What do you hate?

I hate quiche, mayonnaise, tartare sauce and the majority of white foodstuffs. I hate having a great 7 letter word but nowhere to play it. I hate the way my skin is blotchy and full of blackheads. I hate the way I am incapable of getting up in the morning to go for a run and my general fitness levels.

I do not hate bicycles. I just think they are a hundred levels of ALIENATION. I do not hate cyclists. I worry for them, is all.

hello everyone at the municipal office, since i can tell you're reading this!

'This desk is TOO COLD'

'This desk is JUST RIGHT'

two. raves with lasers that don't come down low enough to dance in.

three. people who think raves are just drug parties. when will they understand the community spirit of rave culture? probably never!!!

four. people who think it all happened in the eighties. i was born in 1985, and fuck all happened to me.

1967

1974

1976

1979-82

1988

1993

2004

I think that 1993 was an especially good year: techno, black metal, ambience, all kinds of things. You really must come and say hello on the mongrels and sheepfuxors thread Mr Attacker.

people who insist on driving one foot off my bumper on a pretty empty freeway, when I'm already doing 80

liver

brussel sprouts

mayo

eggs

people who say nuke-u-lar

'a lot' written as 'alot'

the gardeners who start work at 6 am Wednesday morning around my building

bronchitis

people who belittle others for not having gone to college

assholes who purport to be 'good christians' while they stab you in the back

atm dawdlers

mariah carey

my sister when she tells me that I don't know ______ yet and she does because she's older and refuses to listen when I tell her that I worked ________ out when I was about 12

sushi

jaegermeister

that squeaky sound balloons make sometimes

the sound of people eating

the way my ex thought boob grabbing was a turn on for me, too

eyeliner pencils that break when you're using them

people who can't fucking merge onto the damned freeway and pull out in front of me GOING THIRTY FIVE

grown people who throw tantrums

leaving my favorite discontinued lipstick in the car and having it melt and die

anise

people who say things like, 'so how are we doing on project x' when they've had nothing whatsoever to do with it

coffee grounds or eggshells in the sink

people who seem to forget how to work the handle on the toilet after they've taken big nasty craps and then walk out and leave it as a gift to the rest of mankind. lemme tell you lady, your shit stinks.

people who want to spray me with perfume in stores - thank you no, I already put some on before I left the house and yours smells like a monkey's armpit after a particularly difficult day in the jungle.

people who lie and think I'm too dumb to figure it out

the fact that I'm hypocritical sometimes

the smell of burnt popcorn

running around like a maniac trying to get something done at work while my co-workers sits on her ass and checks her email every two and a half seconds

wet towels on my bed

Me too, ass well as the variation of it known as "bongchitis".

You work with Matthew Broderick?

Oops.

I've said too much.

accentmonkey is so unbelievably OTM here. I want to punch them out repeatedly.

Anyway....

- People who pronounce "idea" as eye-dear
- Political Strategists (for either party)
- Tucker Carlson
- Public figures who use sports analogies to make their point.
- People who get all uppity about their right to fly the Confederate Flag. It's offensive. Let it go.

But what do you hat?

Distilled hatredry.

"accentmonkey is so unbelievably OTM here. I want to punch them out repeatedly."

Agree absolutely. English deserves too loose its status as a major language if its speakers are to lose with its spelling of such basic words.

Most British people to thread.

(x-post rhymes with Ikea, innit?)

I too get extremely irritated whenever someone spells "a lot" as just the one word. Argh. Growl. (FYI, many people locally do not know how to merge PERIOD here. And they do pretty much what you described in your list, too.)

Also extreme irritants:

- Drivers who are on the "fast" lane (i.e. left, at least here in the good ol' US of A) who drive like twenty miles UNDER the speed limit.
- Drivers who are on the "slow" lane (i.e. right, at least... you know the drill) who drive like twenty miles OVER the speed limit.
(Please you guys, get the drift of FAST lanes and SLOW lanes.)
- People (mostly women, it seems) who are so enamored of shoes that they seem not to be able to think of another topic to discuss OR who splurge on like $500 pairs of shoes. Even if they're supremely wealthy and could actually afford it. SUCH a waste of money, in my eyes.
- Couples who splurge MEGA bucks on their wedding festivities. I saw this special on the Food Network once where this YOUNG couple got married at Walt Disney World, and all their wedding expenses JUST AT THE PARK ALONE came out to $70,000. You read that right. *sighs* Such a sin.
- People who pride themselves on having "open" minds, who then retreat to outdated stereotypes when it comes to certain segments of the population (e.g. people who live in the rural South, Texans, Americans). The people in charge of special programming for the Trio channel AS WELL AS the idiots at Channel 4 UK, I AM LOOKING DIRECTLY AT YOU.
- Texas Monthly magazine. The Texas they portray isn't the Texas I know, it's the Texas the residents of the DFW area and Houston know. If they're only going to bother with the Eastern portion of TX, why don't they just call themselves "East Texas Monthly" and stick to selling in those regions of the state?
- People who choose to ignore you instead of telling you they have a problem with you. Such cowardly bullshit.
- Valentine's Day. Worst and longest day of the year.
- Kurt Loder. I had no idea he was still on an MTV channel. He's old enough to be my father and even *I* feel guilty about watching anything MTV-related, much like I did when I was nine and still watching "Mister Rogers' Neighborhood".
- Parents who try to be "cool" parents and aim for being their children's Best Friends, instead of honoring and respecting the boundaries between parent and child and just being parents.
- The local program "Gimme the Mike!", which is a local version of "American Idol" except without the two reasons anyone watches that program -- one, the crankiness of Simon Cowell, and two, ACTUAL SINGING TALENT. Believe it or not, one of the judges is BOB THE BACHELOR. Dude, he's still in the C-list -- you don't do local programs until you're well into the F-list, at least.

*whew* I feel lots better now.

(So, in this way, "ide-aa" in North American pronunciation becomes "ide-ar" in English pronunciation. I wish I could explain it any better than this.)

But now I've given this tiny little matter far too much of my attention probably ;-)