Why I hate the Daily Mail, as distilled into one edition

what's the dilly with NZ? not a large muslim population iirc

big export country, maybe just don't want to cut potential markets?

That would be the reason I imagine

some people actually do want to know how the sausage is made, i guess

People do but they can find out if it bothers them especially, or not eat whatever if they can't be certain. Don't disagree with taking an interest in gradations of cruelty but I don't think this story in this paper is ever going to be about a scientific enquiry into the most humane method of animal slaughter.

Onimo, I think that hitting a chicken on the head is likely to result in death

You'd maybe need to practise on a few to get the force just right to stun them. Those you could sell to the infidels.

and that which is distributed by the throwing of arrows

How does this work exactly?

that which has been slaughtered while proclaiming the name of any other than God

the banter in those kiwi slaughterhouses must be terrific

it's a regular rave-up:

Some slaughterhouses have introduced the practice of playing pre-recorded Bismillah. Hundreds and thousands of animals in particular chickens are being slaughtered as Halal with a tape playing ‘Bismillah Allahu Akbar’ in the background. This totally contravenes the requirement of the slaughtermen reciting the tasmiyah at the time of slaughter and is unacceptable in all traditional Islamic schools of thought.

How does this work exactly?

Just a form of divination - saggitomancy, or something, if I remember my latin - where arrows are thrown in the air or out of a quiver. I guess the furthest out and the direction are important - maybe they used it to decide which animal was to be slaughtered? Deciding on your burial place by firing an arrow out the window is, I guess, the same class of divination.

Some slaughterhouses have introduced the practice of playing pre-recorded Bismillah

Some of them just play the middle bit of "Bohemian Rhapsody" btw.

Pretty sure every single person reading this thread thought about saying that, and then decided against it.

The DM are bit behind on this, the Daily Star already ran a "Your kids FORCED to eat school dinners that a MUSLIM might have touched" story

http://www.islamophobia-watch.com/islamophobia-watch/2010/8/6/brit-kids-forced-to-eat-halal-school-dinners-claims-outraged.html

"We Demand our Less Expensive Meat!"

yeah, not the best place to link to

And anyone who believes that opposition to ritual slaughter in the name of animal rights is necessarily progressive should check out the biography of Arnold Leese, to whom the present-day BNP can trace its organisational and ideological roots.

oh, good argument

it's another piece of "Islamification of Britain" scaremongering in the Mail on Sunday, who adopt the pretence that they're motivated not by hostility towards Muslims but by concern for animal rights, just as they frame their campaign against "sharia courts" in terms of a defence of women's rights.

raises eyebrow

and some really, really solid material here: http://www.islamophobia-watch.com/islamophobia-watch/category/danish-cartoons

I was trying to draw attention to the Daily Star article, not that site. I'm sorry I didn't have time to scan every page for potentially offensive rhetoric, but I'm a little busy at the moment.

Look, let's just pretend I posted this one instead, and we can all just get on with our lives.

http://tabloid-watch.blogspot.com/2010/08/when-forcing-means-optional.html

the banter in those kiwi slaughterhouses must be terrific

The way that animal sacrifices worked in the Western ancient world was that the least appetizing part of the meat was the part that was burnt on the altar. The rest was distributed to the priests and the animal donors and possibly others, I don't know. This and the last few lines are basically prohibitions against participating in pagan worship.

(Yes, I know that the 7th century is a little too recent to refer to as the ancient world, but you know what I meant.)

http://news.sky.com/sky-news/content/StaticFile/jpg/2010/Sep/Week4/15742855.jpg

The Daily Mail claims police have revealed MI6 worker Gareth Williams, whose body was found in a sports bag in his London flat, could not have died alone and was padlocked into the holdall by someone else.

WELL DUH!!! I'm so glad that after all this time they have managed to clear that mystery up.

Do you think Jessica fletcher reads the Daily Mail?

He could have died alone, and then someone could have come along and bagged him up?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JAxXrH4SCdo

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=47g9_THTGCg

There was a story before that they thought he could have padlocked himself into the bag, and they got someone else to try it to see if it could be done (apparently it could).

One of the better Jonathan Creek eps.

Labour's new chief British political leader round conventions wedlock fatherhood.

Wow, less than 24 hours and they're running with bastard children jibes.

I need to train myself out of reading comments pages on news sites.

There is no suggestion that Ed Miliband is not Daniel’s father...

But we'll mention it here just in case...

the couple’s relaxed stance on marriage stands in contrast to David Cameron and Nick Clegg’s ultra-traditional set-up.

1) They have a 'stance' on marraige - the commie bastards
2) Ultra-traditional? Were they all virgins when they got married or something?

Oh, fuck this - last month they were all over Cleggwife for being all furrin and not taking her husband's name, etc.

Man, these Miliband guys are anagram gold!

Lib Dem and I

I'm Bin Lade

Media Blind

I ban middle

/sorry, off topic

be nil, I'm dad

Lab did 'em in

a bad livid mind

Not only them, mind.

David Romance
A divorced man
a candid mover

am rancid dove (?)

Am Devoid Narc.

"Previous party leaders have either been married or, as with Edward Heath, resolutely single."

Summary: No prime minister has ever got married while in office.

"Simply hasn't had time to fill in and sign the form"
OMG who are these 'people?' How do they run their lives?
When my 3 children were born over the years someone came to the hospital each time and said "sign here."
I smell a whiff of something else....

- Victor M, Cricklewood, London, 26/9/2010 13:43

^dunno what they signed but you can't register a child in hospital (assuming everywhere in the UK is the same as Scotland and you have to go in person to a registry office with id etc)

Bear in mind, Victor Meldrew had a great many fans.

She said I was not the kind of person ­— young, attractive and professional — that was usually admitted, so I was bound to ­generate curiosity among other patients.

wouldn't be surprised if this turns out to be my local hospital

Fact stranger than fiction: Winona Ryder played a woman on a psychiatric ward in the film Girl Interrupted

Oh, LizJonespaws:

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/femail/article-1318258/Hooters--offensive-bar-Britain-Asks-Liz-Jones.html

Sorry, I found this newspaper more offensive than Hooters.

Oh LizJonespaws, pt 2:

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/femail/article-1318377/Child-benefits-Wheres-having-pets-children.html

Only parents who adopt or foster should get special treatment; not the vain, self-obsessed, middle-class mums who have children only to get time off work and receive baby-shower gifts.

wtf

That Hooters thing is incredible, btw.

Does she not feel exposed, knowing all these men are looking at her bottom and cleavage? 'I feel quite covered up,' she says. 'This is no worse than what you see young women wearing here in Nottingham, out shopping or clubbing.'

This is true, but that is their choice. Here, exposing your thighs and cleavage is compulsory.

Sorry, did I miss the part where people were employed there at gunpoint?