteen sergeants, Tuesday, 21 November 2006 12:37 (nineteen years ago)

six months pass...

DeLorean Churby

OMG

― Hurting 2, Thursday, 14 June 2007 02:30 (nineteen years ago)

I knew someone once called Barry Ireland. It's very funny if you're Welsh.

― nate woolls, Thursday, 14 June 2007 08:56 (nineteen years ago)

My aunt had a childhood playmate named Tucker Plumstead.

I went to college with a girl named Guinevere Schmuck.

The recently-retired CFO of my company is named C0nn1e Cumm1ng5, and yet is not a pornstar.

― Phil D., Thursday, 14 June 2007 13:20 (nineteen years ago)

two months pass...

Michael D. Jew (defendant in a lawsuit I just read)

― Hurting 2, Wednesday, 22 August 2007 16:32 (eighteen years ago)

Ulysses Carbon: http://www.guardian-series.co.uk/mostpopular.var.1602710.mostviewed.breaking_news_man_charged_with_walthamstow_murder.php

― CharlieNo4, Wednesday, 22 August 2007 16:48 (eighteen years ago)

two months pass...

Random Justice Phillips

― Hurting 2, Tuesday, 6 November 2007 15:32 (eighteen years ago)

three weeks pass...

Did I not post Manjula Icecreamwalla?

― Hurting 2, Wednesday, 28 November 2007 03:34 (eighteen years ago)

somebody in my class once was apparently named Man-On Chin

― Bo Jackson Overdrive, Wednesday, 28 November 2007 03:36 (eighteen years ago)

kenny gee

― Hurting 2, Wednesday, 12 December 2007 01:40 (eighteen years ago)

http://www.sullivanandcromwell.com/lawyers/detail.aspx?attorney=140

― sanskrit, Wednesday, 12 December 2007 01:52 (eighteen years ago)

I used one of those address look-up things for an internship. I remember the last name in the registry was Zolton Zzzytwit. I was also surprised by the number of people with the last name Hitler in the US.

― clotpoll, Wednesday, 12 December 2007 04:28 (eighteen years ago)

Rear Admiral John Stufflebeam

Also: When I was in grade school, my friends and I used to look up odd names in the phone book, make "clever" little rhymes or poems about the names, and prank call said individuals. Some names I remember from those days:

Dirk Greep, Zoltan Papp, Vernon Winklepleck

― Pillbox, Wednesday, 12 December 2007 04:33 (eighteen years ago)

i knew a dude with the last name Manlove once

― Bo Jackson Overdrive, Wednesday, 12 December 2007 04:35 (eighteen years ago)

More: Boutros-Boutros Ghali; Shecki "the Jackyl"

― Pillbox, Wednesday, 12 December 2007 04:35 (eighteen years ago)

Rageing Warr, convicted in Indiana of "battery by body waste"

― Hurting 2, Thursday, 13 December 2007 14:36 (eighteen years ago)

apparently that just referred to her spitting in a cop's face, which is not as gross as I was imagining

― Hurting 2, Thursday, 13 December 2007 14:41 (eighteen years ago)

A woman at my work has the first name Godsent.

― franny glass, Thursday, 13 December 2007 18:56 (eighteen years ago)

There's a U.S. District Court judge in Pennsylvania named Sylvia Rambo. This is mostly just funny because on her opinions it says "Rambo, District Judge"

― Hurting 2, Friday, 14 December 2007 15:42 (eighteen years ago)

Zaytoon Matchiswala {Olive of the Match family}

― Crêpe, Friday, 14 December 2007 15:59 (eighteen years ago)

in retrospect, Aym3ric Fr@ise is kinda interesting

― gabbneb, Wednesday, 19 December 2007 17:59 (eighteen years ago)

From upthread, I used to know D1lly Gent!

Good one in my own family, my great-grandfather, LaMonte Mercereau.

― suzy, Wednesday, 19 December 2007 18:52 (eighteen years ago)

Ruby Mae Mozingo

― Alex in Baltimore, Wednesday, 2 January 2008 17:18 (eighteen years ago)

gurf morlix

― gff, Wednesday, 2 January 2008 17:39 (eighteen years ago)

Sophal Um

― Alex in Baltimore, Wednesday, 2 January 2008 17:43 (eighteen years ago)

Junior Agogo.

― Grandpont Genie, Thursday, 3 January 2008 11:33 (eighteen years ago)

Gillian Mckeith has a daughter called Afton Magaziner.

With a last name like that, I'd at least try to give my child a semblance of normality with a usual sounding first name. But Afton? Isn't that in Surrey somewhere?

― JTS, Friday, 4 January 2008 03:24 (eighteen years ago)

Knox Burger

And I once worked with a campanologist called Dickon Love.

― Michael Dudikoff presents Action Adventure Theatre, Friday, 4 January 2008 15:12 (eighteen years ago)

I swear to god: Britney Timberlake.

― franny glass, Friday, 4 January 2008 15:17 (eighteen years ago)

V0ndarius H4wk1ns

My friend had him as a student in...2d grade, I think?

― B.L.A.M., Friday, 4 January 2008 15:38 (eighteen years ago)

Joseph Metallic

― Alex in Baltimore, Monday, 7 January 2008 14:58 (eighteen years ago)

Burnelle Burnell

― Alex in Baltimore, Tuesday, 15 January 2008 15:04 (eighteen years ago)

Chief Kickingstallionsims, a 7-0, 245 pound center for Alabama State.

― Pleasant Plains, Tuesday, 15 January 2008 15:36 (eighteen years ago)

Dusky R1de0ut

― kate78, Tuesday, 15 January 2008 22:51 (eighteen years ago)

Guy I know lived with a S0rley 4rthur Cleb0.

― jim, Tuesday, 15 January 2008 22:55 (eighteen years ago)

One of my clients had the first name J4tlaneezy, and another was W00lfdy.

― miryam, Tuesday, 15 January 2008 23:17 (eighteen years ago)

Byron F. Iglesias

― Alex in Baltimore, Thursday, 17 January 2008 20:52 (eighteen years ago)

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