My mother's incredibly stupid ex-husband

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Ned, I'm sure we all envy you and your heavy rains and mudslides right about now.

Hurrah! Oh wait.

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Wednesday, 31 December 2003 02:08 (twenty-two years ago)

I forgot how great these stories are.

― Aaron W (Aaron W), Wednesday, 31 December 2003 02:42 (twenty-two years ago)

Man, this Chris guy is a dumbass, but I kinda wanna get fucked up with him and taperecord the entire time, and then use excerpts of intros/hidden subliminal messages on Josta Baby's triumphant return 50-song quadruple-disc EP to the world of ROCK.

― Helltime Producto (Pavlik), Wednesday, 31 December 2003 03:06 (twenty-two years ago)

So you're mum's still with him then? She must be quite patient.

― the music mole (colin s barrow), Wednesday, 31 December 2003 05:28 (twenty-two years ago)

The great mass of mums lead lives of quiet desperation.

― Aimless, Wednesday, 31 December 2003 05:38 (twenty-two years ago)

heh. *insert BurmaKitty joke here*

― mmmm (Kingfish), Wednesday, 31 December 2003 05:41 (twenty-two years ago)

Sounds to me that any fool 30-40 year old man can have his pick of intelligent single women in their 30's. That's good news for people like me.

― the music mole (colin s barrow), Wednesday, 31 December 2003 05:45 (twenty-two years ago)

she divorced him after four years

― M Matos (M Matos), Wednesday, 31 December 2003 08:32 (twenty-two years ago)

three months pass...

also, she was in her early-mid 20s during all this. so was he.

― Matos W.K. (M Matos), Monday, 5 April 2004 05:39 (twenty-two years ago)

Bloody hell Matos. You just paused for four months before continuing that thought.

― the music mole (colin s barrow), Monday, 5 April 2004 05:48 (twenty-two years ago)

[[shrugs]] I was re-reading this and noticed I'd left that one open. now it's closed.

― Matos W.K. (M Matos), Monday, 5 April 2004 05:50 (twenty-two years ago)

There's a slight reference to this in Sign 'O' The Times though subtle. :)

― donut bitch (donut), Monday, 5 April 2004 05:55 (twenty-two years ago)

("this" being "Chris" and the concept/reality thereof, not the continued thought)

― donut bitch (donut), Monday, 5 April 2004 05:56 (twenty-two years ago)

Is that the longest space between a double post from one author pursuing a single thought? I think it may be.

― the music mole (colin s barrow), Monday, 5 April 2004 06:05 (twenty-two years ago)

research needed

― amateur!st (amateurist), Monday, 5 April 2004 06:11 (twenty-two years ago)

haha Frank Kogan to thread!

― Matos W.K. (M Matos), Monday, 5 April 2004 06:33 (twenty-two years ago)

Rip Van Matos.

― the music mole (colin s barrow), Monday, 5 April 2004 06:35 (twenty-two years ago)

There's a slight reference to this in Sign O The Times though subtle.

japanese import reissue bonus track: Can't Turn My Face N2 a <3

― m., Monday, 5 April 2004 06:43 (twenty-two years ago)

Japanese DVD contains unreleased live tracks "U Lie Like A Kite" and "Let's Go O.U.T.S.I.D.E. So We Can Funk"

― donut bitch (donut), Monday, 5 April 2004 07:32 (twenty-two years ago)

"Fuddrucker Funk (Brains of Two Cents Remix)"

― Matos W.K. (M Matos), Monday, 5 April 2004 07:34 (twenty-two years ago)

That this thread isn't continuing its glorious path after being revived is a matter of great sadness to me.

― Markelby (Mark C), Monday, 5 April 2004 12:11 (twenty-two years ago)

I like the turn it's taking!

― stockholm cindy (Jody Beth Rosen), Monday, 5 April 2004 13:37 (twenty-two years ago)

Maybe the further stories are so horrific Matos can't bear to bring them up.

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Monday, 5 April 2004 15:21 (twenty-two years ago)

no, I just can't think of any others

― Matos W.K. (M Matos), Monday, 5 April 2004 15:58 (twenty-two years ago)

they'll all come back to you in repressed-memory therapy.

― Ask For Samantha (thatgirl), Monday, 5 April 2004 16:01 (twenty-two years ago)

three weeks pass...

You know, surely this thread was more responsible for ILX conversational references and gambits more than any other.

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Wednesday, 28 April 2004 05:11 (twenty-two years ago)

This was a great thread. Forgot about it.

― Skottie, Wednesday, 28 April 2004 05:16 (twenty-two years ago)

I would like the best threads to be compiled into book form some day. Trucker Cap Guy On Couch With Flatmate would be there, Cheese Fry would be there... and this one obviously...

― the music mole (colin s barrow), Wednesday, 28 April 2004 05:23 (twenty-two years ago)

one month passes...

Gee maltos, have you ever thought you might being just a little hard on him? Granted, he was stupid, but maybe trying a little bit...why else would he take you fishing at all... and as for forgetting the can opener, who doesn't forget things now and then. The whole "who sings this"... Guess Who thing... He was probably trying to play with you... don't you think? I'm sure at eight you must have had something on your mind other than how stupid your stepfather was. Lighten up and play a little... and not at someone elses expense.

― Mother of three, Sunday, 6 June 2004 00:40 (twenty-two years ago)

Is that you Chris?

― Dan I. (Dan I.), Sunday, 6 June 2004 01:09 (twenty-two years ago)

NO, HE WAS A FUCKING ASSHOLE

― Matos W.K. (M Matos), Sunday, 6 June 2004 01:39 (twenty-two years ago)

I'm sure at eight you must have had something on your mind other than how stupid your stepfather was.

most ignorant comment on ILE ever, perhaps.

― Matos W.K. (M Matos), Sunday, 6 June 2004 01:43 (twenty-two years ago)

oh wait I just read a Momus post on a thread about terrorism nevermind

― Matos W.K. (M Matos), Sunday, 6 June 2004 01:52 (twenty-two years ago)

Maltos?

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Sunday, 6 June 2004 03:29 (twenty-two years ago)

she forgot the "meal," and I forgot to tell you all I'm a General Foods product

― Matos W.K. (M Matos), Sunday, 6 June 2004 03:49 (twenty-two years ago)

MALTOS...the FRESHMAKER

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Sunday, 6 June 2004 03:49 (twenty-two years ago)

NED RAGGETT STOP STEALING MY FEEBLE, INANE JOKES (they're all I have, sob)

― VengaDan Perry (Dan Perry), Sunday, 6 June 2004 03:52 (twenty-two years ago)

Your moment will yet come.

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Sunday, 6 June 2004 03:57 (twenty-two years ago)

"will"

― David R. (popshots75`), Sunday, 6 June 2004 04:48 (twenty-two years ago)

He was probably trying to play with you

BUAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAH!

This will be my excuse to project upon every deadbeat shithead ever.

― donut bitch (donut), Sunday, 6 June 2004 05:39 (twenty-two years ago)

Just because you're trying to play with a kid is no excuse for being incredibly stupid...

― Layna Andersen (Layna Andersen), Sunday, 6 June 2004 06:54 (twenty-two years ago)

Or mean (see not providing food out of his wages etc).

― ailsa (ailsa), Sunday, 6 June 2004 09:27 (twenty-two years ago)

Oh come on, your dad never played The Starvation Game with you?

― VengaDan Perry (Dan Perry), Sunday, 6 June 2004 14:24 (twenty-two years ago)

The rules for that one never were written down to our satisfaction.

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Sunday, 6 June 2004 14:25 (twenty-two years ago)

"You rolled a 5; no crullers for you, kiddo!"

― VengaDan Perry (Dan Perry), Sunday, 6 June 2004 14:28 (twenty-two years ago)

"WAAAAAA. Hey wait, this is a four-sided die!"

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Sunday, 6 June 2004 14:37 (twenty-two years ago)

ok sure the googler is clueless but any excuse to hear more Matos's mom's ex-husband stories is a good thing

― J0hn Darn1elle (J0hn Darn1elle), Sunday, 6 June 2004 14:50 (twenty-two years ago)

I completely agree with you, sir.

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Sunday, 6 June 2004 14:53 (twenty-two years ago)

Ok the Maltos thing is inexplicably KILLING me here... hahaholy crap!

― Kim (Kim), Sunday, 6 June 2004 18:25 (twenty-two years ago)

many thanks for reviving. I've always said a sense of humor is a necessary survival skill, but I had no idea...anxiously awaiting the Matos autobiography. Seriously: this is as funny/painful as David Sedaris.

― lovebug starski, Sunday, 6 June 2004 19:00 (twenty-two years ago)

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